we call ships ‘she.’ we call our war machines ‘women.’ we compare women to black widows and vipers. and you’re going to tell me it’s not ‘lady-like’ to scream, to take up space, to fight and demand respect and do whatever the hell I want. you’ve looked at nuclear bombs and been so in awe that you could only name them after women. don’t try to downplay my power.

Tips For Attracting Capricorn

- Don’t pry into their emotions off the top. In other words, save the emotionally charged conversations for later on. Let them get to know you and allow them to figure out their comfort level first.

- Make them laugh, but don’t be corny! They know when you’re trying too hard. Let it be a natural flow between the two of you. So natural, it feels like they’ve known you forever.

- Pay attention to the signs they give off and play on that. If you see they’re into art, take them to an art exhibit or get them a book filled with amazing works of art. They like to know you took heed these kinds of things.

A site by Oxford Dictionaries dedicated to “dying” words that must be experienced to be understood. Adopt a word to save our language, one little red squiggly line at a time.

We’ve adopted:

magistricide (n): the killing of a teacher or master; “To reduce the chances of magistricide, all teachers will be attending the school reunion in bullet proof vests.

Your move, followers.

So, I’m not in this class but I saw this photo floating around on facebook and thought I’d post it to tumblr to try to get Taylor Swift’s attention. Although I’m not a pupil of this teacher (Frankly, I don’t even know who he is), I understand the pain of finals and if I can do something to help a few souls and save them from the painful burning hell that is finals, I will totally help.

So guys let’s share this and get Taylor to see it! And Taylor, if you do see this, please find this man’s number and call him and save these students from the hell of finals. That is all.

therealkayvercetti asked:

And advice for what to say as starter messages on SA? I don't wanna sound like its scripted but i don't wanna leave out my own twist. Is there any templates to help a baby get started for messaging? I'm looking for something h can use universal but add my own spice to it so each SA match feels special. Tracks in advance!!

I get asked this question too many times and I don’t like to answer it because when empirestatesugar ( I miss that chick so much ) was in the bowl she made a masterclass post on it. I tried searching for it on tumblr but not much comes up when you search her name. Luckily I saved this shit in  a word document like a year ago. I used this technique a while ago when I used to be active on SA and so many men pointed out how lovely and personalised my message was. ….Which makes me wonder what kind of message some other people are sending? (100% shade)

 The gold about the template below is when you personalise it to the a PrePOTs profile, he feels special ( he doesn’t realise that you basically sent the same shit to every man you have spoken to)

I’ll state the obvious and say you shouldn’t use this template. Make your own! 

So here it goes. May nobody ask me ‘how to message’ ever again.

All Credit goes to EmpireStateSugar, non of the material below is mine.

“Why I message

Realistically, everyone on these sites is talking with multiple people at once, but as humans we love to feel uniquely noticed. So the two key things I try to remember for an initial spam message are to stroke the ego and elicit interest. You’re doing a really great job with taking initiative but now it’s time to crank up your messages and get the responses you want and deserve, girl!

Think of an initial message like a voicemail. If you get a voicemail saying, “Hey it’s Andy. Call me back.” You’ll be like what does this bitch want? If you get a voicemail saying, “Hey, gorgeous. It’s Andy! Haven’t heard from you in a while. I have the FUNNIEST story to tell you. You’re gonna die. Call me back some time tonight before 10pm or else I’ll be asleep. Can’t wait to hear from you. Bye!” What are the key differences here? The first one lacks motive or reason and has no sense of urgency. You have no idea why Andy called or what he wants. Consequently, it’s not enticing and it’ll either take you hours/days to call Andy back or you’ll text him and say “Hey got your voicemail. What’s up?” You never want a POT to have to ‘What’s Up’ (aka wtf do you want) you! When people write on their profiles “Not a fan of endless emails/texting” THIS IS WHY. Make your point and make sure your point is a good one! The second voicemail not only makes the point but it leaves the receiver begging for more. What’s Andy’s story? I’ve got to hear it! I might even walk out in the middle of class just to call Andy back and hear what he has to say. This is the difference between a green check next to ‘sent messages’ and an inbox full of responses.

When I Message

On SA, there’s a daily quota of how many messages you can send so choose wisely! Winks are unlimited per day, but as I mentioned above, they are the crutch of the lazy and unimaginative. Your words carry much more clout! Rather than wasting messages on men who are too cheap/indecisive to pay for a premium membership, always make sure that the yellow “Premium” is highlighted on the banner on his profile. This way he can actually see, read, and respond to your messages!

