A Day Like Today

Woke up. Downstairs to see Alissa and Judah working on alphabet. Bark and growl at Rigdon to get him riled up. Judah and I wrestle. Then watch “Baby Einstein” together.

Go to BMV to get Louisiana license. Weird? Wait 2.5 hours for 2 minutes of work. Sign, pay, snap pic. Rolling!

Windows down as perfect 78 degree wind passes through.

To Izzo’s Illegal Burrito to get veggie fresh salads with cilantro ranch. Smiling, laughing whole time. Full stomachs, alive hearts.

Put Judah down for nap. Wrestle, tickle, cuddle Alissa. Fall asleep for 2 hours. Dream of work. (The heck! Leave me alone on my day off!!!) Wake up more tired than before. Shake it off with a game of Sudoku in bed.

Down stairs to see Alissa playing with Judah. Smile taking it in. Thankful. Blessed.

Lay on floor. Get tackled simultaneously by J-Mac and Rigs. Hit one, hug the other.

Challenged by Alissa to do one of Tim Tebow’s workouts she put together for me. Gulp. “Let’s do it!”

Shirt off, shoes on. Backyard.

Run sprints. Down. Back. Down. Back. Straight to push-ups. Walking lunges. Down. Back. Push-ups. Out of breath. Mouth chalky from protein shake. I blame the protein shake. Alissa shows little compassion. Back to it.

Crab-walk backwards down. Sprint back. Defensive slides. Down, back. Crunches, scissors. Hammies tight. Crying on the inside.

Alissa backs SUV out leaving it in neutral. Judah and Rigs inside with her cheering me on! Push it a half mile around our complex.

Asked if we were broke down by an old lady. Answered NO but should’ve answered YES. Needed help - - even if from a senior citizen.

Push truck home. Fall over. Get tackled by Rigs. Get football dropped on my face by Judah. Thanks family. Feeling supported.

About to puke.

Wash face. Grab deodorant. Off to sunset picnic Alissa has planned for family at “special spot” she found. Sunset perfect as we drive. Everything is… RIGHT.

Pull into undeveloped development. Hidden. No one. Local’s-feel. Right on edge of Lake Pontchartrain. Lay down blanket. Pull out salad, sweet tea, and peanut butter banana cookies. Watch the sun drop in slow motion over the I-10 bridge. Rigdon runs wild as his auburn coat shines brilliantly in the fading sun.

Blare country music from truck. Play football catch with Alissa. Many touchdowns scored!

We pause to watch 20 sailboats launch from the docks. Smile. Dream. Talk. Enjoy.

Drive. Windows locked in standard southern-autumn position. Turn off main roads. Keep talking. Keep driving.

Hons to bed. A few phone calls to people back “home.” Laugh. Catch up. Can’t wait to see them soon.

Hop in bed with Aliss. Read chapter of Tim Tebow’s “Through My Eyes.” Inspired.

Protein shake, turkey sandwich, and popcorn with Alissa. Listen to great music. Look at day’s pics.

Write. Post. Bed.

Thankful.


:: You can follow Brock on Twitter @brock_meyer

Rigdon - My Town

There is a map dot in central Indiana that has as much flash as Dollar General and as much pull as Ross Perot. There is a 4-way stop that demands about as much attention as hunter green. The stop sign is about as irrelevant as Barney Fife’s one bullet kept in his chest pocket. It’s not irrelevant because no one regards it. It’s irrelevant because there are not enough people who live there to merit a stop sign of any kind - - whatsoever! Besides, the folk are nice enough and slowed enough to prefer your turn with a tip of the cap and a wave of the hand. The town is Rigdon. And this is my home.

There used to be 36 homes in Rigdon. I know, because I counted them. Twice. But after the fire at ol’ man Lincoln’s, she is down to 35. Two churches anchor each side of town - - making them an entire two blocks apart - - a Christian Church and a Methodist Church. There’s not much supply because there’s not much demand. There’s not many options because there’s not many opinions.

