your heart is too soft, and she is setting herself on fire. she calls you her treehouse. the way you feel about her is too small for the building of your body.

your bruised arms are not the branches she perceives. you
are not forest, you are quiet weak.

ivy nerve endings, cities where other people have laid you bare.
you are kept up at night by your father’s foghorn voice and you
are not loud singing, you are blades of grass meeting a ribcage. you shush. you are afraid of long nights, you are
afraid of car doors slamming,
you are afraid that if she looks at your wrapping
she will see that the gift
comes empty.

she is good wine, fireworks, she is picnic blanket and
watermelon, she is a robin and you are flat plains
and too boring for someone who seems so
good at living

she tells you she will come apart like a grenade:
with no warning,

you promise her you’ll stay.

how do you explain that it isn’t a difficult choice?
for so long you’ve been silent
and she is your voice.

—  Boric Acid: part 5/9 in a series // r.i.d

anonymous said:

Can i ask your opinion? Why do you think some fans are so hard on Josh? Some people have left the fandom bc he discussed wanting privacy, bc he has a gf, bc abcdefg but Jen makes very problematic statements and everyone is like oh thats just jen hahaha .. i dont understand its so frustrating! I think for a 21 year old, Josh is pretty amazing! Even if he did things that were bad, hes a human being but he honestly doesnt.

Because they’re stupid as fuck, that’s my opinion.

They’re butthurt and feeling defensive (which means they’re feeling guilty) that they perceive his criticism to be reflective of them, since they know they pry too much into his life. And they criticize his personal life decisions, such as whom he dates, and it’s obvious Josh is upset by this—and instead of reflecting on why this might be, they lash out at him and act like he’s totally unreasonable for expecting some boundaries between him and his fans and that he’s a jerk for basically calling them (and the media) jerks. And these fans are extra salty about his love life because they want him to date Jen OR they have deluded themselves into thinking he could ever date them, or someone like them—i.e., a fan, because then that would give them hope for themselves. It happens all the time with fans and celeb crushes, and even if the fans never think they could actually date Josh, the crush still makes them possessive and jealous toward any other woman the guy dates.

Overall, these fans are just way too invested in his personal life and need to figure out how to take like two giant steps back and reevaluate their life decisions. Josh is the least problematic celebrity I’ve ever seen, honestly, and he certainly doesn’t deserve the level of vitriol and doubt that a lot of his fans are directing at him.

I’m Shabana. My family is Kashmiri and Muslim. Spent a good deal of my life internalizing white supremacy and islamophobia before I realized how fucked up it was. I am sick of being called exotic or people questioning my background or discussing my skin color.  It is because of amazing WOC that I became liberated and embraced my own identity.  I am sick of being boxed into this perceived identity as a Muslim woman. I am not oppressed by my faith nor do I need a white savior to help me. I am sick of also being boxed in by the model minority myth. My parents did not come from a middle class background or have access to a formal education that the “model minority” comes to America with. The model minority myth is erasing the struggles of my people like my parents and there immigration stories

Grateful for this space and all the people out there who continue to inspire and empower <3

