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Rick Santorum Aborts Presidential Campaign from Ashley Judd

10 Things Rick Santorum Has Time to Do Now That He’s Quit

1. Sew the sleeves back on his sweaters.

2. Start a rebuttal campaign against Dan Savage to make “savage” mean “fierce, uncivilized, or rude.” Buy a dictionary. Declare himself successful.

3. Unclench a few muscles, maybe.

4. Finally send Rick Perry that ambiguously flirty email that’s been in his drafts since last June.

5. Pull a series of “Parent Trap”-style pranks to get Church and State back together.

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Pick any other Republican in the country. He is the worst Republican in the country to put up against Barack Obama… [he later clarified] On the issue of health care. That’s what I was talking about, and I was very clear about talking about that… I was talking about Obamacare, and he is the worst because he was the author of Romneycare.
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santrum pls

Rick Santorum’s Stylish Communications Director

Meet Hogan Gidley. Don’t blame him for those sweater vests.

Hogan Gidley bows his head over three egg whites scrambled dry with cheddar cheese and prays. It’s been less than 48 hours since his boss, Rick Santorum, dropped out of the race, and he’s had an intense two days, trekking from South Carolina to Washington to New York back to Washington again; enduring the lack of hot water at his Fairfax hotel; yukking it up with Alex Wagner and Michael Steele at the MSNBC studios in New York; and fielding countless calls from the press. Now he’s sitting at an unfinished wood table in Le Pain Quotidien in Dupont Circle for brunch. If any of this is wearying, it’s not evident in his dress: He is wearing a chambray blue denim Ralph Lauren sport coat, white linen pocket square, monogrammed blue and red striped button down and black silk knot cufflinks; khakis, saddle brown loafers (no socks), also by Ralph Lauren, and a taupe Sea Island cap pulled over his wispy brown hair.

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