It’s a simple town. Breakfast at six. Dinner at noon. Supper at five. Its scheduled. Its small. Its safe. I love it.

It’s where the American flag flys proudly on the front porch, front yard, and front of the mind. They’re patriotic. Not because it’s country-cool, but because it’s right. It’s a people who care about war only because they care about peace.

Nearly all my family was raised in them parts. And nearly all of them still live there, raising the next generation with the same Midwestern Worldview. Fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, cousins - - the banner of family values is hung above the door posts, cloaking conversations, and wrapping our kids as they’re tucked in bed each night.

Most people farm for a living. And most others have help at some point in life - - my first paid job spent the summer detasseling corn. The core four of life: God, family, farming, basketball. Strictly in that order. Anything out of balance warrants a gentle “talkin’ to” from your granddaddy (And then he’ll go “shoot buckets” with you to ease the pain).

Renbarger has his own car repair shop. It’s called Renbarger’s Car Repair. It may not win the Most Creative Company Name award, but once he pops your top you’ll see why he’s lasted 40 years in “the biz.” Aaron Young and I used to ride our bikes up and down country roads, with our Huck Finn-esq adventures, occasionally winding up at Renbarger’s to buy a glass-bottled Coca-Cola for $.50.

There’s really no reason you would ever pass through Rigdon. Unless you got lost on your way from here to there. You would quickly realize you got off the beaten path, furiously searching for your GPS to set you straight. However, your Garmin will be of little use seein’ hows Google Earth pays us no mind.

It’s honest. It’s real. It’s really honest.

I’m glad I was raised there.

No Quick-Mart. No picture show. No lights. No camera. No action. You may like it, you may not. She don’t really care. Rigdon will continue on with her boringly consistent self without you. And will be better for it.

Subjects: #S1

Dating has never really worked out for me. It’s never felt natural or really needed (unless I trick myself). As I started the 52 weeks of dating (that failed), I also started up the subject game. The first time I had tried the subject game was Spring 2010 with Subject One (#S1). My workout partner slightly looked like Josh Groban, but I thought my partner was much more attractive. I didn’t feel very comfortable asking if I could get to know him, him being a Senior and oh so cool. So in my dorm room I stuck up a large piece of butcher paper and created a chart. This chart included sections for the date and time we interacted, what headband he was wearing, outfit clinging to his sweat laden body, if we conversed, and if he smiled at me.
By the end of the semester, I had created a technicolor chart that mapped out my interactions with this cute guy. I became closer to the guy who had no idea that I was obsessively documenting our precious elliptical machine time.
Too bad I have a hard time remembering his real name, but he will always be my first try at the subject game.

youtube

On this day in music history: October 16, 1976 - “Disco Duck Pt. 1” by Rick Dees & His Cast Of Idiots hits #1 on the Hot 100 for 1 week. Written by Rick Dees, it is the debut single and biggest hit for the broadcasting legend born Rigdon Osmond Dees III. Born and raised in Memphis, TN, Rick Dees will work days as a DJ at WMPS while spinning records at local night club called Chesterfield’s at night. With the Disco Era nearing its commercial peak in the mid 70’s, Dees will become inspired to write a parody song. He’ll pitch the idea around town for a few months before attracting the interest of Stax Records co-founder Estelle Axton who is running a local record label called Fretone Records. Dees will get his friend Ken Pruitt to provide the signature “Donald Duck” vocals on the track. Released on Fretone in early 1976, the single will begin getting major regional airplay throughout the south, but will not be played by any Memphis radio stations, out of fear of promotioning their competition. Rick Dees himself will be prohibited by his own radio station from playing the record on the air. When he talks about it on the air one morning, the station manager will abruptly fire him, on the grounds that it was a conflict of interest. After the firing, he’ll end up being hired by rival station WHBQ-AM in Memphis. Shortly afterward, Dees will go to Los Angeles to shop the record around to major labels. Al Coury, the head of RSO Records will end up buying the master from Fretone to release it nationally. Once the novelty hit takes hold on radio, it will be a runaway smash. Entering the Hot 100 at #89 on August 14, 1976, it will climb to the top of the chart nine weeks later. “Disco Duck” will also be featured in one scene in the film “Saturday Night Fever”, but will not be actually be featured on the Grammy winning soundtrack album. His management will unwisely decide not to grant permission to allow RSO to use it on the soundtrack. At the same time the record is a huge hit selling over six million copies worldwide (over two million in the US alone), a large groundswell of backlash against the song will develop while it is on the charts. It will often be sited by critics as one of the “worst records of all time”. “Disco Duck Pt. 1” is certified Platinum in the US by the RIAA.

