[These things apply to any couple, really.]
1. Always talk about your feelings.
Something people forget all the time – your partner can’t read your thoughts.If you’re upset, jealous, scared, or hurt, the only way to let them know is to tell them. Being open doesn’t equal having an argument if you do it properly, so if you are unhappy, talk about it. Tell them; “Something is bothering me, can we talk about it?” This way it’s easier to avoid it getting worse before you blurt out anything you don’t mean.
2. Be open to trusting that your other half has good intentions.
Trust doesn’t have to be about other people coming into the picture, it can be about almost anything. “Did my partner say those things because I did something wrong?”, “Did he/she stop replying because of me?”, “Did my partner they forget about that occasion because it’s not important enough?”. Stop the assuming, and believe that everyone has good intentions. Ask your partner what they meant, or what happened, and stop playing mind games with yourself, they drive you crazy.
3. Be patient with them.
For some people, video chatting & talking out loud is no problem. But, for some, it’s a big deal. Not everyone is comfortable with being on camera, or talking through a phone, or doing both at the same time, and you have to be able to deal with that, as hard as it may be. You need to support your partner through those times, talk about their fears, and let them know that you’re there to help. Ask what you can do to help them, let them know your thoughts on it, and just work together as a team to find something you’re both comfortable with.
4. Be prepared for the distance.
Our bodies can do strange things sometimes, and when you have to leave the person you love more than anything, for an unknown amount of time, expect the unexpected. You might forget how their touch feels for a while. You might not be able to look or think, about anything to do with love. You might feel broken, alone, scared & confused for a little while, and that’s ok. It’s a good sign, this is something important to you, and your body just needs time to adjust – but let your partner know as much as possible.
5. Do more things together.
Schedule a day where you both just sit down, watch a movie, play a game, Skype, or just talk, with no distractions. You’d be making time for each other if you were together in person, so why not do the same through distance? It’s fun, relaxing, and it makes you feel loved. If you’re unsure of what to do, click here, for a list of ideas.
6. Dream about the future.
A lot of people make it clear that, looking past today, is an unhealthy habit, but in some cases it helps a lot. Dream about the day when distance is no longer an issue, where you can wake up in the same bed, and not have to worry about how many days you have left together. Fantasise about the things that excite you, and talk them through with your partner, there’s nothing wrong with being a dreamer.
7. If an argument comes up, call or video message them.
When you’re in a bad place, it’s easy to take words and twist them around. It’s easy to read them in your own voice, to disconnect with them, to imagine the other person screaming, when in reality they’d be talking quietly with their arm around you in person. Obviously, talking through a phone isn’t going to allow them to hug you, but it will bring you back to who they are, and probably calm you down a bit just by hearing their voice. If you can’t call, record a message, or a voicemail, or anything that includes more of you, than just words on a screen.
8. Include each other in your daily activities as much as possible.
Talk, talk, talk. My friends and family often wonder what there is to talk about when I’m texting my girlfriend 24/7, but we talk about everything. How we’re feeling, what we’re doing, what made us laugh, what made us mad, what our friends said about each other, what we had for dinner, our plans for the day, the week, things that inspire us, things that motivate us, anything. If you’re not used to it, it may take some time to get used to, but once you’re doing it, it’s hard to stop.
9. Make sure you tell your other half what they mean to you.
Again, nobody can read your mind unless you talk about it. You can’t tell if your partner is feeling insecure, or scared, and vice versa. Encourage them to tell you when they’re running low on confidence, but in the meantime, let them know how you feel about them. Tell your girlfriend that she looks beautiful, tell your boyfriend he’s handsome. Compliment their clothes, their makeup, anything. Just let them know. Talk about the things you love about each other, and the things that make you weak at the knees, let them know that they make you crazy.
10. Never end a night on a bad note.
This world is pretty unpredictable, and you never know what’s going to happen in the next hour, day, month, etc. Never, ever, ever, leave your partner, when both of you in a bad place. It is the worst feeling for the other person, and the worst feeling for you too if you’re someone who worries a lot. Sort out your issues before you travel, before you sleep, before you do anything that requires a few hours of not talking. You’ll appreciate it once you do.