Let's have a heart-to-heart, brah.
So, I met this guy online and although I have absolutely the lowest and most suspicious expectations of online dating EVER, I really like him. The problem is that right after I messaged him online, he moved to Iraq. To work for an NGO and help with refugees, etc. Whatever. So we’ve been IMing and I REALLY LIKE HIM. Not sure how to proceed or if I should bother getting invested; he’s there for a year at least. With some vacay. But really? LDR from the get go? Does this seem wise, AT ALL? Thanks.
Things could be worse. You could fall in love with someone from the very near– but very impossible– Future, who owns The Lake House you used to own.
To make a long and very bad story short, they wait for each other, and somehow time makes sense; they sync up, or maybe time was never slow, just part of another dimension. You know how it is. Every once in a while you get access to an alternate reality where you can find the love of your life, if only you wait out fate, even when you’re embarrassing yourself.
Here’s the question, though: if you’re going with your instincts, then why bother being impatient? You can go on some more shitty dates on okcupid, or you can pause and think about what’s so great about this guy in Iraq?
1.) If it’s because he’s inaccessible, maybe take a break from dating and just be single– stress-free single, not having to find someone to access.
2.) If it’s actually his personality, wait it out and see how he feels about you and what his take on the situation is– and if you want to wait it out some more until he comes back, that’s great.
3.) If you don’t know, keep talking until you do know.
In spite of my cynicism, I believe in fairytale endings. I believe that sometimes– once in a blue moon, maybe, or maybe after a Mayan apocalyptic prediction or two– true love wins out over very real obstacles. But how would any of us ever know when our closest friends and even strangers are urging us to “go out and check out the dating scene” and “don’t wait around for Mr. Right”? In a society that dismisses intuition and has traded hope for love with hope for marriage, then why would you wait around for someone overseas?
Because he sounds hot and interesting, that’s why. And because you deserve it.
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