That analogy reminds me of a clam I once tried to pry open when I went to the beach with my mother. I tugged and tugged, finally breaking part of its shell. It was then when I fully understood how much clams dislike having their shells broken. I remember it peeking out that tongue like body and looked around, and when it spotted me, it rather lunged. Of course, my chubby legs couldn’t outrun this amazing clam, and it leaped up to chomp on my ear. Quite hard. My mom heard me screaming, and came to pry it off, but even she could not pry it off, so we had to cut our visit short to get the doctor. I had needed a tetanus shot, and the evil clam had to be put to sleep before it could be tugged off. I remember my satisfaction at seeing the needle penetrate it’s fragile, evil body; hearing it’s last breath ‘Youwillpay’
—  I forgot where I found this but it still makes me laugh.
Watch on

@irving_angulo fucking with me while i #sleep #paybackisabitch #youWILLpay #prankswhileasleep #tirado

Don't Cross Me Moment

My moment for today comes from the darkest moment in a dear friends life - and one that I hope I was able to add a bit of a sunshine to. Recently, a close friend of mine convicted of a crime, and will be going to jail. Now, I in no way believe that I have to moral authority to judge anyone for anything that they do, so when people of the small-town that my friend lives in took to Facebook to condemn her for something that they only know the details of through hearsay, I felt I need to add my two cents. So without further ado - my opinion.

"You all have no idea what you are talking about. It is a sad time when the ignorant masses are given a platform to spout their proletarian propaganda. None of you know how she was raised - or what may or may not have happened. So take a moment before you begin your witch hunt to think…think about the fact that you are a terrible person for judging the actions of a woman solely based on one single news story. Think about the fact that some of you did not even know how many kids they had…yet felt you had the moral authority to publicly condemn her. It’s a sad day for the community of Las Cruces, nay - society, that ignorant people are given an opportunity to express their thoughts in such a public manor. Shame on you all who condemn a woman without all the facts - shame! Think about this before you go setting up the gallows…think about trying to be good people - who understand that life is complicated and you will never know the whole story."

Now, as you can imagine, this comment garnered a few reactions - one in which who thought they were smart enough to take me on. Here is his comment: 

"Okay Shanon, we’ll just leave the judgement and condemnation to you since you feel the need to do exactly that to all those expressing an opinion about our legal system. If your opinion is valid and worthy of such a public forum, then so is the opinion of everyone else posting here. I’m having a hard time convincing myself that you’re not being sarcastic actually. Probably just a fruit loop though."

Now, my reply to this is no surprise for those people who know me, but for those of you who are new - welcome to what I will do to anyone who will call me out with no shred of respect. Hope you enjoy…I know I did!

"Oh ******, thank you so very much for proving my exact point, which judging by your complete and utter lack of sense and education, I am not surprised you missed. I will try and dumb down my previous comment so you can hopefully understand what I was pointing out - but I am doubtful because I have a feeling that even at my dumbest it is still lightyears ahead of you. In no way did I condemn anyone for their views on the American legal system, but was in fact pointing out that no one has the right to pass judgement on this woman’s personal life or on the events of what supposedly happened as detailed by two articles in a small-town newspaper that can’t even get the names right - much less the correct details of this story. So, take a moment and think before you post your "rebuttal" - I used quotes because your comment was so far off point that it really can’t even be considered a true rebuttal. So, the next time you decide to throw your two cents in - remember one thing - don’t bite off more than you can chew. And just in case your are not smart enough to understand that euphemism - it means educate yourself before posting what you think is a witty and clever comment. As for the "fruit loop" comment - this above all demonstrates what a benighted person you are…sorry, benighted means "existing in a state of intellectual, moral, or social darkness" - Have a great day!"