Sven Ballenthin’s paintings are probably quickly labeled as erotic or even pornographic because of their motives in the public perception. The staff of his paintings seems to to give at first glance right and often it is young women in lascivious melancholy , languid poses. It is less about the animal such as a driving force that could all too quickly draw the viewers attention he should get involved not realizing it. But rather an illusory superficiality which is the vehicle for the deeper understanding of the existential being.
By the scrape of the selfsame as it leads behind the incitement that seem to promise this curved body healthy .
Since taste presupposes a dominant spectator who dictates what he likes and does not like , and this in , beautiful ‘and’ ugly ’ translated , this one in today’s society understood as universally valid forms - karnon was used by most observers as well is perceived .To create a balance within the painting has been further extended with rather ugly set pieces , so that the eye does not “elektieren” on the naked beauty can do “phallustieren” and forced the contrast of these two diametrically opposite ends of a beauty concept is to contrast them. Also is hereby prevented the provisions adopted it as the viewer to Duchamp :The observer for the ‘victims’ of an ‘aesthetic echoes ’ is standing in a position that is comparable with an amorous man or a believer, which automatically gives up his demanding ego and helpless subjects an enjoyable and mysterious compulsion.
With the help of stereotypical aesthetic- emotional patterns of the viewer researching this upgrade and process the abundance of stimuli acting on it permanently . Also, this venture is to come to failure and ultimately to a standstill so that he completely naked and lost the subject of its consideration equivalent facing themselves and so a more optimal vessel forms around the inner vulnerability and disruption of the figures shown by Ballenthin felt. When he would consider his own being and not a complete stranger to him . Even stranger is that in all of us and even crouching to tie lurking around us.
All of that is taken up in the paintings by Sven Ballenthin to the depths of existence and restlessness to portray describe without speaking. This Ballenthin feels  at a particularly sensitive spot on : in the soul of today’s young desirable women are insecure at the same time disturbing distortion imposed by social behavior patterns and their relationship to their own bodies and their own sexuality and twisted it affects .
The reasons for this are a generally increasing disharmony between inside and outside.
Apparently they shamelessly imitate what is presented to them medially stereotypical lascivious poses and seductive games.
They lose themselves on several levels of meaning , the dismembered in constant restlessness and simultaneous concentration of their self-perception and role identity , and they can always remain incomplete on after the loss of the center is suspected in a community outside of them. So they constantly to transcend between an “I ‘m everything and nothing ” back and forth .This condition is expressed in a seemingly chaotic pattern of apparent dissolution and merger with the empty space surrounding it .Since not only the inner but also the middle way was lost there, no longer find the new composite physical manifestations so right in their proper place , and feeling out of place , fragmented, incomplete and grotesque.
Similarly an identity crisis triggered by the dissolution of time and space boundaries , they float nearly lost their existence and writhe devoured at a breakpoint the ever escapes . There remains for them only the back swing on its own axis at the same time looking for support and to offer .
It is quickly gaining the medial styled and made- over bill the already perceived as poor reality that only works today as a echoaler imitation of virtuality. And thus expresses the desire to please and to be desired , in the strangest bending and contortions of irrwitzigsten.

||Month of October 2014||

Pisces: Strength: This month is going to require that you tap into your inner strength, and make sure you don’t give into temptation. Make sure you allow yourself to overcome obstacles and that you aren’t being your own worst enemy. 

Aquarius: The Star: This month is going to prove to be a little more “dark” than September, but allow yourself to follow the light of the stars and you will be guided to safety, and your intuition will blossom. 

Capricorn: King of Coins: Manage your resources well, Capricorn, and make sure you rule your domain with an honest and fair hand. This month, I would suggest that you look at your “inventory” and figure out what all you have. 

Sagittarius: Ace of Wands: Time for you to let your passions run free, and stop stressing about how others perceive you because of them. Your passions are the reason you are here on this earth, allow them to flourish. 

Scorpio: 10 of Coins: This month, you will have a tendency to hoard your resources, and this is understandable. However, allow yourself to occasionally tap into your resources to enjoy your life, everything you’ve worked so hard for. 

Libra: Six of Cups: Your mind is in the clouds this month, you are craving emotional satisfaction and you are longingly looking towards the future of what you will have with your own version of the term family. 

Virgo: Five of Coins: This month, you need to be willing to reach out and ask for help from others, Virgo, otherwise you may barely make it out of October. You need to allow yourself permission to get assistance from others. 

Leo: Faith: This month, you need to have faith that all things will work out for you, and that you keep YOUR faith burning brightly and with passion. Don’t lose faith in yourself or in others. 

Cancer: The Lovers: This month, you will be forced to make tough decisions, Cancer. You will have to decide between following a logical route or following the route of your heart/emotions. Make sure that whichever path you choose, you don’t look back. 

Gemini: Eight of Swords: You are going to feel entangled by the demands of others, and that you are spreading yourself too thin mentally and emotionally. Time to cut yourself off from those who use you, regroup, and decide what to do with your energy instead of letting others take advantage of you. 

Taurus: King of Cups: You rule your emotions this month, Taurus, and this is going to be a great thing for you. You will be able to use your emotional clarity to make the best of your circumstance and truly grow from what’s been happening. 

Aries: Three of Swords: This month is going to bring you grief and heartbreak, you aren’t going to be able to control this loss and grief, but you will be able to learn and grow from it. You need to make sure to give yourself permission to grieve and feel your emotions. 

hangerkind said:

What factors discern between Ne-Si vs. Si-Ne? How can they be confused with Ni-Se, by the way? I know I use some mixture of Ti-Fe/Fe-Ti, but there are too many contradictory aspects of myself now and when I was younger to understand my perceiving functions.


Ne-Si makes connections easier than Si-Ne does. Like, from a young age, a high-up Ne user will figure stuff out that the Si-dom wouldn’t even notice. This isn’t a slight against the Si-doms, who can usually actually remember people’s names and maybe even where they parked in the lot five minutes ago, but Ne just… reads between the lines.

