how to survive thanksgiving:

1. dodge questions about your dating life by shifting the focus to grandma’s drinking problem

2. avoid your family’s racist comments by drinking until your motor skills stop functioning

3. pretend like you know football by emitting a shrill scream every time someone mentions football

4. avoid awkward questions about your future by saying “i have to go to the bathroom” and then spending the entire night there

5. don’t wear a belt. belts are for the weak

6. trick your body into eating more by swallowing your first plate before your brain knows your stomach is full

7. butter

8. dont waste time on vegetables that arent covered in cheese, marshmallows or gravy

9. pretend mayonnaise is suddenly healthy

10. avoid “why didnt you accept my friend request” questions from family by deleting your facebook

11. immediately attach yourself to the dog and say “she needs me” whenever anybody tries to separate you

12. remember that pie-eating is not a competition. it is war.



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Why me, and not my brothers? Renly and his peach. in my dreams I see the juice running from his mouth, the blood from his throat. If he had done his duty by his brother, we would have smashed Lord Tywin. A victory even Robert could be proud of. Robert…” His teeth ground side to side. “He is in my dreams as well. Laughing. Drinking. Boasting. Those were the things he was best at. Those, and fighting. I never bested him at anything. The Lord of Light should have made Robert his champion. Why me?

(requested by anonymous)


Please remember that when you request 4/4 it takes a while longer to do & usually tends to be harder because they’re all centered around the same topic and I have a terrible imagination. But requests are always open :)

Sam: We're the good guys. We - we don't just kill children. (5x06)

Olivia’s story in Ask Jeeves brought up the difficult question: what to do with the children of the monsters that hunters kill? It’s a topic that Supernatural has touched on before, but which has rarely been resolved; and which fits neatly into this season’s themes of choice, consequences, and responsibility. (requested by sweetsamofmine)