that’s been the main question these past 12 hours after the story was sent to me. there have been so many messages and eye witness accounts, and in this post i’m going to try and compile them all.
the origional story
I would be happy for you to post it… It was terribly disillusioning for a diehard fan of over a decade like myself…
Throughout the show, Conor kept talking about how he represents the working class & Mexican/Hispanics, which I would expect at a Desaparecidos show. He was so avid about it that I got curious about what he does for the causes (the band before his kept talking about all their activism, which I found really inspiring, and I thought that was a great message to put out/example to set).
So, during a break before their last few songs, I asked the guitarist if I could ask a question to the band on stage (I was in the front row). He said sure, and was very nice and friendly/open about it.
So I got boosted up on stage and said (in the mic.), “hey everyone, I am a huge fan and totally agree with the message y’all are putting out, so I would love to know what you are doing to change/help these issues you’re talking about.”
Once I got off stage, Conor flipped out. He began his response by saying, “you’re asking ME what I do??” Over and over, then proceeded to call me a “white girl” and tell me to “sit my white ass down” and check my Instagram account… And (I found this one particularly sad because it showed what a misunderstanding of the working class he had) he said “maybe I play play station all day, but what do you do all day??” (I am a full time student with 2 jobs…) he very aggressively and degradingly continued for a few minutes, then walked over to me (he was onstage, I was off) and spit in my face. Later, when he shook the front row’s hands at the end of his show, he flipped me off instead… He also made comments like “I worked hard for my money, what do you want me to do? Give it to poor people? Feed all of Austin’s poor people??”
I was really upset, so I talked to the other band members, who told me that he spends 90% of his time/money feeding his own ego and “yeah he is kind of a hypocrite, but at least his songs have a good message.”
Needless to say, I was heartbroken. All I wanted was an inspirational answer, or just an answer period… instead I got sexist, defensive hate speak. ):
PS— The other band was called the So So Glos, and they are amazing. The members are all very inspiring and lovely.
This is the ONLY video available that captures any part of the rant that night
Here are people that AGREE with her story
Her account was a little exaggerated, but to be fair I’m sure it was pretty traumatic and humiliating for her. He did spit on her, or at least towards her, although he had been spitting on the stage all night. I don’t know that he flipped her off though. I understand that she was trying to find out what causes Conor is using his money to support, but at the same time it’s an invasion of his privacy to ask what he’s doing with his personal savings.
He did call her a white girl. I heard everything he said and at the beginning of the show he said “everything I say tonight is going to be extremely sarcastic” and basically letting everyone know not to take him too seriously
Here are people that DISAGREE with her story
1. anonymous asked:
Did Conor really spit in that girls face night before last or is she making all of it up
OKAY LET ME ADDRESS THIS
He did NOT spit in her face. If you’ve ever been to The Mohawk you know that their security is strict as FUCK. I was standing less than 5 ft away from Conor Oberst while watching one of the opening bands and I had to act like he didn’t exist because if I would’ve tried to talk to him I would have gotten in trouble. My friend offered Conor a beer and almost got thrown out. Their security doesn’t fuck around. This girl aggressively pile drived her way on stage (when you are NOT allowed to do by ANY means) and started what seemed to be verbally attacking Conor asking him “what do you even do??” and of COURSE Conor took offense to it. Within seconds of her being on stage a member of security had his arms around her keeping her AWAY from Conor at ALL costs. There was no spitting because:
A.) she wasn’t close enough for him to spit on her
B.) he DIDNT SPIT ON HER
Maybe homegirl meant well when she climbed up on stage but the way she got up there and the way she phrased everything made it seem like she was attacking him.
I read her post saying how what he said was sexist and that Desaparecidos told her that Conor is a hypocrite which is total horse shit. Conor DID come back at her telling her to go check her Instagram and he did make that playstation comment but I HIGHLY doubt Desa said those things. Again, security at The Mohawk is no fucking joke. If you’re not in a band you’re not allowed anywhere besides GA. The band wasn’t walking around after the show (to my knowledge) so when would they even have time to say those things to her?
Coming from someone who watched ALL of it go down I can tell you all dear friends, he did not spit on her. Even though she may not have been trying to attack him that’s how Conor took it and he fought back.
The flipping off thing I can’t confirm or deny. I didn’t watch as he was shaking hands with the crowd.
2. anonymous asked:
Listen man, that girl definitely lied about like half that story. Yeah, Conor went on a rant about Instagram, but the rest of that is NOT true. She’s fuckin slandering him and I don’t understand why she would do that
3. anonymous asked:
I was at the show in Austin and I definitely do not remember Conor saying anything other than the Instagram comment he made in the video and it was out of context. I could be wrong which is why I’m anonymous..
I got pushed back by the time that happened. I went from third row to what would probably be considered the 10th so I can’t confirm/deny the spitting/flipping off for sure but the rest is embellished and biased
I was at that show and I can verify he only spit on the ground and not at her. Even if he was trying at this point she was so far away that there’s no way the spit could have hit her
Here is where people thought she changed her story, but it seems like people just read it wrong to be honest..
so it seems like she stuck to the story’s details the whole time.. but shortly after she sent me this message she deleted her account. to me it’s the most damning evidence that at least big parts of the story were fabricated..
and finally, from the so so glos, their version which completely denies any bad mouthing to conor or his actions..
so in the end i think she jumped on stage, didnt realize how her question came off to them, and was given a very hostile and rude response. i dont think he spit in her face. maybe at her or while flipping out on her, but not in her face in place of a smack like it had first seemed.
at any concert alcohol comes into play and can skew our perceptions and change the way we speak to people.
i wish she didnt delete her tumblr, i tried as best as i could to keep her url off my page so she wouldnt get hate mail, but she was commenting and reblogging before i explained to her WHY i was trying to leave her name out of it, and deleted. without her to help address the opposition to her story, there is really no where else to go here. there are no videos or reviews that capture the event, so honestly i feel like no one will ever know for sure.
when the story first came to me, i was on her side more than not. after everything has come out i’m on conor’s side more than not. but again, no one can say for sure what happened.
i think her feelings just got hurt here.
SO OK HE DIDNT SPIT IN HER FACE case closed end of story.