How do you get over  the worst break up of your life? James Rigdon has been there.

They say, “The best way  to get over someone is to get under someone else.”

Having been through a number of relationships in my life, that line has come up more times than I care to remember, and has, I regret to admit, been tried more than once in my recovery attempts.

Guess what?

It didn’t work.

Simply put, hopping into bed with a new person is no replacement for the intimacy and future you thought you had from a past relationship, and, the more serious and lengthy the relationship, the less the effect of going out and hooking up. It’s rather like drinking saltwater after champagne- it’s just no substitute, and does more harm than good.

When guys go through a bad breakup, the usual result is similar to the stages of dying- denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, and to try jumping into something new immediately is exactly like lodging yourself in the denial stage and holding on tight. You are holding on to the desperate reality that the loss wasn’t as bad as you thought, that you are still appealing and worth something to your desired gender, and that your life hasn’t changed as much.

After my first marriage ended abruptly, the first thing I did was rid myself of everything she had ever given me, disposing of every sign of her existence in my world, and trying to act like she was never there. I went out, partied around, and acted like nothing was wrong. After all, I reasoned, since she already had another guy afterward, it couldn’t have mattered that much, it couldn’t have been as important as I’d thought, right?

The trouble was, I had invested a great deal of time and energy, and not a little bit of hope, in that relationship. And, with every night, every party, whether I went home alone or not, I would wake up with the reality that things were not all right. I could forget, for a while, that what was supposed to be forever wasn’t there any more, and I was left waiting for the next thing to distract me from that emptiness. And it wasn’t even that I missed her-  I had ended it, and good riddance!-, it was just that the permanence wasn’t there. What I had was a cheap filler.

◊♦◊

Over the next few months, I spiraled down, until I didn’t even have the confidence to be an effective pick-up artist. I moved into a dorm where, on my floor alone, it was almost 4-1, women to men, and I still couldn’t get any action. I quit trying, and spent the next semester in a sort of depression, wondering what was to become of me, how I’d move on with my life, and why things hadn’t gone right. I was good to her, I supported her, I was everything that society says a husband should be, and we’d dated for over two years prior to getting married; everything said that we should work, so why didn’t we?? Would I ever find something that would work?

A day came- I remember it well- when I finally woke up and realized that life was moving on. I was recovering, albeit slowly, starting to branch out and get life moving forward. I was getting past the misery that had plagued me, and going on with my life, circa year 1 AD (after divorce). This was helped along by a temporary relationship wherein my significant other had made it clear that sex was off the table- I was forced to halt my general short-term solution and find myself again, learn who I was, who I’d become.

And life went on.

The lesson I learned- when you go through a bad breakup, regardless of whose fault it is, you are going to hurt, and no amount of booze or distraction sex is going to fill that void. And even if you did meet the perfect person for you during that time, you would not be in a condition to be the perfect person for them, and it would all be for nothing.

So I’ve made a checklist to go down in order to best recover from a breakup:

It’s all right to be sad.

  • You’ve lost something into which you put time, effort, and emotion. You’d have to be inhuman to not feel some amount of regret. Even if it’s not your fault, even if you ended it for perfectly valid reasons, even if your former partner turned out to be utterly worthless, you’ve still parted from something that was a major part of your life. Don’t try and tell yourself that it’s not that bad; it is, and denying it only makes it that much worse.

Understand what the sadness is.

