I haven’t had a lot of time to look back on my life or write lately, so I wanted to take this time to talk about somethings.
As I sit in class looking at my drawn-on manikin head waiting to see what we will be doing next, I can’t help but feel blessed to have finally found something that I love, something that I’m becoming very good at, and something that I am more than ecstatic to do for the rest of my life. Sitting in class, the days pass by so slow, but when I look back I can’t help but realize that I have come so far. I am now halfway through my schooling, can you believe that?! I’ve already been through some struggles, but I have kept pushing forward. There have been many times that I felt so inferior to those around me and felt like just throwing in the towel, but then I get my hands in my manikins hair and it just comes naturally to me. This is what I was meant to do, there’s no doubt about it.
Every time I am doing someone’s hair I get nervous. “What if they don’t like it? What if something goes wrong? What if they get mad at me?” runs through my head during the whole process, but I keep on. The look on their face when I’m finished is what I live for. The joy and happiness they express when I’m done makes me ecstatic! Being able to make someone feel good about themselves is a reward all in it’s own. We all deserve to feel beautiful, and that is exactly why I am completely in love with what I am doing.
I know giving up is not an option, not now, not ever. I am so far into this that there is nothing that will stop me. Never in a million years would I have thought this is what I would be doing for the rest of my life, and now, I couldn’t be happier that I made this decision nine months ago. I heard many comments when I became public about my decision. There were so many doubts, there were so many that were disappointed, and of course there were the comments on “that’s not a real job.” But let me tell you, the work, the time, and the dedication it takes to be a cosmetologist is outstanding, and I commend every stylist out there that has gone through this process. So far I had put so much time, sweat, and believe it or not, blood, learning and working to become the best that I can be. So when I feel like throwing in the towel, and I feel too exhausted to keep up, I look down at my arm, “You have many options in life, never make giving up one of them.” and I will take a deep breath, and keep going.
There are going to be days where I’m tired and I don’t feel like doing anything, and there will be days where my own personal struggles could possibly affect the way I work, but one thing is for sure, I will never let anything get in the way of my dream. This is something that I love to do, this is something I was made to do. So many people go to their beauticians instead of a therapist, so in a way I’m still doing something very similar to what I started out. I know I left a full paid four years of college, but honestly, it was so worth it. I’ve never been happier about getting up and going to school (although in the morning I dread getting up early). I’ve never been happier to work towards something I really want. And I can’t wait until the day that I walk across that stage and get my diploma. I can’t wait until the day I get to go take my state board test and become licensed. I just can’t wait for my future.
I wouldn’t be able to do it without my girls, of course. So heres to Tara Hyatt, Tuesdi Thibodeaux, Miranda Yruegas, Casey Tong, and Haley Sawyer for becoming some of my most beloved friends during this point in my life. You guys continuously give me a reason to smile and laugh. We all clicked during the first week so quickly and I am so blessed to be able to call you all my cosmo sisters. Thank you for being there for me and cheering me up when I was down. Thank you for making this journey a little bit easier. I love you.
That’s it for now. Hopefully I will be able to write more very soon. Love you all.