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”Why can’t all the guys just get back together I miss them all so much I just wanna be able to chill with them all the time like we used to”

Out Of Life (Part 2)

Shawn Mendes Imagine

READ PART ONE BEFORE YOU READ THIS ONE ——> http://clarktastic.tumblr.com/post/86026846149/out-of-life

WARNING: THIS MAY BE UNSUITABLE FOR SOME READERS. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION.

AND I AM SORY FOR ANY TEARS YOU MAY SHED.

 

My brain searched itself for an answer as to why Shawn would do such a thing and why all the people who I thought were my friends would lie about it.

I’ve never felt so low and so helpless in my life. The only thing going through my mind was the pain.

It hurt more than words could describe. Heartbreak was something people took for granted. They don’t quite understand it. It’s impossible, actually, to understand something that you’ve never felt before but I sure as hell understood it now. And now that I have, I wished I had never felt it at all.

 I wished I had never met Shawn and fallen in love with him. I could’ve prevented this entire thing. I could’ve stopped this feeling of hurt and humiliation. I wouldn’t have given him all of me and everything I had. I wouldn’t be fixing to do what I was about to do.

The tears never stopped. They just kept rushing out of my eyes like a waterfall. But I didn’t mind. Every tear was a reminder of how stupid I was to love someone who could never love me back. Every tear pushed me further and further to the point of no return. I was going to do this. I was going to end the pain.

My shaking legs carried me quickly to my room as my hands, shaking as well, unlocked the door. I didn’t even bother to close the door. I was too focused on the task at hand.

I reached my suitcase and slung it open, searching for the one answer to my problems. My pain pills.

Scared and afraid, it seemed as if everything had turned to slow motion.

I opened the bottle, pouring a good amount into my hand. I stared at the pills almost as if asking myself if I was absolutely positive I wanted to do this. I wasn’t. But then again, I was absolutely positive Shawn actually loved me. I can’t make the same mistake twice.

I closed my eyes and looked up.

Taking the deepest of breaths, I swallowed each and every one of the pills in my hand before downing them with the vodka I had hidden in my bag for later.

With my vision impaired, my hearing deaf, my senses loosing feeling, I fall against the bed.

Going in and out of consciousness, I stare forward and see the only thing I have ever loved. Shawn.

Shawn’s POV

“Happy 3 Year anniversary, Shawn.” She said, handing me a dozen of roses. In that one moment, my heart shattered. Not from my own pain, but from the pain I had inflicted on her.

She forced a shy smile before making her way through the crowd and out of the room Magcon was being held in.

All eyes left Y/N and fell on me.

The looks on their faces was enough to make me realize what we have done. What I have done.

No one said anything. The fans were just too shocked to say a word. As was I.

Before I knew what was happening, the crowd got smaller and smaller until no one was left. Just me, the guys, Mahogany, and the girl who I should have never been seeing in the first place.

“Guys… Please say something.” I begged quietly.

They all looked at me with nothing but pure sorrow.

“Guys-“

“Save it Shawn.” Aaron spoke. “Y/N is probably the best person on this Earth. She has never done anything to hurt you, to hurt anyone for that matter. I can’t believe you were stupid enough to do this to her and I can’t believe I was stupid enough to help you.”

“Come on, Aaron. Man, don’t be like that-“

“Like what?” he demanded. “I’m sorry but I don’t think I will ever be able to look at you the same again. You have no idea what you just did to that poor girl. She deserves to be loved, Shawn. Not cheated on and humiliated in front of hundreds of people.”

“I do love her!” I say a little louder than expected.

“Really?! Because if you really did love her, you would have never done this. She came here to surprise you because she loves you. Do you not understand that?”

“Do you not understand how hard it is to be in a long distance relationship? Oh, that’s right. You wouldn’t. You don’t have a girlfriend. Hell, you’ve never had a girlfriend. So don’t act like you know how a girl should be treated.” I step closer to him.

“I don’t know how to treat a girl? You were the one who just had you’re tongue shoved down some skanks throat and-“

I didn’t mean to, but it just happened. My fist connecting to his jaw, my body on top of his, and repeating the actions.

It wasn’t until I felt Taylor, Matt, and Sam’s arms around me when I realized what I had just done.

Who am I? Because I am sure as hell not Shawn Mendes anymore.

 

DONT BLAME ME, BLAME YOURSELVES FOR MAKING ME WRITE A PART 2!

ANYWHORE, DO YALL WANT A PART 3 OR NAH

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”…and as cheesy as it sounds, I wouldn’t be where I am right now if it wasn’t for you guys, so once again, thank you so much. I know I’ve said it a million times but I’ll say it a million and one, thank you guys, I love every single one of you” - Matthew Lee Espinosa 

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