  • Too often, people associate sadness with the wrong things. No matter how it ended, and with whatever regrets you may carry, your sadness and regret are rooted in the fact that you lost something that was a part of you. But this does not mean you are starting over- you’ve become a new person from the one you were at the beginning, and that person has a whole list of new opportunities the other one didn’t.

Keep yourself occupied.

  • Go to the gym. If you don’t belong to one, join. If you don’t have a gym nearby, find some way to engage in physical activity. One of the biggest dangers of depression after a breakup is letting yourself fall apart, physically and mentally, and physical exercise can greatly prevent both of these. Unlike the usual avoidance activities, working out can make you feel better about yourself, look better, be healthier, and ready for the next step in life. Just beware of doing it for the wrong reasons- “getting them back” or “making them regret losing you” takes away from the good energy and focuses on the bad.

Understand that every day is one more closer to recovery.

  • There will come times when you feel like you’ve not made it anywhere- things will feel just the same as the day before, and the one before that. Guess what? IT’S NOT. Just like taking steps on a hundred mile walk, you might think you haven’t really made progress, but there will come a day when you look up and realize that you’re so much farther along than you were. Just keep your head up and stay on course. And that leads to the final key to getting over a bad breakup:

DON’T HURRY.

  • Imagine you’ve been asleep for a length of time equivalent to the time your relationship lasted. Whether a few months or a few years, if you woke up after that kind of rest, you’d be in a bad way if you thought you could just get up and start living as though nothing happened. Things would’ve changed, life would be different, and it would take a good length of time to settle things back into a workable routine. That’s how your emotions are after the breakup- you need to get your footing back and become a completely emotionally healthy person. Don’t rush it- it’s worth taking the time to get it right. Just like putting a quick fix on a car won’t correct the overall problem, and will eventually require total repair, trying to find the easy way out will just leave you with the same problem; you’ll eventually have to fix it all.

Remember, no matter how good things were during the relationship, and no matter how bad it was at the end, you are still a complete and whole person, and that means you should allow yourself to feel, to think.

And to heal.

Stay strong.

Photo: JoshSemans/Flickr

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The post Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting On With It appeared first on The Good Men Project.

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Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting On With It

How do you get over  the worst break up of your life? James Rigdon has been there.

They say, “The best way  to get over someone is to get under someone else.”

Having been through a number of relationships in my life, that line has come up more times than I care to remember, and has, I regret to admit, been tried more than once in my recovery attempts.

Guess what?

It didn’t work.

Simply put, hopping into bed with a new person is no replacement for the intimacy and future you thought you had from a past relationship, and, the more serious and lengthy the relationship, the less the effect of going out and hooking up. It’s rather like drinking saltwater after champagne- it’s just no substitute, and does more harm than good.

When guys go through a bad breakup, the usual result is similar to the stages of dying- denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, and to try jumping into something new immediately is exactly like lodging yourself in the denial stage and holding on tight. You are holding on to the desperate reality that the loss wasn’t as bad as you thought, that you are still appealing and worth something to your desired gender, and that your life hasn’t changed as much.

After my first marriage ended abruptly, the first thing I did was rid myself of everything she had ever given me, disposing of every sign of her existence in my world, and trying to act like she was never there. I went out, partied around, and acted like nothing was wrong. After all, I reasoned, since she already had another guy afterward, it couldn’t have mattered that much, it couldn’t have been as important as I’d thought, right?

The trouble was, I had invested a great deal of time and energy, and not a little bit of hope, in that relationship. And, with every night, every party, whether I went home alone or not, I would wake up with the reality that things were not all right. I could forget, for a while, that what was supposed to be forever wasn’t there any more, and I was left waiting for the next thing to distract me from that emptiness. And it wasn’t even that I missed her-  I had ended it, and good riddance!-, it was just that the permanence wasn’t there. What I had was a cheap filler.

