o man here it comes, The Milkpunk is gonna soliloquize over the Internet, here we go, ok so like, i think the Biggest thing ive done in months is go out to a bar, once, a bar/restaurant cuz alex is only 19, but like, after i sort of walked around, and i mean normally when im alone i wear baggy clothes hat/hood etc and kinda stick to the shadows so nobody really says anything, but i was kind of in a cute/revealing outfit, and SO MANY and i mean SO MANY dudes did that Creepy Thing that dudes do, like, saying “youre too pretty to be out here on your own” like WHY would you say that. i get that sometimes but i got it like a DOZEN times that night. like why would you say that if you werent planning something totally creepy

anonymous asked:

*whispers* soliloqueer

*whispers* puns are amazing send in as many as possible


“Joe Martin Soliloquizes” - A strange magazine column from the point of view of orangutan superstar, Joe Martin.

Moving Picture World, 1919

Also, an assortment of magazine advertisements featuring Joe Martin.


I WILL call my counselor on Monday to make another appointment.

I need to finish my statistics homework by tonight (because realistically, am I going to want to be doing it tomorrow??). 

The human services final WILL cover chapters 14 and 15.

There’s a piano recital to go to that I want to go to this afternoon. 

Albert Cohen, love hero (part.4)

Solal soliloque

“Les autres mettent des semaines et des mois pour arriver à aimer, et à aimer peu, et il leur faut des entretiens et des goûts communs et des cristallisations. Moi ce fut le temps d’un battement de paupières”

I’m frantically trying to get everything packed (how is it even possible that I hAVE this much everything???) and I keep checking under the bed and the desk and coming up like “shit! I forgot all about my plushie oscar wilde! oh that’s where those forks went!” & my roommate (who got everything neatly packed into a few small boxes ages ago) is sitting on their bed killing themself laughing

Episode 260

We start with Loomis, who’s doing housework and counting down the hours to Maggie’s demise. He then begins soliloquizing on how much he wishes he could take a hammer to Barnabas’ skull, only stopping because if that didn’t kill Barnabas he’d be in trouble. 

Loomis brings Maggie some food and milk. At first he insists she drink it, but then warns her off it, saying it’s poison–he wanted Maggie’s death to be easy, but that really should be up to Maggie, so instead he’ll just leave her the milk and let her make up her own mind. She begs him to help her escape, he says no. I’ll miss those little talks. (No I won’t.)

Oh, right, did I mention? I checked Wikipedia and this plotline ends on Monday. We’re almost out of the woods. (Also, starting Monday I’m gonna aim for two posts a day, since I realized at my current rate it’d take me seven years to get through it, and I’d far prefer three and a half.)

Sarah reappears, and Maggie spends god knows how long pleading with her for a way out or at least to tell Sam where she is. Sarah says she’s not supposed to tell anyone the way out, not even her brother, and that she’s not supposed to know about this place. She can give Maggie a riddle to guide her escape, though! And she can only say it once! Dear lord, she’s like a shit NPC in a roleplaying game. Fucking riddles. (Also–hang on, wait, why would Sarah’s parents tell her how to help her dangerous vampire brother escape his prison cell?)

One, two, away they flew. Three, four, by the door. Five, six, count the bricks. Seven, eight, the clue is grate. Nine, ten, home again. 

Better yet, Maggie can only retain the first two words, but Sarah vanishes before Maggie can ask for a do-over. 

After commercial, Sarah’s magically appeared to Sam, who’s pretty unperturbed by this. Unfortunately, she’s friggin’ useless, getting distracted immediately by Sam’s paintings and asking he draw her, and he obliges. They make small talk about her dress and where she’s from until she asks whether Sam has a kid. Sam replies that he does, but that Maggie’s missing, and that he wants to find her.

