god this is way, way too big a question for me, friend-o. this is something i think about a lot. i’m sure there are a lot of really cool trans people who have really solid ideas about how to do so. mostly you should go do some research because i am absolutely certain that other people, especially trans people, can answer this really well.
to me it seems unfeasible to not tell anyone the kid’s sex—i know people occasionally do this, but they get news articles written about them and it draws a lot of attention to the kid, so in the current climate it is probably better to start off with their assigned gender? (just my opinion and not any sort of Authority) and then avoid imposing gender roles as much as possible (toys, clothing, etc.) and talk about gender! which is probably pretty easy if 1+ of the parents is trans, or if there’s a family friend who is trans. like “we call you a boy because a lot of people born with this kind of body are boys, but some people aren’t, just like auntie! and if it turns out you aren’t a boy, that’s great!” or w/e. and even if there’s no one in your life, it’s p easy to explain things to kids anyway? uh. yeah this is all i’ve got. but i think about this a lot. ethical parenting etc.