if amanda bynes had depression, everyone would be hailing her for being ‘so inspirational’ and ‘lliving with such a tragic illness’

but because she’s schizophrenic, she’s mocked and humiliated by the media and by society for ‘outrageous’ and ‘hilarious’ behaviour she can’t control

this is why it’s dangerous to leave schizophrenia and psychosis out of your disability activism - because people still think it’s okay to say they support people with mental illnesses, but really only mean the mental illnesses they deem ‘normal’ enough to support.

This Is What Developing Acute Schizophrenia Feels Like

A year ago this winter, I began to not recognize myself. 

Sleep was the first thing to change. Progressively, over the course of about two weeks, I began struggling to drift off. As a 24-year-old man with a good supply of hash, this had never been a problem before. It was so odd. Seemingly out of the blue, I’d get into bed at night and not be able to shut off my brain. Thoughts would grow tendrils and loop onto other thoughts, tangling together like a big wall of ivy. Some nights, I’d pull the covers over my head, grab my face hard in my hands, and whisper, “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”

Eventually I would be able to get to sleep, but I’d wake up feeling peculiar, like I had forgotten to do or tell someone something. Hunger wasn’t as aggressive as it usually was during this time, either. Normally I bolt downstairs to pour a heaping bowl of Frosted Flakes the second my eyes open. Instead, I woke each morning with a sick, creeping feeling in my gut. Still, I carried on as normal, thinking I’d just lay off the hash for a bit. That was probably it. I wasn’t panicked. 

I carried on my work at a local wine shop and tried to push what was happening during the night to the back of my mind. I got through the days OK, if slightly bleary-eyed—but looking back now I can see that I had started to struggle with simple conversations. 

If my boss told me to check a delivery, it’d take me a few seconds to process what he was saying, like two or three people had said it at the same time and I couldn’t make out the clear instruction. Looking at morning delivery slips and trying to make sense of them in my head was like trying to make out a tree in the fog—possible, but hard.


Just because I don’t talk
About it anymore
Doesn’t mean I’m better.
I can tell when people get tired of me,
But mental illness isn’t a mood.
I’m not better.
—  m.g.
If the mental illness were persons who representing them
  • Schizophrenia:The voices tell me I have to kill myself
  • Bipolar Disorder:I live happy and depressed at the same time
  • Depression:I'm nothing
  • Intermittent Explosive Disorder:I hate her, i hate him, i hate you, i hate myself, I HATE ALL
  • Selective Mutism:.................... uhh
  • Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:All need to be perfect
  • PTSD:My memories of that incident did not leave me alone
  • Anxiety:I live with concern, angst and fear
  • Dissociative Identity Disorder:I live with different identities in my inside
  • Anorexia:I don't need eat, i need be beautiful
  • Bulimia:I don't like be fat and ugly, i want to be skinny and beautiful
  • Insomnia:I want sleep but I can't
  • Borderline:I feel so confused with myself
  • Avoidant Personality Disorder:I'm afraid of being ridiculed and rejected is why I get away from people
  • Paranoia:Everyone is planning something to make me fall
  • Antisocial Personality Disorder:who fucking need the preset rules
  • Narcissistic Personality Disorder:I am more brilliant, beautiful and successful that you or she o he
  • Dependent Personality Disorder:I need someone for depend on him or her
  • Trichotillomania:I can't stop of pull my hair
  • Dyslexia:When I have to read something, my head starts spinning
  • Asperger Syndrome:I can not understand what is good about interacting with people

Schizophrenia & Dissociative Disorders: Crash Course Psychology #32

Did you know that Schizophrenia and Multiple Personality Disorder aren’t the same thing? Did you know that we don’t call it Multiple Personality Disorder anymore? In this episode of Crash Course Psychology, Hank takes us down the road of some very misunderstood psychological disorders.

Subbable Message

To: Margarete
From: Toni

Your sister thinks you are the best! Here’s hoping Crash Course does an Art History season just for you. :)