So my psychiatrist isn’t completely incompetent; I told her that my ability to concentrate was absurdly poor and she didn’t even mention ADD so good on her. She wants me to get blood work to see if she can up my Trileptal without killing me.
I’m a little angry at my therapist, though. This whole “I think you’re bipolar thing” was her idea, and the longer I’m on these meds the more I think that’s completely bullshit. My MO has been depression that’s gotten worse and worse over time. Welbutrin made me manic, and she said that was diagnostically significant in terms of bipolar disorder, but no one else seems to think that. So I’m gonna see if I can just stop these meds and try a different anti-depressant. What a waste of time, treating me for something I don’t even have.
I genuinely like my therapist, We have a good therapy relationship. I’ve known her since I was a teenager. But I might need to start shopping. I’ve asked her to converse with my psychiatrist, who’s one of her “people,” because this mess was totally her idea and I can’t deal with asking when I should stop my current course of “treatment,” I’m not sure how she’s taking it. If you’re angry at your therapist you should be able to tell them, right?
I think I need a more holistic approach. I’m just using chemicals to treat all these individual symptoms and that can’t be healthy.