Here’s where I needed a little finagling from Dark Shadows Wiki–Sarah says that she bets Sam will find Maggie at the beach below Widows’ Hill if he goes tonight, but Sam hasn’t even bothered to look there. Sure enough, it’s because that’s Collinwood property, and everyone who lives there is above suspicion, so. And so Sarah disappears, her purpose as a deus ex machina fulfilled.

Maggie pieces the clues together as Barnabas takes his sweet time getting to her cell. “One two away they flew” means nothing. “Three four by the door” means on the opposite wall from the door, for some reason. “Five six count the bricks” means to count six bricks–why the number is now significant I don’t know–from “seven eight the clue is grate”, the grate over the tiny air vent on the wall. Of course, Sarah never specified in what direction to count the bricks, but it turns out to be “down”, and Maggie presses the brick to open up the secret door in the wall. She leaves, but doesn’t close the door behind her, allowing Barnabas to follow her. “Ha! For once, I get to intrude on their private space uninvited!”

Maggie, ultimately, comes to a room with two doors out, neither of them budging, and with Barnabas close behind…

You can now comment on this post with Disqus!

Excited to be going out Sunday with my friend and her boyfriend, along with Caleb on our very first all together double date! Age of Adeline is supposed to be really good, and I hope all the hype is worth it because I suggested it and then it was general consensus among others, so here’s to my taste in film not letting us down!
Our disposal is still stopped, and I’m pretty sure it’s because the blades are gummed up, but lo and behold, the Nesters are not a readily-equipped-for-kitchen-mishaps kind of people…the L wrench we do have is too small. Now, I’m not one to soliloquize my getting stuck a mason jar in the drain opening, but I can almost guarantee the subsequent accidental crushing by said now-lodged blades would be that reason why, (Caleb thought he was turning on the overhead light above the sink to get a better look, but he flipped the wrong switch). Someone toss me a raft, featuring a cup holder occupied by a collin’s filled with pina colada, hard on the rum…mama needs a quiet escape.

Albert Cohen, love hero (part.1)

Solal soliloque

“Honte de devoir leur amour à ma beauté, mon écoeurante beauté qui fait battre les paupières des chéries… Juliette aurait-elle aimé Roméo si Roméo quatre incisives manquantes, un grand trou noir au milieu?  Non ! Et pourtant il aurait eu exactement la même âme, les mêmes qualités morales ! Alors pourquoi me serinent-elles que ce qui importe c’est l’âme et les qualités morales ?… Et rien ne leur échappe à ces mignonnes ! À la première rencontre, tout en parlant de Saint François d’Assise, elles te détaillent et te jugent. Sans en avoir l’air, elles ont tout repéré… et elles ne se contentent pas d’une inspection du visage… À cette première rencontre, de leur regard angélique et bleu elles t’ont déshabillé sans que tu t’en doutes et sans qu’elles s’en doutent elles-mêmes… Mais se faire aimer est si facile, si déshonorant. Toujours la même vieille stratégie et les mêmes misérables causes, la viande et le social… Des réflexions sur Bach ou sur Kafka sont des mots de passe indicateurs de cette appartenance. D’où les conversations élevées des débuts d’un amour. Il a dit qu’il aime Kafka, alors l’idiote est ravie. Elle croit que c’est parce qu’il est bien intellectuellement. En réalité, c’est parce qu’il est bien socialement. Parler de Kafka, de Proust ou de Bach, c’est du même genre que les bonnes manières à table, que couper le pain avec la main et non avec le couteau, que manger la bouche close”.

“J’enrage d’être aimé pour les machineries animales de virilité qu’elles me forçaient à faire, qu’elles attendaient de moi. Bref d’être aimé pour tout ce qui chez l’odieux coq plaît à la sotte poule”

- pourquoi ce serait vilain? c'est toi qui es vilain! faut être vilain soi-même pour trouver tout vilain (…) même quand il fait beau eh bein tu trouves que le temps il est gris; c'est normal, t'es vieux , tu vas bientôt mourir

(soliloque/ lun. 12:31)