You are not afraid to lengthen your weapons
when the nest of their threats neighbour your pride.
You are allowed to welcome your worth
and praise it like the chief necessity for survival.
In character with the tusks of an elephant,

you will display the ivory that sculpts your strength.
But hunters with an appetite for such force
will slaughter for your teeth,
in order to sculpt their own.

Like the elephant, 

you must fight to survive the hunt.
Because for your tusks they will knock you down.
How hard they will try to knock you down.

—  Alessia Di Cesare, Tusks are a blessing. They are a curse. 

Today my psychologist told me it’s ok to think about my depression as a living entity. I had always thought about it as one, since it spends so much energy trying to keep a space to live in my head. It changes it’s tactics and it lies to get what it wants. To survive.

Today we spoke about how to fight it. And how my need to continuously prove my ‘worth’ is a part of it’s attempt to survive when I am feeling good.

She suggested that I start thinking of a ‘true self’ or a ‘constant self’ that has always been in me, that never changes it’s true form to matter what happens to or around it.  
Her suggestion was to use the sky as a metaphor, but all I could think of was my skeleton. Because you know, it’s IN me.

And so now I’m creating a belief that my skeleton is a presence with a voice like my depression has, except fighting for me. 

And that makes sense.

This morning I received this in my ask box. I responded privately and I have kept the blogger anon on this post.

I was really touched by this message and I know some of my followers are in similar situations so I thought it was important to share this.

To know I have helped someone so much just by sharing my feelings / situation on here is lovely to know.


So many of you have asked for a video, so here is what I came up with. I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted, but this is what I wanted to communicate! Enjoy!

I’ve learned that once you begin to relearn how to love yourself the most amazing thing happens. You’ll begin to notice that the harmful opinions of others begin to mean less and less, until eventually they are nonexistent and it’s beautiful.
—  juslizthoughts
If you are waiting for someone else to reassure you of your worth, isn’t it because you feel as if you need confirmation? Confirmation that you really are good enough. That you really are worthy. That you really are loveable. You feel as if you can finally approve of yourself once they approve of you first. You are looking for an external source of approval. But, doesn’t it make sense to get the approval straight from the one source that matters? Yourself. Love yourself. Approve of yourself. What could be more gratifying then telling yourself you approve of yourself & that you love yourself unconditionally instead of waiting for someone else to approve of you?
If you wait for an external source of love & approval, you will endlessly be searching for it, but if you find your internal source of love, you will never have to search again & no one can ever take it away from you.
—  l.i.u.