Filipino First Lady Imelda Marcos once “requested” the presence of The Beatles at the presidential palace, but the promoter responsible for booking the gig failed to mention it to the band — which was pretty much the only part of his job. … The day of the lunch, the Beatles watched on their hotel room TV as they utterly failed to show up at the presidential luncheon held in their honor. Presumably wondering all the while why the Filipinos were holding a presidential lunch to honor insects. Later, the band stepped outside, and crowds angry about the perceived snub immediately surrounded their limousines, screaming insults and threatening to overturn the cars. Back at their hotel, the staff refused to serve them, and men in fancy suits and dark sunglasses showed up to extort exorbitant “tax payments.” The Beatles figured they were one suspicious cab driver away from becoming an unsolved mystery, and decided that it was time to get the hell out of dodge. At the airport, the staff again refused to help them. Escalators mysteriously malfunctioned as they approached, slowing their progress as angry crowds surrounded them, wielding clubs and guns. As the band pushed through the mob, roadie Mal Evans was kicked in the ribs and limped to the plane with a bloodied leg. Manager Brian Epstein caught a haymaker to the face and a kick to the crotch. The band’s chauffeur, Alf Bicknell, suffered a broken rib and a cracked spine, which is no dick-kick, but it ain’t exactly a trip to Disney Land, either. Luckily the plane took off with four intact Beatles aboard, but John Lennon vowed that there was only one way he’d ever fly over the Philippines again: "If we go back, it will be with an H-bomb."