A thing thatnanda and I were discussing over gaming...
Know what the world needs?
A faux trailer for a dark and gritty reboot of Madeline
(we don’t want this movie, just its trailer).
A woman in a nun’s habit, standing at the top of a staircase, lit by a single candle. She narrows her eyes and says,
“Something is not right.”
She blows out the candle, leaving the screen dark.
Voiceover: In an old house in Paris, all covered with vines -shotgun cocking noise-
-fade in to a pan over a decaying brick house covered in dead ivy. It appears heavily barricaded and fortified-
Voiceover: Lived 12 little girls in two straight lines
-slow pan over a group of girls, all approximately 16, standing in perfect military precision, decked out in all kinds of weaponry, including wooden stakes and bottles of holy water-
Voiceover: They left the house at half past nine
-pan of a grandfather clock in front of a window showing that it’s nighttime-
Voiceover: In rain or shine
-Pouring sleet, giant spotlight cutting through it, shadowy figures skittering out of the beam-
Voiceover: The smallest one was Madeline
-return to the pan from before, but get all the way to the end of the line of girls, where there’s a six-year-old obvious vampire, even more bristling with weapons than any of the others-
::music with electric guitar and heavy cello starts, flashing scenes of vampires being violently dispatched by this team::
(in which there has been some kind of demon/vampire apocalypse in Paris and Miss Clavel has had to turn her school into an academy for slayers. Madeline, being fearless, was an early casualty, but has become a fully sapient demivampire with all the awesome powers that of course entails, which she uses to fight the evil/feral demonpirezombiemonsters)