speculum

anonymous asked:

When my gyno stuck the clamp into my vagina before inserting my mirena I got the feeling of needing to fart. Have you ever been farted on? I was so worried about farting it made the experience ten times worse. Should I talk to my gyno about it?

When you say “clamp”, I assume that you’re talking about the speculum, right?

The speculum is a metal or plastic tool that is inserted into the vagina in order to hold back the walls of the vaginal canal for the provider to see and potentially take samples from or do a procedure in the cervix.

Below your vaginal canal is the rectum and above it is the urethra and bladder, so its very common for people to feel pressure in both those places once the bills of speculum are opened.  

Y'all know that I worked as a GTA (Gynecological Teaching Associate) for a couple years during midwifery school.  I taught medical, nursing, PA, NP and ND students how to provide comfortable pelvic exams using my own body.  So trust me when I say that I’ve had more pelvic exams than all of you put together.  

Yes, I did fart.  I farted on students and I farted on my coworkers and I’ve farted on practitioners before.  It’s just part of the pelvic exam.

I’ll also add that patients fart on me all the time.  They fart during pelvic exams, they fart during labor, they fart as I’m suturing up their tears after they’ve given birth.  Birth and vaginas are beautiful things, but they’re awfully close to the rectum, and there’s absolutely no way to separate the two.  Trust me, there’s nothing you can do - farting, pooping, peeing - that your provider hasn’t seen already and hasn’t gotten all down the front of their scrubs.

If you’re so worried about this that you can’t handle the anxiety, just make sure that you go to the bathroom right before you leave the house and then again when your provider finally comes in the room.  Just say, “Do you mind if I run to the restroom real quick before we start?”  That’ll take the pressure off a bit (emotionally and physically) and you don’t have to worry too much.

Meblrs, nurblrs midwife-blrs - amirite or amirite??

10

Know Yo’ Self: Radical Autonomous Community Care

I just came back from Texas. Almost two weeks of hanging out with amazing people and Queers making things happen over there. Lots of fun, lots of giggles, lots of femmie time with cute people and also lots of fun werk!

A couple of months ago, Allis(Texana/Fronteriza) from Hojas de Servicio and I were talking about the horrible anti-abortion/anti-people laws being imposed on the people living in Texas. Shit was going down and even if the abortion laws had not passed we thought it was necessary to start focusing on creating a skill share that will encourage people to take their health in their own hands. From there on, we started planning Know Yo’ Self a project which main goal is to encourage the sharing of information. Thanks to all the people that supported the project, we were able to do knowledge shares in San Antonio and Austin, TX. Know Yo’ Self included a bunch of information that I have been collecting for a while and also documenting. The information that I shared came from different places, while some of it came from akkkademia and nerdy research, most of it came from abuelita knowledge, other peoples’ experiences and my own experiences.  My portion of Know Yo’ Self covered abortion laws in Chile, moonstrual education(how to make reusable cloth pads, benefits of moon catching products, tracking the cycle, etc), tips on how to share the information, natural birth control methods, renaming body parts, feminist anatomy, anatomia feminista en espanol, cumbia for uterine health, healthy eating, cervical self-exam, alternative methods of abortion being used around the world (such as misoprostol pills, menstrual extraction, herbal abortion, digital abortion y toda esa vaina), forced sterilizations, herbs I use in my daily health routine (infusiones, vahos, banos de vapor, infused oils, etc), uff and whatever else came out of my mouth. Allis from Hojas de Servicio was also part of the share. She is an AMAZING massage therapist, health educator and community organizer. She facilitated portions of the knowledge shares on uterine and intestinal massage, the impact of diabetes on vaginal health, kombucha making, probiotics and much more! At the same time, we paired up with the incredible Queers, Noreen and Yucca, from The Cicada Collective who came down all the way from Denton. They are also Young Queers of Color donating hella time and love to set up Abortion Doula support in North Texas. You can support their work here! They facilitated portions of the knowledge share as well! They shared with us their experience putting together an Abortion Doula training, important information on un-gendering the birth world, massage/pressure points to support people during abortions and they also facilitated the self-exam portion in the Austin knowledge share.

The main goals I have in mind for Know Yo’ Self:

a) DEMYSTIFY EDUCATION: We do not need degrees or formal training in order to share with our comadres/community about life saving knowledge. It is important to talk from experience and acknowledge our personal experiences as important testimonies of resistance!

b) SHARE KNOWLEDGE & FREE KNOWLEDGE: Encourage people to organize skill shares in their communities

c) PROMOTE COMMUNITY CARE: Re-learning Self-Care as a political tool that goes beyond the ‘self’. I stay healthy, I do self-care rituals so that I can later SHARE self-care knowledge with my community and ensure that we are all as healthy as we can be. Not everybody has the privileged to practice self-care individually.

d) CREATE AUTONOMY: learn, re-learn traditional/abuelita and western practices that help you stay as independent from the allopathic $i$tem as possible. Always being aware that some people(most of us) depend on the allopathic health care system to survive/be able to function and that is completely fine.

In total, 20 people came to the knowledge shares in San Anto and Austin. Jaraneras, Queer Womxn of Color, activists, artists, parejas, friends, Abortion Doulas, Birth Doulas, etc. Some of them are planning on starting self-exam groups, mxnstrual extraction study groups, grupos de auto-examen cervical and other skill shares to keep spreading the knowledge. A group of us are planning to do a tour of the South and West Coast to talk about Reproductive Justice, Holistic Health, Abortion Doulaing, Radical Uterine Health and all that! Stay tuned and let us know if you want to see this happening in yr city next year.

If you were not able to attend the knowledge shares, do not worry! The amazing folx in TX plan to continue doing the work. To connect with them you can contact them here:

Valley. South TX (Sofia P.): snpena87@gmail.com

San Anto (Allis from Hojas de servicio): aozornia@gmail.com

North Texas. Denton. (Yucca & Noreen from the Cicada Collective): cicada.collective.ntx@gmail.com & noreenkhimji@gmail.com & bawestrup@gmail.com

Austin (Lisa S.): eschergen@gmail.com

You can contact me (La Loba Loca) at contact@lalobaloca.com

Together we stay healthy in this unhealthy si$tem.

Are you in Los Angeles, CA? Interested on helping bring an Abortion Doula Collective to train people in Los Angeles? Are you interested on becoming an Abortion Doula? Interested on supporting people through their abortion? 

If you answer is YES. check out AUTONOMOUS COMMUNITIES FOR REPRODUCTIVE AND ABORTION SUPPORT (ACRAS) or send an email to acrascollective@gmail.com. 

-by La Loba Loca. Gay.Queer Peruvian Muxer, tumblerista, body-powered tattooist, D.I.Y. fine artist, Justicia Reproductiva advocate, Abortion Support/Doula in training and over all interested on autonomous health. Check me out at lalobalocaart.tumblr.comand check out my goodies at lalobaloca.bigcartel.com.
TSK: So there's this semi-retired doctor working in my Urgent Care, and it's been MANY years since he last did a female pelvic exam...

Scene: Female Patient is “in the position” (feet in stirrups, nethers exposed); Doctor is seated between her thighs; Nurse is standing nearby with equipment tray.

Nurse *handing speculum to Doctor*: Here you go.

Doctor *stunned by the sight of a clear plastic speculum with built-in light, instead of the old metal torture devices models which require an external light source*: Wow! I’ve never seen one of THESE before!

Patient: *peals of laughter*

Nurse: *chokes on own tongue trying not to giggle*

Doctor: What? What’s so funn- OH! I didn’t mean… I mean… Oh.