I would walk up to your office, knock on your door, watch you turn in your chair, speak with you, telling you how much it sucked over summer not being able to talk to you because I was gonna be your student again in the fall and I would apologize for not even saying hi.
I would tell you that I only enrolled in your class because I was mad that you didn’t offer to meet with me one last time before you left the country when I found your office to be unoccupied. I had never made so stupid of a mistake in my life.
I would ask you to meet me for coffee.
I would tell you how sorry I am for awkward things I’ve said to you and also for things I’ve left unsaid.
If we were walking back, as we’re parting, I would hug you. I’ve never done that with you and I want to know how it feels.
If I simply can’t stand it any longer, I’d stop in my tracks and tell you that I’m in love with you. I’ve known it when I realized that I was hurt because I couldn’t see you and say goodbye before summer started.
I’m in love with you.
Whatever your reaction may be, just know that declaring it releases all of the agony that has been building up for months and I will be at peace.
I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you any of this sooner. Please forgive me.
But of course, since I’m anxious and scared, I don’t think these words would slip past my lips.