I remember the time when I told Matty how lucky and blessed
I am to be with such an amazing and beautiful person and he turned around to
say that he is equally blessed with being with such an amazing and beautiful me
and that I made everything better when I came into his life. Beautiful people
exist but they start from the inside and create magic all around them.
I knew the perfect person for me had to be someone that let
me be me no matter how different I was. They’d spend more time understanding me
as a person and not try to convince me that my views, ideas, or beliefs are
wrong. They’d support my dreams and make me want to be better. And that’s the
type of person we all need.
I am truly happy to share my life with such an amazing
person. And this Saturday is going to be an amazing time for both of us.
I also realize that some people will always find a way to put
themselves in your story, whether it be a character, an idea or situation. They
only thrive on the idea that they somehow had in fact inspired you to write or
they will try to convince you why you should just give it up.
I tend to think about times when I was younger and think
back to those who I’ve once looked up to and how devastated it made me feel
when I realized those people weren’t who I thought they were. I realized that I
only knew a tiny facet of that person which in the end became only an illusion.
And that then tends to over shadow the feelings we once had for this person we thought
had all the answers. We’ve all had these moments. And we all felt this pain, a
disappointingly kind of pain when our expectations aren’t met.
Perhaps they made a mistake. Perhaps they weren’t willing to
listen to a problem you needed to tell or the advice they tried to give was not
what you had in mind. Perhaps a person we thought was cool in school made us
realize that we could never be cool enough to be friends with them or maybe
they lied and led you on to make you think they cared.
And we’d think to ourselves why did I look up this person or
people in the first place?
Maybe we loved a celebrity only to turn away from them when
the spotlight dimmed and it revealed a side of them that didn’t make them seem
so glamorous. And you ask yourself why did I ever look up to this person in the
When it comes to these moments, we think only of ourselves
and forget about the people we built up to be proven wrong or knocked off their pedestals.
We have the tendency to build heroes only to knock them down
when their expectations don’t meet ours. We don’t see the imperfections they
could have; only what appears on the outside and when that armor is cracked
even just a tiny bit, our illusion becomes shattered into bits. We know it is
wrong to idealize any human, because all humans do and will make
mistakes. And some of those mistakes no matter how good a person they are can follow them for life especially by those who will constantly define them by these
This made me realize years later, how important it is to
understand what is wrong with this way of thinking and work with ways of changing it.
I always thought what it would be like to be famous one day
or to be perceived as a role model by millions of people and I thought about
what I would say. I would probably start off with this: “The truth is I don’t have the answers, I only have my experiences in
which I feel obligated to share and I believe that we are all important and our
lives shed impact around everyone around us. We can cause chain reactions big
or small, good or bad. It’s up to us which to choose. The best we can do for
ourselves and for others is to stand by our beliefs, appreciate people for who
they are, and offer them help when they need it.
And remember, the most
important thing you could ever do for yourself: is to never let anyone talk you
out of your dreams no matter how big or small they just may be.
Don’t allow anyone’s faulty view of you or your dreams get you down.
Instead use it as a learning experience. Let it teach you how to be a better person.
Show them that life is about working, trying and putting in an effort into reaching goals and dreams. If they put the same amount of energy in creating and editing their own story, in the end they just might have a few of their own best sellers. Never give up on your dreams and always believe in yourself.
We can learn from all people by taking the time to appreciate what they have to say, share our own experiences and guide them to the same places
that we want for ourselves. We can use our confidence in respectful ways.
In the end it
is up to us to be good role models by first working on being our own.”