so since i’ve been cursed with the 40 hour (and counting?) stomach virus from hell, i have to cancel my new years eve plans, which i wouldn’t normally mind but i only get to see one of my best college friends like once per year and this was it, and another one of my friends is leaving soon for a year in turkey as well, so… this sucks.
thank you norovirus! i mean i spent 70% of 2012 doing very little, why couldn’t the universe have chosen one of those nights to give me incessant vomiting and diarrhea?
if anything positive has come from this, it is that i’ve discovered that vitamin water ice cubes make a really delicious treat. of course i may be biased, considering i’ve lost 9lbs in water weight since yesterday, but… i’m glad i’ve found a use for that crap
I can't get over what Ville looks like, those pics killed me last night, and the song we got live made me go kothrdjhtejd then die, that new song though. It makes me want the new CDso bad.
oh hi :))) were you at the show? omg luckyyy!!! I keep on waiting so bad for Tears On Tape too! and I wanna see HIM live asap! Aw Ville looks so young it’s unbeliveable! wow
so due to 1) hurricane and 2) brother leaving for bootcamp
i have to move out, find a job and a very inexpensive cat-tolerating place to live
in the next few weeks
i actually suppose i could move anywhere within affordable travel distance but i’d rather go where i know at least a few people already which limits me to either nyc, connecticut or upstate ny
anyway i am obviously quite stressed about this so obviously i’ve been preparing by making weed brownies and watching bad netflix (i just finished clue because i thought i’d been missing out on something, nope)
also dreading my birthday next week because i refuse to accept that i will be 25 and this is my life
it’s the end of 2012 and well that was fast.
there isn’t anything remotely good enough in the past 12 months for me to distinctly recall and ponder about. that happens to me every year doesn’t it. hah fuck.
i honestly don’t know why i am writing this because there isn’t anything special i can talk about. everyone else probably has really long year-end posts about their awesome year. this is probably just me for customs’ sake.
so… worst end to a year ever. it’s been prolonged for another 3 months. march 11 to be precise.
i’d like to think the guy i fell in love with a couple months back isn’t the same person i’m reading about in the news. but i don’t think that’s how reality works. reality lures you into thinking that you’ve gotten it all, that you’ve understood everything about it, that you’ve gotten a grasp of it, and right in the next instant, it all becomes a mirage that vanishes. reality is a mirage.
so this guy i’ve come to know about is just another one of those monsters. finding that tiny glimmer of hope in something and to be engulfed in darkness in the very next second - it kills. so how am i suppose to move on, when he was a large part of something that i found hope and faith in? how could someone so intelligent, witty, funny, filial, and loyal, do such cruel, sick and lowly things?
i can never understand how this world works.
this post is 2 days late
sometimes i think adults are just stressed that’s why when you piss them off they can go on and on for hours, i mean of course sometimes we are the ones who are in the wrong i guess yeah but after that i just forget about most of what they say really. i’ll figure out my own mistakes and change what i think i have to.
also, parents always assume i’m gonna waste my life away working in an office, they want me to work hard so i won’t end up like them and constantly get shit from bosses. well i can always be a freelancer or something right? it will be tough of course but at least i’ll enjoy what i do, and if i become successful that’s a bonus isn’t it?
