it's like my head is exploding.
I hate you. I hate you so much. I hate you because of the way you treat the people who love you so unconditionally. I hate you because you flaunt everything in those who don’t deserve it’s faces. I hate you because you’re blind and stupid. I hate it because you pretend. I hate you because of everything you do and say.
But I hate you most because I don’t hate you at all.
I hate you most because you keep me attached by a thread. The simple thread that you keep pulling to bring me back. Because you won’t cut ties and end it properly. Because you’re a scared little boy.
I hate you because you’re either lying to me about it all, or you’re playing games. Keeping me in arms reach when you’re lonely.
I hate you because I’m at your beck and call. Going to you every fucking time you ask me to. Because I’m scared you’ll do something stupid.
I hate you because you tell me I’m your best friend. But you treat me like one of the girls you keep around at night.
I hate you, because you don’t do anything to make things better. Every reason why we broke up is still there. But we don’t see each other enough to have it shoved in our faces.
I hate you simply because I love you. So unconditionally. But no longer as a lover.
I hate you because you won’t let me move on.
I hate your smile.
I hate your voice.
I hate that thing you do when you touch my face.
I hate your skin.
I hate how I feel like I’m safe beside you.
I hate it when you touch me.
I hate your eyes. And the magnetic currency they hold.
I hate your stories.
I hate your passion.
But that’s how hating someone works isn’t it? You hate someone because the love you feel is so intense. And maybe that person hurt you, or lied or cheated. Or maybe, it’s because the person is so lost and so confused, they reject the love you send. Due to disliking themselves so much. And every time you try to do something to make their day better, they throw it in your face. and you feel that your love you so generously give, is wasted. thrown away. Like it doesn’t matter.
And it gets to the point where, your love is just being ignored. And it burns. It hurts to keep giving. But you can’t stop. To the point where it turns sour. Turns into hate.
So all in all, I don’t hate you. I love you too much.
And that is why I hate you.