Laments for the English-Speaking Latina

    Is english your first language?
My only language.
     Where are you from?

I get all the questions
And have none of the culture.
All of the accent,
And none of the language.
I am the Nuyorican, Dominican York,
Native born, Brooklyn.
The Hyper-Americanized Latina 
The Hyper-Pigmented American 
Who can’t talk in her “native tongue”
But still wears her skin brown
And her hair in curls.
I belong to everyone and no one,
Which is the very worst way
To be alone.
I belong to no where.
The one they laugh at when
She tries to speak
And words get tangled on the tongue,
In Spanish,
And English, sometimes too.
Do I pronounce the “h” in this?
I can never remember.
La Gringa.
La Americana.
The one who’s not enough
In any language, 
In any color.
Too white at home.
Too brown everywhere else.
I belong to no one.
I belong to no where.

-Daniella De Jesús

Honestly.. When PoC get to an age where they are able to deeply realize and internalize how intensely and directly racism affects them, as well as able to recognize the little racial microaggressions against them, it truly IS a traumatic experience. Its draining and depressing and painful and scarring. It can very easily make you lose the will to do anything or dream anything. And that is something that whites will never experience, thus never understand how deep this goes.

teetertatter replied to your post: sour-bees asked:Is there any art …

“what the crap are you talking about, you freak.” laughing darkly at what may be the earliest recorded instance of “yes but where are you REALLY from”

Ohhhh my god, you’re right. The analog is actually quite creepy. It’s exactly “you don’t look like what I have decided people I have grouped with you racially and regionally are supposed to look like so explain yourself immediately”.  :|

Once more for those who missed it (I think I messed up the link in the op anyhow:

A stranger in the Mandan village is first struck with the different shades of complexion, and various colors of hair, which he sees in a crowd about him and is at once disposed to exclaim that “these are not Indians.” There are a great many of these people whose complexions appear light. Among the women, particularly, there are many whose skins are almost white; with hazel, gray, and blue eyes.

Why this diversity of complexion I cannot tell, nor can they themselves account for it. Their traditions, so far as I have yet learned them, afford us no information of their having had any knowledge of white men before the visit of Lewis and Clark made to their village …

He apparently thought they were Welsh, basically for no reason. (Clifford/Marcus, p. 57)


PRETTY PLEASE EVERYBODY REBLOG, For those of you who have seen my short film on racial microaggressions, FUTURE CHILDREN, please check out this interview I did on NBC 4 (featuring 2 other lovely ladies from the movie). 


If you have not seen the original film, I will also provide that link.

Watch Future Children

Thanks for all of the support so far and all of the kind words and enlightening feedback <3

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Hey Everyone! My friend directed this documentary on Racial Microaggression in today’s society. It is a funny and light hearted, yet deep and informative film about issues of racism. It is a finalist in the Campus Movie Fest competition and if you could take 5 minutes of your day and watch and share this so that it can get more views, then we would be most grateful. The winners get to go to Hollywood and have their works presented to thousands. Thank you all so much!

when satire becomes the go-to justification for racism and no one realizes what that actually means

this sequence of events is becoming too predictable:

- a person from a place of privilege and media power (let’s say, a white male tv personality named stephen colbert or jimmy kimmel) states something that perpetuates the dehumanization of a marginalized group.

- people from the marginalized group (let’s say, asian americans), who are rightfully fed up with being on the receiving end of constant dehumanization, speak out.

- white people yell SATIRE!!!!, even though it has become all too clear that white people as a whole have yet to move past their racism enough to be able to joke about it in a “progressive” way.

- asian americans call for actions that are perceived as farfetched, oversensitive, and overdramatic.

- white people (and people-of-color-who-want-everyone-to-know-they-are-not-like-those-other-people-of-color) react about how oversensitive these marginalized people are, and many also take this perceived “overreaction” as an opportunity to claim that racism is totally overexaggerated these days. white people love to dictate what kinds of racism they believe marginalized people have a right to feel bad about, never mind that white people have never experienced racism themselves. apparently, appropriate reactions to oppression are always supposed to get rubber-stamped by the oppressor.