◊♦◊

Over the next few months, I spiraled down, until I didn’t even have the confidence to be an effective pick-up artist. I moved into a dorm where, on my floor alone, it was almost 4-1, women to men, and I still couldn’t get any action. I quit trying, and spent the next semester in a sort of depression, wondering what was to become of me, how I’d move on with my life, and why things hadn’t gone right. I was good to her, I supported her, I was everything that society says a husband should be, and we’d dated for over two years prior to getting married; everything said that we should work, so why didn’t we?? Would I ever find something that would work?

A day came- I remember it well- when I finally woke up and realized that life was moving on. I was recovering, albeit slowly, starting to branch out and get life moving forward. I was getting past the misery that had plagued me, and going on with my life, circa year 1 AD (after divorce). This was helped along by a temporary relationship wherein my significant other had made it clear that sex was off the table- I was forced to halt my general short-term solution and find myself again, learn who I was, who I’d become.

And life went on.

The lesson I learned- when you go through a bad breakup, regardless of whose fault it is, you are going to hurt, and no amount of booze or distraction sex is going to fill that void. And even if you did meet the perfect person for you during that time, you would not be in a condition to be the perfect person for them, and it would all be for nothing.

So I’ve made a checklist to go down in order to best recover from a breakup:

It’s all right to be sad.

  • You’ve lost something into which you put time, effort, and emotion. You’d have to be inhuman to not feel some amount of regret. Even if it’s not your fault, even if you ended it for perfectly valid reasons, even if your former partner turned out to be utterly worthless, you’ve still parted from something that was a major part of your life. Don’t try and tell yourself that it’s not that bad; it is, and denying it only makes it that much worse.

Understand what the sadness is.

  • Too often, people associate sadness with the wrong things. No matter how it ended, and with whatever regrets you may carry, your sadness and regret are rooted in the fact that you lost something that was a part of you. But this does not mean you are starting over- you’ve become a new person from the one you were at the beginning, and that person has a whole list of new opportunities the other one didn’t.

Keep yourself occupied.

  • Go to the gym. If you don’t belong to one, join. If you don’t have a gym nearby, find some way to engage in physical activity. One of the biggest dangers of depression after a breakup is letting yourself fall apart, physically and mentally, and physical exercise can greatly prevent both of these. Unlike the usual avoidance activities, working out can make you feel better about yourself, look better, be healthier, and ready for the next step in life. Just beware of doing it for the wrong reasons- “getting them back” or “making them regret losing you” takes away from the good energy and focuses on the bad.

Understand that every day is one more closer to recovery.

  • There will come times when you feel like you’ve not made it anywhere- things will feel just the same as the day before, and the one before that. Guess what? IT’S NOT. Just like taking steps on a hundred mile walk, you might think you haven’t really made progress, but there will come a day when you look up and realize that you’re so much farther along than you were. Just keep your head up and stay on course. And that leads to the final key to getting over a bad breakup:

DON’T HURRY.

  • Imagine you’ve been asleep for a length of time equivalent to the time your relationship lasted. Whether a few months or a few years, if you woke up after that kind of rest, you’d be in a bad way if you thought you could just get up and start living as though nothing happened. Things would’ve changed, life would be different, and it would take a good length of time to settle things back into a workable routine. That’s how your emotions are after the breakup- you need to get your footing back and become a completely emotionally healthy person. Don’t rush it- it’s worth taking the time to get it right. Just like putting a quick fix on a car won’t correct the overall problem, and will eventually require total repair, trying to find the easy way out will just leave you with the same problem; you’ll eventually have to fix it all.

Remember, no matter how good things were during the relationship, and no matter how bad it was at the end, you are still a complete and whole person, and that means you should allow yourself to feel, to think.

And to heal.

Stay strong.

Photo: JoshSemans/Flickr

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The post Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting On With It appeared first on The Good Men Project.

climaterhymes said:

Hello! Im the lead guitar player of the Western Sons and we just released our new single "Tennessee My Way". I really like your blog and your perspective on country music. If you could give it a listen and give us a shout out if you like it, that would be amazing. You can find it on spotify or by searching "Tennessee My Way - single" on iTunes! Only if you really do like it though! All the best, -Blake Rigdon

Sure!

