tai wants so much to be home

for the first time in my life, i physically gave my all to someone and i am so happy it was tay. keeping it quiet doesn’t sound wrong or challenging. i like it. i like that what her and i have is just for us. the way she tells me that i am beautiful is something that i’ve never heard from anyone else before. i actually believe it. when i am with tay, i feel like i am worth something. like i am wanted. i won’t fall in love with her, though. that would ruin everything. so i can shove the brunt of the emotions down and soak up what she gives me. a sense of home. a sense of caring. a sense of something that isn’t quite love but that is so much more than lust. i trust her. i trust her with every single part of my mind, my body and my soul.