I almost kissed bae today.

He drove me home bc I missed my bus and he was headed into my town anyway so he drove me home and I guess he noticed I wasn’t okay (I’ve been feeling very depressed lately) so he asked what was wrong and I just shook my head. A tear trickled down my face though and, in spite of myself, I started to full on sob. I was hysterically ugly crying and I poured my heart out to him and at the end, I was like “I’m so fucking afraid of losing you and it’s so dumb because you’re my fucking teacher and I’m gone in two years anyway. I’m a ticking time bomb as it is and I just want to spend all my time with you, and it bugs me because I doubt you think about me very often and I’m okay with that but it’s so hard for me, you know? I don’t have feelings for you at all but you’re the only one who knows how to make me feel better no matter what I’m going through. I really need you in my life, especially right now, and I’m so fucking terrified of losing you. I’m going through a lot right now so I’m sorry if this made you uncomfortable but I don’t think I can handle losing someone as important as you on top of the shit I’m dealing with anyway. I’m afraid I’m going to scare you and that you are going to leave. I wouldn’t blame you. I just don’t want to fucking lose you”.

And at this point, we were in front of my house and he was like, “Hey, Sydney, stop. Stop crying. You are not going to lose me. Even when you graduate, you will still have me. Always. I’m a phone call, text, or email away. You should know that by now. You will not scare me away. You can push me away all you like but I’m not leaving”. I started to cry again and he lifted my chin up and was like “Don’t do this to yourself. You’re a good kid. I’d never leave you.”

I looked up and noticed that we were very close to each other. I took a chance and grabbed his hand. He didn’t move away. I started to lean in, and again, he didn’t flinch, but I stopped myself. I couldn’t do it. He would hate me. He would lose his job. I love him too much to do that.

Also I felt bad about his wife but they are apparently getting divorced. I feel so bad for him.

Hello TC Community!

I haven’t posted anything during summer because… no school, obviously. And that meant no A… :(

But today was the first day BACK TO SCHOOL in my country so I was thrilled!!!! I loved seeing my friends and stuff but i LOVED seeing A again!! OMG it’s been over 90 days!! He was wearing a superman t-shirt, which I would absolutely love to have… it’s in my bucket list: “to own a superman t-shirt”, I swear!

The most awesome part of the day was this:

I was wearing this band t-shirt I really like (i ADORE the band). I was talking to my friends and laughing and stuff and i realise he’s coming in our direction. I pretend like I don’t notice, until he’s right in front of me. Then he just stares and points at my t-shirt and says:

"you have a THE BLACK CROWES t-shirt!!!"

and I just looked down, nodded and said: “Yup!”

and then he said: “That’s the best band in the world!!” and then turned to my friends: “she knows the best band in the world!!!!!”

and I was just really embarrassed, half smiling, half giggling and he looked so surprised and admired at the same time…

AND I JUST MELTED INSIDE after he went away….


It is hard for decent people to stay angry at someone who has burst into tears, which is why it is often a good idea to burst into tears if a decent person is yelling at you.
—  Lemony Snicket, The Carnivorous Carnival

I always looked forward to high school relationships, like guys asking me to prom and homecoming, and senior year he’d drive me places after he got his license, and we could go out to movies and dinner and do fun things together, and now I’m in high school and I’m in love with my 30-something-year-old married teacher, so you can see how those fantasies worked out for me.

Semptember TCC Challenge 2014!! PLEASE REBLOG!!

As I am aware of, no one made a September TCC Challenge yet so I decided it was my turn to come up with some questions!!

 Please reblog so TCers will have the time to see it. September is coming in few days!! 
Hope you enjoy answering them!! 

1)   Happy autumn guys! Which season do you think your TC would be?

2)      What would you do if another teacher found out about your crush, printed photos of your blog and threatened you they would tell your TC about it? What would they possibly threaten you for? B) If you have more than one TC, how would you react if that teacher was one of your other TCs?

3)      Are there any classmates of you that you suspect they also have a crush on your TC? How would you react if you found out they had a TC blog either?

4)      Do you believe your TC thinks about you? In what way?

5)      How do you imagine your life in 10 years, with and without TC? Give details.

6)      Do you know their family& friends? What do they think of you? What would they and their colleagues think if you two were together?

7)      If you recorded a cd of songs for your TC, what could some titles of the songs included be?

8)      If you and your TC where:
a) storybook characters, which ones would you be?
b) Any characters in a book ever, which would each of you be?

9)      If you had a child with your TC biologically (if you and your TC have the same sex, imagine there’s a way to do so), how would you want it to look like? Which features would you want it to inherit from each of you? What name would you pick for them? How many children would you want to have with them?

10)   Are they more of a logical or an emotional kind of person? What about you?

11)   What is their ideology? Are they liberal or conservative?

12)   Are they religious? You? What are your religions?

13)   What would your 12 years old self think if you time-travelled and told them about your TC?

14)   Do they have a collection of anything?

15)   If they were a color, which one would they be?  

16)   How would you react:
a) If you overheard them saying to someone else (a friend or a colleague) that they’re in love with you?
b) If you found a little flash driver between the pages of the notebook they just returned you after correcting your homework which included a video of them confessing they are in love with you?

17)   What made you start liking your TC?

18)   Imagine you wake up and

a)      You find your TC talking silently to one or both of your parents while holding a cup of coffee and suddenly stop when you walk in the room.
b) You find your TC staring at you.

Why are they there in both cases?  What are they discussing with your parents?

19)   Imagine there’s the 3rd World War going on and you are awakened in the middle of the night by your TC. They tell you that government is after them and they have to hide but they want you to keep an object to remember them no matter what happens. What would this object be?

20)   What’s the most daredevil thing they’ve done?

21)   How does their bedroom look like or how do you think it looks like?

22)   What’s the cutest/most adorable fact about them?

23)   What are your and their biggest flow?

24)   What are your and their biggest talent?

25)   Describe the ideal wedding for you and your tc (who would you invite, where would you go on honeymoon, what would you wear etc )and write your wedding vow

26)   Post a pajamas set/night gown/onesie they would look good in or describe it.

27)   What would you do if you woke up and found out you exchanged bodies? How would it be?

28)   What are your zodiac signs? Do you believe they play any role in your relationship? Do you act any like your zodiac signs? Do they match?

29)   Do you think they would mind of your age gap if you were together?

30)   What’s the sweetest thing they told you or did for you?

Sorry for any grammar or spell mistakes!!!