HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH ( obriensnipples ) U NERD

HAVE SOME CHEF!DEREK AND CHEF!STILES

Stiles glares at a crate of avocados.

He reaches out to test another one, squeezing it gently to test for its ripeness, but once again it turns out hard. He’s pretty sure he’s been through three fourths of the crate at this point and all of them are too firm. Really, he should have bought some when he last went shopping to give them time to ripen, but, then again, his cravings can be unpredictable at times. And he really wants fresh guacamole, like, today.

Sighing, he considers abandoning the farmers market and braving the local chain grocery store, but just as he’s reaching out to try one last avocado, someone else’s hand darts out to grab it.

“Hey!” Stiles yelps as his hand is knocked out of the way. He turns his glare on the intruder, losing hold of his anger for a moment as he takes in the man’s broad chest and perfectly groomed stubble.

However, as soon as he sees the avocado skin flex perfectly under the man’s fingers, he just about sees red.

“Oh my god,” he hisses, launching himself at the avocado. “Give me that!”

“What the hell?” the guy replies, jerking his hands away and holding the avocado away from Stiles’ reach. “What the fuck is your problem?”

“I have spent the last hour searching the entire market for a ripe avocado and you just waltz on in and find it on the first try,” Stiles growls, glare still sharp.

“So?” Tall, Dark, and Stubbly asks, unmoved.

“So don’t you think it’s only fair – ” Stiles starts, but Avocado Asshole cuts him off.

“No,” he snorts, placing the avocado in a plastic bag and heading over to the stall owner to pay. “It’s not my fault you suck at finding the best produce.”

“I’m clearly just unlucky!” Stiles shouts at Avocado Asshole’s retreating back, hands curled up into fists at his sides.

He finally finds ripe, but badly bruised, avocados at a mega chain grocery store an hour and a half later. However, it’s only once he gets home that he realizes he forgot to get tomatoes.

Fuck his life.

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