1) Feeling lost today.
2) I’m also feeling a profound sense of loss. I really need to talk to someone, a friend, and be comforted. I was with friends last night, and comforted by silly distraction, but I need to cry on a shoulder.
3) Despite all of that I’m very grateful for another wonderful Christmas with my kids. I’m very very lucky that I don’t have the back and forth issues that so many divorced parents do. It has its drawbacks, for sure. And I will never ever understand his not choosing to be with them more. But times like the holidays are much easier for it.
4) I have to travel with the boy next weekend and no plans are in place save a hotel reservation and a registration. Kids, dog, driving partner…ugh. I need to straighten this out today.
5) I look awful. And that has to change. I know it shouldn’t matter, but I think the reality is it does.