- shitty white journalists, such as Erin Gloria Ryan of Jezebel ( ),and Laura Stampler of Time ( ), get really excited for their chance to preach about how oppressed they are by all these irrational and oversensitive people of color, and go way out of their way to justify the actions of whatever white bigot of the day. no surprise, considering the pressing cause of american journalism has always been excusing white people in power for wrongdoing.

what both sides often have in common is a great ability to miss the point.

the joke on the colbert report (not just the following tweet) was wrong, plain and simple. if anything, it clarified how deeply white liberals misunderstand racism and anti-racism.

challenging racism never consists of parroting racist statements against another group, to demonstrate just how racist the other stuff was. colbert gave a platform to harmful racist language that is IN NO WAY in the past. anti-asian slurs are a constant source of violence for asian americans, a reminder of our “place” in this society. part of the humor that the colbert report exploits is the perceived “boldness” and transgressiveness of stephen colbert being able to state plainly racist statements on air. in other words, the joke relies on the fact that this language is still violent and painful for asian americans and they’re going to use it anyway. because at the end of the day, stephen colbert knows he will be protected by the white supremacist society that thrives on the continued marginalization of people of color, in constantly evolving forms. he will rely on his status as a white liberal icon as a permit to exploit the greatest sources of trauma for marginalized people toward the white liberal version of the “common good”.

for satire to be worth anything, it should attack and deconstruct the powerful systems that harm our society. it’s beyond ridiculous when you claim SATIRE whenever you make a joke about a marginalized group because you are effectively claiming that the marginalized group IS the societal problem that you are trying to challenge, which goes back to the point that you are a racist. repeating anti-asian slurs does not challenge racism against native americans, it further emboldens and validates the white supremacist society that allows for our collective dehumanization. comparing anti-native racism to anti-asian racism would only work if racism against asians were actually considered ridiculous, not common and daily aspects of american life.

the violence inherent in these smaller incidents originates from a very long, and still thriving, legacy of white supremacy, which white liberals are too eager to deny. it’s incredible to me that white people actually managed to agree upon language for each non-white group that would signal just how worthless they thought we were. they created common parlance that allowed any white person to wield an entire historical legacy of institutionalized violence and exclusion against us with a single breath. white people do not get to use these triggers for any purpose whatsoever. they have shared no part of our pain, only ever caused and benefited from it. they should do more to recognize the ways they actively benefit from racism, rather than spending all their energies gaslighting people of color and trying to dictate when it’s appropriate for us to feel our pain.

Yesterday, a mixed light skin male friend said he doesn’t like black women. My black friend (darker skin black woman) called him out on it and says her and I are black. Of course he says we’re an exception. He says I don’t count because I’m only half. And he said she doesn’t count because she’s not like them.

We argued a bit with him, jokingly. I mean we all had been drinking and I wasn’t lettin this nonsense ruin my night
but dang that was the epitome of antiblackness/ misogynoir in a mixed light skin POC. I believe he has Black heritage too.

Like being an exception is a compliment?!!?!?!?

Meanwhile someone else was tell us two black women that they don’t like black women’s natural hair. But you still trying to get with us??? Get out.

No honey, you can’t pretend we aren’t grouped in your antiblack women, colorist and probably classist, and respectability bullshit. Sorry, you cannot divide us. We are not pitting ourselves against our women.

— Jay

weebculture said:

my former spanish teacher is a non-latina white woman and she said that if you really wanna learn spanish you should get a job working at taco bell or mcdonalds and i was just like UGH GRINGOS

omygoodness, I am so sorry. I’ve had my share of awful gringa spanish teachers and I think this shows that a lot of whites “love” or “appreciate” other cultures but really have no understanding of how offensive and disgusting they are. - Mod F 

EVERYONE! If you could just take 5 minutes out of your day and watch this film, it would be greatly appreciated. It discusses how racism is still present in our modern society and the issues that deal with that. The video itself is funny and light, but discusses deep topics. If you enjoyed it and learned something, please share! My friend directed this film and I scored it - if we get the most views, we get to go to Hollywood! Watch as many times as you like!! markspants, klarinetplaya, emilyonwishes, thebeardandthebelly, thebeardedmystery

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On occasion I’ll experience a notably awkward/uncomfortable moment with regard to race and culture among white colleagues, associates  and friends. 

