So here’s the thing.
It’s not actually the fact that people don’t stay dead in Moffat-land. Well, not completely. Because it’s still possible to have some emotional impact despite the impermanence on of the loss.
But that’s where the problem is, for me. There’s these losses, and sure, alright, they’re temporary…but that doesn’t mean that the emotional fallout should be. There’s always some reason to keep real emotions from being used, real grief being shown. With Rory, he was sucked up by the crack as soon as he died, so Amy promptly forgot him. With Melody, River was revealed to be Melody immediately.
But crying without knowing why isn’t grief, and cruelly leaving a woman to die isn’t either. I wouldn’t have so much of an issue with losses being temporary if there was at least some measure of realism FOR that loss to begin with. People should still be upset, they should still be hurt, they should still be angry and grieving like people do, and there should be SOME long-lasting impact, some measure of mistrust and fear even after the lost ones are returned, because it would be so hard to accept that after being left alone to begin with.
Really, it all comes back to consequences. Not everyone needs to come back, certainly. But even if they do, that shouldn’t mean that no impact is necessary. Honestly, Amy had more of a reaction to not being able to have kids than she did to losing her parents, fiance, and daughter, even if they were all returned to her. And even that was tied up in an episode without any consideration for all the factors that go into deciding to divorce or, then, deciding not to. That’s not as simple as kiss and make up.
If Moffat doesn’t think the psychological ramifications of these events belong in a kid’s show, then he should be examining his choice to include these events, not just ignoring the emotional backlash. Although I still have a feeling it’s more that he just has no idea how to write real emotion. It’s either non-existent in a majority of the characters, or a full on tantrum for the Doctor in a situation that doesn’t really seem to warrant it. There’s no real in between.
I can’t be invested in the characters in Moffat’s era, not only because they never actually die, but because they don’t act like people when they do encounter any sort of trauma. I can’t sympathize with cardboard cutouts and plot devices.