As a kid, I knew that Alfred Hitchcock movies were sly, sneaky, a bit kinky, and using double innuendos to get past the censors before I knew what sex even was; I just knew more was going on than was obvious, and that something weird and possibly “bad” (to my innocent little naive radar) was happening in the subtext. Subtext I didn’t even understand yet. I accurately guessed that a girl had been molested as a kid, based on a couple of random conversations that happened months apart and seemingly had no relation to one another, but my brain connected the pieces unconsciously. I was right, but it surprised everyone that at ten years old, I knew this from her parents not letting other siblings go on sleep-overs and being over-protective, and other things.

Now, in fairness, I know a Si-dom (ISTJ) who has an insane use of Ne. She can predict stuff better than I can and I think it’s because she has so much information and personal experiences stored in her head (Si) that her brain subconsciously connects pieces of information, weighs them against similar things that have happened in the past, and trusts that history will repeat itself. And a lot of the time, it does. It’s very much a Si-dominant Ne process, but I suspect it needs stuff to “connect to” in the first place (which, of course, being a Si-Te, she has because it’s all about BOOKS and LEARNING and USING STUFF), whereas mine doesn’t always need former references and instead, will go looking for validation on theories that come out of nowhere.

So I guess the primary difference is — Ne-Si makes crap up that is often right, but then goes looking for proof of it; Si-Ne knows the truth from previous experience.

Not sure how anyone could confuse Si-dom for Ni-dom, because Si-doms are all about concretes and details and repetition and handling the everyday essentials inside a comfortable, reliable routine, whereas Ni-doms are all about big picture visualization and new concepts, and pooh on routine (routine is boring!!), while steadily working toward implementing their inner vision in some way; but I can see how Ni can get confused for Ne, because they both do the same thing in some regards (predictions, “knowing things,” etc), while being very different. Ni-doms, as I have said repeatedly over the last few days, are very much into in-depth symbolism and visualization. Ni goes deep. Really deep into a topic. Deeper than anyone else anticipates, and then it goes back for more. It will be content to re-examine something it values for decades, because there is always another layer of truth to unearth.

Ne is not like this. Ne gets bored with something it has already figured out, and wants to find something new to learn and focus on for awhile. Let’s say that Ni and Ne are both into The Lord of the Rings. Ni will go back, again and again, finding something new and exciting in the series each time. The obsession lasts decades, if not their entire life. Now, the Ne user gets obsessed for awhile, tears it apart, reads the books, watches the movies, discusses it from every angle and… are done.* They will revisit the series now and again, but never with the same level of ferocity and intensity, because in their mind, they understand it, they have seen it, they have explored it, and there probably isn’t any new angle left to discover. It’s an old passion, not dormant but waiting for a new tidbit to add to their knowledge base. Until that arrives, and sheds an entirely new light on Middle-earth, it’s an old hobby like so many, that has a special place in their heart but no longer holds their intense focus. Been there, done that, what’s next?

Of course, Ni has Se, which is factual retention and memories, but without the desire for routine and tendency to relive emotional experiences of Si. So INXJs will not fall into a melancholic memory rut in the way that Si-users of any kind do; Si is subjective memory, influenced by personal values and opinions, but also brings with it access to those same feelings it had when the incident happened. Se is objective, impartial memory retention, which allows Ni to evade the emotional baggage. It wants new experiences merely for the experience itself, whereas Si wants to hold on, in some respects, to the past and routine for its own comfort and state of mind.

* True story. Me and my NJ friends. Heh.

ETA: I should probably mention that Si-doms love LotR too, and will return to it, but their enjoyment is different from Ni. They’re reliving something they loved, and have subsequently loved ever since; each time they watch it, it is solidified in their minds as “awesome.” Si brings back a host of memories of previous experiences watching it, and… you guessed it, the same emotions revisit them each time.

That’s probably why I get so irritated by people who react to the church’s targeting and firing of LGBT Catholics and allies with a shrug, a sneer, or a dismissive, self-righteous comment like “what did they expect?”. Unless you’ve gone through it yourself, you have no idea what a shattering, life-altering, demoralizing, and humiliating experience it is. “What did they expect?” is victim-blaming, pure and simple, and the absolute worst way to respond when a person is suffering.

Just as maddening as “what did they expect?” is the other response that people always seem to have to the gay Catholic musician, lesbian Catholic school teacher, or church worker with an LGBT child: “why do they belong to an organization that hates them?” This response is completely masturbatory: it makes the person saying it feel good about themselves for what they perceive to be their superior state of enlightenment, but doesn’t actually accomplish much else.

Instead of acknowledging the victim’s unjust suffering and offering sympathy and support, this response shames them for being in a spiritual place that’s different from one’s own. It’s also profoundly unhelpful, unless one believes that only certain LGBT people, in certain religious communities and faith traditions, deserve justice and basic human dignity.