Recently I was watching vine vids to destress and my vine is chockful of #blackranked material. Content that’s typically humorous, and culturally belonging to blacks and other people of color. Often content that non-POCs rarely, truly understand. Often it’s humor or language that is deemed ignorant and who’s creativity is grossly overlooked and overshadowed by a mainstream that doesn’t value non-white contributions or understand a non-white experience. Among other reasons, this is because the mainstream media lacks diverse POC stories that are represent real people in proportion to our lives and numbers in the real world. 

There’s an entertainer making his way in the game (as far as I know) thru youtube videos who has a Black Urban take on Mean Girls. It is ratchet, hilarious and incredibly creative, thoughtful and just well-done from start to finish. He and his team are phenomenal! Todrick Hall (toddyrockstar).

I can see that, but many cannot and thus I’m hesitant to share so many cultural things because I know that sharing would have to come along with a lecture from me explaining why this is something of value or similarly explaining why it’s funny in the first place.

In #thevine I get a little respite, a taste of home and I don’t need to explain home to anyone. I can just be….so that’s where this video came from. 

I’m gonna post that Mean Gurlz later today ….it’s MUST WATCH.

I’m A is 4 advocate on vine if you have it :)

<3 PEACE :-*

anonymous said:

can i just say that the thing i hate the most is when people say "oh i speak spanish, burrito, taco, enchilada" because a- that's fucking disrespectful b- I'm argentinian those aren't even part of my country's culture you fuck.

ugh I know, I get that all the time. Sorry that happened to you - Mod F 

black British people do experience racism, talking about racism is not something that you can do easily in England bcs white people here are like in next level denial about racism. white people here genuinely believe that racism in England is a myth, they won’t hear otherwise. Neither will the politicians. Neither will most Londoners. never mind the fact that I have to deal with racial microaggressions every day, the police are extremely racist, we’re just lucky they don’t have guns over here. anti-blackness is rife, even amongst the non black poc population. colorism is just as much of an issue over here and what’s worse is black people here don’t feel able to even mention ‘racism’, to even say ‘I think this is racist’. I find it so hard to say that bcs I know they’ll tell me to shut up. *Everyone* will tell me to shut up. Even most black people here would tell me to shut up if I tried to point out racism. That’s how scared everyone over here is when it comes to addressing the race issues plaguing Britain.

I am 3000% done with the bullshit.

 So, my school has this unofficial confessions FB called Purdue Confessions, where people can post their woes or joys for the entire university to see. Usually, it’s all fun and games, but all too often, shit gets real, in the form of politics, racism, sexism, feminism, etc. Well, today I was 3000% done with the bullshit. In response to some Asian hate, someone posted:



While I applaud them coming to the rescue, I found some flaws in their post. Basically, I felt some type of way and I commented: 


Rather than respond to me and ask a question like a mature adult, they chose to post anonymously (read: passive aggressively) by creating another ‘confession:’


I can’t. I simply replied:


Like I said: I am done. I know you’re not supposed to feed the trolls, but these aren’t trolls. These are ‘everyperson’ types who are prejudicially complimenting you using sexism, racism, bigotry, condescension, and they don’t even know it.

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Try This Instead: Don’t Say the N-Word

White friends won’t stop touching your hair? Is someone telling you you’re not really black or that something wasn’t really racist? Did your co-workers respond to you with “girlfriend?” Racial microaggressions are a part of everyday life for minorities, but do they have to be? Try This Instead, a new satirical web-series from writer/director Cameron Johnson says no. In each episode, we examine a different micro-aggression, and come up with a “solution” on how to avoid it — like sass-avoidance shock collars or just keeping your hands to yourself. New episodes premiere every Tuesday at 11am.

Micro aggression of the day

So I took my cat to get her nails clipped today, and she started trembling from fright towards the end.

Side note: Now we live in a pretty affluent suburb of Dallas which houses a large latino population although not in my suburb. I am used to being mistaken for South Asian or Pakistani because I do not fit the stereotyped image of a Latina. Consequently, lots of blatant racism comes out at me since people think they’re insulted Latinxs and I’m “Indian”.

Anyway, my cat is trembling and I start soothing her in Spanish. The white man doing the clipping overhears me repeating a phrase and asks if that’s her name. I smile and tell him no, and I explain that my cat is bilingual.

He proceeds to say (and I quote) “I had the same problem with my dog. I adopted him from the bad part of town, and for the first few months he only spoke Spanish”

He starts laughing at his story, and he looks up because he expected me to join him.

Needless to say, he got the stink eye and no tip from me.