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Such a fetish must surely get in the way of your profession, doctor.

Haa Haa.

I am aware you are neither a doctor nor do you have a fetish for scratches. I just wished for some humor at your expense.

Hee Hee.

I am also aware of what you are trying to imply, but I must insist that I am “Doc” Scratch, and not a doctor. Also, I have a complete lack of biology with which to be sexual. The joke is on you.

Hoo hoo.

this blog is literally not fair and may be hazardous to the health of sexually frustrated homestucks

sexcellent-host.tumblr.com

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Wait, Vriska is the girl on fire. This girl is on fire.

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Vriska, at least you will leave in a few hours.

Yeah…gr8. I get to leave these dum8os for another 8unch of dum8os. DEAD DUM8OS. SO GR8!!!!!!!! -Vriska

You look stressed. Perhaps you should take up a hobby. -Doc Scratch

8GH! -Vriska

You scare me. Why are you so scary?

I wouldn’t say I’m scary, exactly. I am intelligent, powerful, and delightful company, but have never been described as ‘scary’.

Then again, my only conversational partners for the last few years have been rambunctious troll children, so it’s no wonder. 

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