In the ordinary mind, we perceive the stream of thoughts as continuous, but in reality this is not the case. You will discover for yourself that there is a gap between each thought. When the past thought is past, and the future thought has not yet arisen, you will always find a gap in which the Rigpa, the nature of mind, is revealed. So the work of meditation is to allow thoughts to slow down, to make that gap become more and more apparent. —Sogyal Rinpoche _Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, 
Steak Knives and Eyeballs

When the early-twenties-something guy at the dinner party says he doesn’t worry about HIV because it’s only a chronic disease now, like diabetes, that can be managed with medication, I ask myself, “Do I have anger management issues because I want to take my steak knife and gouge out his eyeball or do I not have anger management issues because I successfully resisted the urge to take my steak knife and gouge out his eyeball?”

I’m not here to judge or preach but I do wish you’d just be honest and say your perceived advantages of unprotected sex outweigh your perceived risks of contracting HIV.

And, yes, there are plenty of legitimate reasons for having unprotected sex. Not to mention, given the number of unwanted and unplanned pregnancies, as well as their own STI rates, the straight community grapples with the issue of unprotected sex, too, so it’s not unique to LGBTQ folks.

But, to say HIV is analogous to diabetes is a lie (it’s a complicated, expensive disease to fight) and a huge slap in the face to all the wonderful friends and acquaintances that I lost. These were wonderful people who deserved the knowledge about HIV infection that we have today, as well as, access to the new, incredible life-lengthening, improving, and changing meds that we now have.

Please don’t tarnish their memory by suggesting that diabetes and HIV are equals. My friends’ lives were worth the hassle of gouging out your eyeball.

There are no conditions to fulfill. There is nothing to be done, nothing to be given up. Just look and remember, whatever you perceive is not you, nor yours. It is there in the field of consciousness, but you are not the field and its contents, nor even the knower of the field. It is your idea that you have to do things that entangle you in the results of your efforts—the motive, the desire, the failure to achieve, the sense of frustration—all this holds you back. Simply look at whatever happens and know that you are beyond it.
—  Nisargadatta
Stillness is your essential nature. What is stillness? The inner space or awareness in which the words on this page are bieng perceived and become thoughts. Without that awareness, there would be no perception, no thoughts, no world. You are that awareness, disguised as a person.
—  Eckhart Tolle

its so strange how people perceive u like…. i am a very passionate person i think, but most of my friends don’t observe that.. they see me as quite nonchalant? very bad at expressing myself but i promise there is more to me than: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’ll join the bandwagon too hmm?

I’m Morgan and all my favourite ship are crack ones. I’m mostly neutral about the ‘popular’ ships.

I’m Morgan and I don’t diss other peoples ships.

I’m Morgan and I don’t compare people’s rp portrayals

I’m Morgan and if I don’t agree with someone’s headcanon or the way they perceive a certain character, I don’t argue with them, I keep my mouth shut, because thats their opinion

art credits: X

The knife Shingetsu held in his hand was not just a mere object, but what he perceived as an extension of himself; an extension of his rage which had festered far too long inside him to be contained anymore. The knife felt good in his hands, felt complete—and even more so to use it. Again, and again, and again, and again, andagianandagainandagainandagain—until exhaustion’s weight was too heavy for the child to bear.  

He stared down at the gristly sight that collected at his feet, almost as if admiring artwork; the eviscerated corpse of the once proud, over-bearing Mr. Shingetsu, now unrecognizable and in a sea of his own blood. Dead. 

His source of pain, his source of fear, his source of hatred—dead.

And, he smiled. For the first time in years—Shingetsu felt himself smile. 

I relate to villains and side-kicks because I relate to feeling perceived as a liability or a burden.
I relate to being able to rationalize my side of the story, but never able to truly justify it.
And I relate to not “redeeming” myself because I don’t agree with the hero’s judgement and philosophy, but I also see how that may lead to my ultimate downfall.
I relate to “villainous breakdowns”, because I wonder if I will also abandon everything that I stubbornly stood by when my ruin is self-evident. Will I throw away my standards as they do? Are they standards that can be thrown away, or will I go down with them?
I relate to villains because I am particular, and I won’t give up my particularities for the sake of being practical. The fine line between a villain and a hero is that a hero’s unbreakable standards are ultimately condoned by something outside of themselves (the narrative, the community, the audience), but the only one who condones the villain’s pickiness is themselves and yet they keep doing them anyway. I just do my thing. I don’t know if it’s right or wrong and frankly it doesn’t seem to matter because for me, my principles aren’t up for debate - I will not change them until I see fit to do so, and never before.