As awesome as Pokemon are, I’m thankful that they don’t exist in real life, as many of us would have already suffered some kind of horrible death. But there have to be some that are safe enough to make manageable companions in our incredibly normal world. It’s time for a little project. I’m going to find Pokemon that aren’t too hazardous to your well-being and home. That are possible to be cared for by regular pet owners. And I’ll decide whether or not you should keep an Everstone handy to keep your pet from getting too dangerous as they naturally grow a.k.a. level up. Let part one begin!
Let’s start with a Pokemon for the people that love to keep a clean home. With Minccino, you don’t have to put much effort into keeping their areas clean; they do it themselves. They most likely prefer baths on a regular basis. Keep your dirty habits to yourself to avoid making Minccino uncomfortable. In fact, don’t even think about getting this Pokemon if you’re not a tidy person. It will only dislike you more with each passing day. Their moveset is manipulative at best. Attacks such as Baby-Doll Eyes, Tickle, Charm, and Captivate allow them to make you bend to their adorable will. Remember, YOU are the master, not that dusting rodent. They are tolerable of *clean* children, just be wary of their slaphappy tails.
Everstone? - N/A. It needs a Shiny Stone to evolve. Cinccino’s attitude remains fairly similar and their strength can still be controlled. They have gotten skilled with projectiles, however. Bullet Seed and Rock Blast can be a serious problem if your Cinccino always hated you but couldn’t find a violent enough way to express it. Keep it well-groomed so that it won’t get stressed or throw any fits. Don’t worry about strong odor; their oily bodies keep most particles from sticking to their fur. Overall, I say evolving Minccino is an OK in most cases.
Burmy isn’t an active pet, but still a pleasure to keep around. These bugs grow up to eight inches. A tank is recommended to avoid losing track of them, but they will simply find a quiet spot to hang if you allow them to roam free. Burmy are loved by crafty people for their cloaks. You can lay out materials specific to the type of cloak they wear as long as it brings no harm to their bodies. They will wear objects that look completely ridiculous but are still safe while giving you death glares behind your back. If the cloak ever wears down or breaks, help it apply a new one as soon as possible. Although there’s no great risk, they simply become very uncomfortable when they’re naked, kinda like us.
Be sure to keep Burmy with ‘sandy’ cloaks out of damp areas, and ones with ‘plant’ cloaks enjoy plenty of exposure to sunlight. They won’t bite as long as they are handled with care. They’re Hidden Power, however, can be dangerous depending on the type. If it knows the move, call an expert to identify its typing before you end up getting burned or electrocuted.
Everstone? - Yes, especially with males. I know that the females are gorgeous, but their new powers aren’t really worth it. Wormadam are all capable of using Psychic to rearrange your room or yard to their liking. Each one has some unique threats. A trash cloak’s glass-shattering Metal Sound? A plant cloak’s Leaf Storm? A sandy cloak’s Fissure? FISSURE?! Say goodbye to your house, and possibly your life if you’re within range. And unfortunately for the people that loved Burmy for their customizable covers, her cloak has now become permanent, and she’d be grateful if you didn’t mess with it anymore. This might cause some owners to lose interest.
As for Mothim: Hello, Dangerous Movepool! Not only that, but these guys have become pretty cunning and independent. Poison Powder is lethal to you and anything else living around you, and he can swing an Air Slash at an arm, leg, or a neck if he sees you as a nuisance. He’s pretty impossible to keep happy while remaining indoors (he grows up to almost 3 ft. btw). With a newfound hunger for honey from unsuspecting hives, he’d rather set out on his own than be handed food. Do you understand? He doesn’t want to be fed, he wants to hunt.
D’aaawwww. Look at ‘im! Just look at ‘im! With a playful and literally bouncy attitude, Azurill may be the ideal Pokemon for little kids. They’ve got plenty of energy and are easy to keep entertained. Make sure that you have some kind of body of water for them to swim around in; they come from the oceanside and therefore can dry up. While the ball on its tail isn’t heavy, Azurill can put a surprising amount of force into swinging, especially if it has Huge Power. Teach it to play nice around children (and children should return the favor) to avoid any accidents. Your kid will become the laughing stock if it gets a black eye from a handless baby Pokemon.