How I Message

This might go without saying, but don’t waste your time reaching out to splenda, salt, and meatsuits. Just because BigDickDaddy69lives 10 minutes away from you and has a million dollar income doesn’t mean meeting with him will be worth your time (but if you want a free dinner, go for it girl!). READ THEIR PROFILES. Ctrl + F for “sex”, “kinky”, “stamina”, and other TRIGGER WARNING: TACKY AS FUCK words. If he’s in the clear, move on to extracting tidbits about him that you find interesting – his career, places he’s visited, sports he’s into, activities he loves, etc. Ctrl + T his profile in a tab right next to the message you’re writing for him so that you can refer back to it quickly if need be (I say this because Doctor is technologically challenged and idk you might be too lol). While spamming out your daily email quota should not take more than 30-60 minutes and you are not here to write each individual man an ode, you do want to have some specifics.

Who I message

Assuming I’ve found a premium member who is not a meatsuit, there are two categories that he’ll fall in: Silent Sam and Fun Freddy.

Silent Sam is the standard SA user who, for reasons of extreme discretion, novice sugar profile experience, weak self-selling game, or all three, lacks a well-defined profile. His About Me and About You are brief and vague with phrases like “let’s talk”, “message me for more”, “Handsome, fit, gentleman seeks SB”, “looking for a mutually beneficial arrangement” or other NO DUH type shit. He may have little to no photos, or, worse, have several tailored-suit or beach bod selfie shots thinking that his looks speak for him. He is probably using a vague username like “NYCbanker” or a fake name like “Mike.” Although his hazy wants and needs are frustrating, he is not to be discounted for reasons such as his high income/net worth, high allowance (or it may be open/negotiable but his income is high enough), handsome photos, or ideal location. Thus, I conclude that Silent Sam has the potential to be a good SD and simply needs me to extract this from him.

Fun Freddy, unlike Silent Sam, details his love of Russian ballet and need for an SB who shares it at length on his profile. Indeed, his wants, needs, hobbies, etc. are described explicitly on his About Me and About You which are each a solid one or two paragraphs at least. He may have several photos, or still have little to none for needs of discretion or otherwise. Like Silent Sam, his income/net worth, allowance, and location work well for you but he has a leg up on Sam in that his personality and ideal arrangement align with yours as well.

What I message

(I’ve italicized the template and the rest is just content I scraped from his profile)

Subject: Hey there, (Sam/handsome/nothing if he has no name or photos)! :)

Body: SO jealous that you live in Neptune! It’s a mere four planets away from me so I drive out often for the amazing rock climbing scene. Do you dabble in that at all? Unfortunately there’s not much of that on Earth where I’m from but it’s probably my favorite hobby. Have you ever been to Earth before? As a Management Consultant, I’m sure that you travel to several fun planets and I can tell there’s a ton I’d love to pick your brain about as I too enjoy sight-seeing in various corners of our galaxy. I’ve enjoyed your profile thus far and would love to hear a bit more about you and your ideal arrangement sometime soon.


Kelly Clarkson

^ Silent Sam is more time-consuming to message because you have to pull teeth to fatten up your template. You can’t spew generic compliments like “You’re so handsome!” or “You seem like a fun, active guy” when you have no idea about either. You must rely a bit more on speculation. But this message does a great job of inserting yourself into the narrative of his life. Now he knows that you’re available to meet for coffee in Neptune often. He knows you love to travel and he doesn’t have to feel shy about asking you to join him on his bi-weekly business trips to Pluto. You also shoot him a few questions highlighting your interest in his life and give him action-steps (tell me more about yourself and your arrangement) to steer the conversation where you want to go and to give HIM a template for how to respond. Nothing worse than a message from a guy that says “How are you?” right? Ugh! 
This makes YOU have to do all of the guesswork. Don’t be that guy. Save your busy CEO the trouble and give him three or four key points to come back at you with, which will be helpful as you’re trying to learn more about him in spite of his blank ass profile. Ultimately, this message shows that you’re impressed with him all off of a few words that he wrote down – what an incentive to divulge more!

Subject: Hey there, (Fred/handsome/nothing if he has no name or photos)! :)

Body: I couldn’t help but gush over your profile! Not only are your photos absolutely scrumptious, but you write so eloquently! It’s evident that you are an intelligent, successful, well-traveled gentleman who knows how to have a lot of fun. We definitely share a lot of values and passions in common. I LOVE that you’re a veterinarian – I have two puppies myself. What made you want to study that line of medicine?Your photo line-dancing was very handsome! Have you ever tried salsa before? If not, I’ll simply have to teach you as it is my favorite form of dance :) You seem like you’d be an absolute blast to spend time with and I’d love the chance to find that out for myself. Can’t wait to hear more about you and your ideal arrangement soon!




