stupidstupidstupid

Butting Heads - Nevaeh || Lara

Staring up at the night sky, her head leaned back against the bleacher behind her, Nevaeh watched as a stream of smoke spiralled upwards from her lips. The contrast of the smoke against the velvety night sky was almost beautiful in some off-putting sort of sense. Grungy and gorgeous; exactly her taste. As she tilted her head back up enough to lift the hard-won bottle of firewhiskey to her lips, she tapped off the burnt-up ash from the tip of her cigarette with her other hand, almost systematically. Of course, it was a sort of system, she thought to herself as she lowered the bottle and took another drag off her cigarette. Doing this pretty regularly had allowed her to get a system pretty much down pat. 

She cast her gaze over the dark Quidditch pitch before her as she allowed the combination of the burning remnants of alcohol and the cloud of smoke, scratch at her throat. She hadn’t a damn clue where any of the people she usually deemed worth her time had gotten off to but she was fine. Socialising was good and sex was better, but for the time being, she sought solitude. 

Falling Skies Tag

“Fucking Karen”

“Bitch Karen”

“Whore Karen” (misogynistic much?)

What?

You’re not cute while covered in dead leaves and mud? You can’t lift a bed with superhuman strength? You’re not BFFs with an alien overlord? You can’t wax poetic about sunlight? You can’t cram food in your face like a champ? You can’t disarm Maggie and hurl her into a wall? You can’t make Ben follow you into the wilderness like a lovesick puppy? You can’t make Hal stand by your side despite his better judgement?

You’re not a flawless badass?

Well all I gotta say is

some boys are stupid but girls are stupider for falling for the boys that are stupid instead of the boys that aren’t stupid and then generalizing that all boys are stupid because she decided to stick with only the stupid ones therefore she’s actually the stupid one and needs to stop being so stupid so that she can find a non-stupid boy

watching under the dome makes me frustrated because everyone is so. freaking. STUPID 

like shooting into the air in the dome i mean COME ON DOME MEANS THERE IS A CEILING IDIOT YOUR BULLET WILL RICOCHET YOUR BULLET FUCKING DID RICOCHET UGHHH 

at this rate everyone will be dead by the next few episodes either by accidentally killing themselves or suffocating because the douchenugget reverend thought that matches were an A+ idea god 

I feel so trapped.

Like, I have all these emotions inside of me and I want to go places and see things and feel like nothing really matters. Because, in the end nothing truly matters except for your happiness and whether or not your life is fulfilled. Right? But what does having a fulfilled life mean? All I’m doing with my life is trying to get better at things and trying to make my parents proud of me and quite honestly, it’s all bullshit. I just want to get out. But I don’t know how to do that. 

In this world people, including myself, are so attached to physical things that we can’t just get up and leave. Work, home, school, technology, parents, bosses, shitty friends, shitty relationships, etc. We can’t fucking leave any of it because we don’t know anything besides it. And I want so desperately to be able to let it all go and just wander somewhere. 

I don’t know where I want to go. But I really just want to get away and forget everything.

I honestly don’t think I can take living this life anymore.