Everstone? - Recommended for a number of reasons. Marill is still small but much stronger, the oldest ones being capable of learning Superpower and Hydro Pump. That can lead to some child deaths among careless parents. Azumarill ups the ante even more. Don’t forget about that Huge Power.
Another factor is their growing need for an aquatic habitat. Unless you live near a pier or beach or something, your pet is probably sitting in a tub/swimming pool, completely unsatisfied and realizing that there’s more to life than your dry neighborhood. Then comes the depression, leading to high levels of aggression, and then you’re being slammed into a wall by a one of the most powerful fighting-type moves. Rest in peace.
I drew my pets as Pokemon. A dream team, if I may say so!
Lily is electric because she is hyper energetic, and psychic because she compels me to give her attention. And having one eye seeeems like a psychic trait somehow. In my opinion. I think the rest are pretty self-explanitory. My tree might evolve to grass/ghost soon ;_;
Lily is turning out to be one of those cats who comes to me when I call her. (You know…usually.) Especially when I’m across the house from her.
So a few days ago I got her a new new pink cat collar, because her first one, while simple and cute, was just cheap. I understand and like the concept of a break-away collar. But that first one would abort its mission if she so much as rolled over on her back and scooted on the floor a little. I’d put it on and she would take it off within the hour. And I strongly doubt in ANY of those situations was she in any danger of choking. The collar just had a cheap clasp, which is not comforting when the whole purpose of her collar is for ID if she were to ever get outside and get lost.
Exhibit A: An expertly drawn account of true events.
Anyway. So I went shopping the other day and found a sturdier, more durable break-away collar that looks like it will do both its jobs. (Staying on in general, and coming off when it has to. The definition of “has to” is not “When Lily feels like it.” )
It is designed for cats that are 6 pounds or more. Lily, being between her fourth and fifth month of life, is still a little under that weight class. But I tightened it up for her and know she’ll grow into it.
Anyway, in the mean time before I choose and buy an engraved ID tag for her, I found this really cute moon and star charm that came with a Christmas present of mine several years ago. I was sitting on my bed with it in my hand, decided it would be cute on her collar (which hasn’t fallen off once since I put it on her two days ago.) So, I called Lily. Normally she comes darting into the room like a Meowth using Quick Attack. But not this time. I didn’t even hear her bell tinkle, which would be an indication that she was at least moving, possibly even in my general direction. I called again. No response.
Knowing Lily, this immediately raises the question, what trouble is she getting in to now? As I got up to look for her, I pictured her laying on the forbidden dining table, or squaring off against some poisonous bug, or worse– that she did hear me call her, and was outright ignoring me out of anger. (Because I call her into the bedroom when I leave, and that’s where she and Kuma stay while I’m gone.) But I also call her into the bedroom just to give her treats, to counter balance the aforementioned dungeon-doom-room concept.
I found her in the living room, staring intently out the screen door, which she’ll do sometimes for fresh air when the glass door is open. There were no noises outside that could have been captivating her to sit and stare like that. We’re on the top floor so it’s not like she could be face to face with a cat or a dog or any other interesting creature….. except a bird. I looked again and had not even noticed the big gray dove perched on my balcony railing. I was honored that it chose my balcony for its temporary perch. (I love wild birds, you see.)
I didn’t get a photo of my visitor, so I took one from the Internet to make myself feel better.
With me there to “back her up,” Lily started pacing in front of the screen. I could practically hear her brainwaves signalling me something like, “Lemme at ‘em, lemme at 'em!!” I couldn’t help telling her out loud, “Aw it’s just a birdie.” And so the dove heard me, caught one glance of my prowling panther of a cat, and took off cooing softly. Feeling a little bad for scaring the bird, but at the same time happy I got to see it in the first place, I picked Lily up and put the charm on her collar. She darted off to take her adrenaline rush out on one of her toys.
The moral of the story is, sometimes when an obedient pet doesn’t come to you when summoned, they have their reasons. Pets are people too. They’ve got aspirations, even if those aspirations seem short term, like their next round of kibble or how they’re gonna get that bird. If Lily hadn’t lured me out to the balcony door, I wouldn’t have even seen that dove. Did I mention I like birds?