^ This dude could be the most boring guy in the world but I’m still gonna what? Stroke that ego! I act like his profile blew me away. Best I’ve read since I joined the site. He worked really hard to craft those paragraphs so I reward him accordingly. As Drake says, “I’m telling every girl she’s the one for me, when I ain’t even planning to call.” Make him think that you think that he is the shit! You might be wary of doing so because then he’ll think you’re puddy in his hands, but it really has the opposite effect. These men get dozens of messages that commit the below-mentioned offenses (or are boring like yours lol) and to read from someone passionate, exciting, and lively is a breath of fresh air. Remember the voicemail thing. If you have ten “Hey call me back” voicemails and one enthusiastic, inquiring, fun voicemail, who are you going to call back first? The more interest I show in him, the happier and more inclined to learn about me he will be. Moreover, just like your message to Silent Sam, you’re seeking to insert yourself in the narrative of his life by allowing him to envision you two salsa dancing together. Once you plant this image in his mind, he’ll simply have to make it a reality!


Rapid-fire interrogation into his merits as an SD OR to bring up how much allowance I want.

“Hey there, John! I’ve loved your profile. So tell me, what brings you to SA rather than a more traditional site such as eHarmony? Have you ever been a sugar daddy before? If so how much allowance did she get? And why did it end? Can’t wait to hear back from you!”

^Hey there, SB, you’re hot. Why are you on SA? Do you like older men a lot? The harrier the better? How many older men have you been with? Did you let them do anal? How deep? ………………..Are you uncomfortable yet? This neither strokes the ego nor elicits interest. Instead, I pocket these key questions for the next message or two. Like real dating, sugar dating is about a personality match initially so I start off seeing what we have in common and then (soon, don’t wait forever) move on to see if our arrangement expectations align. As so many SBs say, treat him like a person, not an ATM.

Regurgitating my entire profile.

“Hey there, John! I’m a fun, sexy, college student at University of Tampa who is majoring in psychology. I love to dance, travel, and play with my cats. I keep in shape by running four miles a day and I’m training for my first marathon coming up this summer. Blah. Blah. Blah. Copy and paste from my profile.”

^After a guy reads my message, he will immediately go to your profile to learn more about me. So let’s give him more to learn! Don’t just say everything you’ve already said before. Your profile should do the telling and your message should do the showing. If you say you’re fun, flexible and like to travel – show it! This probably won’t elicit interest since it’s not anything he couldn’t find from just reading your profile. And it certainly doesn’t do anything to stroke the ego since it’s all about you.


“Hey there, John! I’m a fun, sexy, college student who is looking for a man to spend time with two to three times a month for wining & dining, enriching experiences, and a mutual beneficial arrangement with, on my part, a monthly allowance of $5000. Is that YOU? :)” ^ It can be tempting to send the latter message because it seemingly weeds out guys who aren’t what I’m looking for, right? Especially since guys send us these messages all the time a la, “I’m not looking to waste either of our time so here’s what I want yada yada yada.” Well these type of gun to the head messages are a big turn-off to a lot of people (especially shy newbies like Silent Sam); it’s better to start light and then delve into what you’re looking for a message or two later. While this message may elicit some interest, if anything, it hurts the ego by measuring this man against my standards right off the bat. Don’t be a salt baby. Don’t make it “Are you good enough for me? Why should I choose you?” But instead “are we good enough for eachother?” (at least not to his face)

SA winks and literal winks “;)” as they are universally tacky and creepy lol.


Reveal specifically what I find appealing about a man.

Reveal my fun personality to this man.

Enable him to envision the exponential surge in his quality of life with me as his SB.” 

__ empirestatesugar -deactivated :( 

“Save the Words” is a remarkable, interactive Web site that is akin to an online adoption agency—only for vocabulary that has fallen out of usage. Obscure words clamor from behind the interface to draw attention, and entreatingly ask to be adopted, in the voice of a toddler.

I did not have the heart to turn away any.

You’re not happy and it’s killing me
And I know I shouldn’t care but right now I can’t sleep 
I keep thinking about the time you said that you wanted to prove to everyone what a man you are and how successful you’ll be in about five years
But success doesn’t come from getting drunk every Saturday night and making promises to people you can’t keep
Not just the promises, you couldn’t keep the people either
You think ‘I love you’ fixes everything 
But when the world is crumbling to pieces, will those three words save us all?
Or will they only save you from the loneliness that you keep hidden so deep inside your chest that you were almost able to convince yourself it wasn’t even there
I keep thinking that maybe it’s your heart that makes you who you are 
It’s kind of broken and worn out from all of the things that you’ve dealt with
And maybe that’s why you had a hard time believing that one person is enough to love at one time
When you tell me that you want to do better I can’t help but believe you
I know that your heart is good for more than just handing out three meaningless words to anyone you pass by at the wrong time
And one day I hope you realize that you’ve got more to offer than a night of getting wasted and a morning of regret
You’ve got my number and you’ve got my heart
And I’m here for you whenever you fall apart
—  I wrote this for you but I’ll never let you read it