Update: District 24

RECENT CRIMES: 4

Theft
Location: 4521 Outer Loop
Date: October 13, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/crime/detail/959757/

Theft
Location: 4803 Outer Loop
Date: October 13, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/crime/detail/959756/

Burglary
Location: 4413 Mullaney Ct
Date: October 12, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/crime/detail/959680/

Theft
Location: 4803 Outer Loop
Date: October 11, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/crime/detail/959738/

RECENT NEWS ARTICLES: 1

Police: Burglary suspects had specific target during crime
Location: 8510 Preston Highway
Date: October 15, 2014
WAVE 3 — An arrest warrant says Thomas C. Rigdon, 27, and Lemuel Bosley, 22, broke into Golden Smoke Shop at 8510 Preston Highway on Aug. 2, 6 and 14. During each of the burglaries the men stole synthetic cannabis, commonly known as spice.
http://www.louiewatch.com/news-articles/detail/959990/

RECENT BUSINESS REVIEWS: 1

Preston Chiropractic & Rehabilitation
Location: 7800-7835 Preston Hwy
Date: October 15, 2014
I have been coming to Presron Chiropractic for several years now. When I first came to Dr. Bianco I could not sleep or sit without pain. After several weeks of therapy and adjustments I could sleep…
http://www.louiewatch.com/business-reviews/detail/960056/

RECENT REAL ESTATE LISTINGS: 1

3600 Hillcross Dr
Location: 3600-3700 Hillcross Dr
Date: October 15, 2014
6560 sqft, 8 baths, mobile home $310,000
http://www.louiewatch.com/real-estate-listings/detail/959775/

RECENT 311 REPORTS: 6

Msd - new construction
Location: 6017 COOPER CHAPEL RD
Date: October 15, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/960013/

High grass, weeds, trees, private property
Location: 8019 WOODBURY DR
Date: October 15, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/959979/

Private property, abandoned, structure, grass, trees
Location: 8017 WOODBURY DR
Date: October 15, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/959977/

Msd - cave in
Location: 5606 LITTLERIDGE DR
Date: October 15, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/959932/

Msd - floodplain determination request
Location: 5910 TOEBBE LN
Date: October 14, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/952134/

Msd - floodplain determination request
Location: 3709 ASTROCRAFT DR
Date: October 14, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/311-reports/detail/952123/

RECENT CONSTRUCTION PERMITS: 7

Rewire Repair Add Wiring
Location: 7007 Billie Ln
Date: October 14, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/950412/

Single System Repair
Location: 5406 Shepherdsville Rd
Date: October 13, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/950980/

Replacement
Location: 8709 Preston Hwy
Date: October 8, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/955093/

Modify
Location: 5406 Shepherdsville Rd
Date: October 8, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/950979/

Rewire Repair Add Wiring
Location: 1131 Okolona Ter
Date: October 6, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/958544/

Rewire Repair Add Wiring
Location: 1131 Okolona Ter
Date: October 6, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/958543/

Rewire Repair Add Wiring
Location: 1131 Okolona Ter
Date: October 6, 2014

http://www.louiewatch.com/construction-permits/detail/958542/

UPCOMING ITEMS: None nearby.

Check the latest news around District 24 at this page:

http://www.louiewatch.com/locations/metro-council-districts/24/

Ms. Jordan’s crazy kindergarten life….around 2 months ago “Bob” vanished….we realized this right as I was being evaluated of course on a lovely Friday afternoon. :) Keep in mind this is already our second hamster (RIP Batman Clover). I thought for sure he was gone….this morning I heard shrieking from the prek classrooms….I thought hmmm it couldn’t be Bob and I saw his little self. I chased him through 3 classrooms before I caught him. Who knows how he survived these past 2 months….I think we are going to write stories on Bob’s adventures…hahahaha
#kdgteacher #myjobisneverdull #BOBlives (at Rigdon Road Elementary School)

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