I finally presented in my British Lit class today. I had to give a 10 minute presentation on Edmund Spenser’s, The Shepheardes Calender. I volunteered to go first on the 10th of this month, and not for an hour have I stopped thinking about it since then. Last night I was so anxious I couldn’t fall asleep until 5, and I was up at 8, an hour before my alarm. I couldn’t eat breakfast. I cried on my way to school. I dry heaved in the bathroom for 20 minutes before class. A few of my friends were assuring me that I’d be great. “Don’t worry! He’ll be easy on you! You volunteered!!” AND LIKE THAT’S NOT THE PROBLEM. I don’t care about my grade. I need to focus on not collapsing right now, thanx. I got up there with my Powerpoint clicker and my 8 page essay in my push up bra and black long sleeve v-neck and I kicked fucking ass. 6 people asked questions at the end! And I knew the answer to every single one. Not like my presentation was incomplete, but like they wanted to know more about this incredibly boring shit that I am now an absolute expert on. Like, did you know Queen Elizabeth I was molested by her aunt and uncle? YEAH, CRAZY, I KNOW.

I was still feeling frisky six hours later, so I engaged a young man in a debate about ecofeminism. He was wearing sweatpants and an ironic U.S. flag t-shirt.


Dead Inside: Do Not Enter — Notes from the Zombie Apocalypse

Dead Inside: Do Not Enter
by Lost Zombies
2011, 160 pages, 8 x 10 x 0.5 inches
$15 Buy a copy on Amazon

Some of my favorite things about zombie movies are the details of the changed world. The dead grass, broken windows, toppled telephone poles, abandoned cars with missing wheels and trunks left open, boarded-up buildings, spent ammo shells, and other signs of struggle and desperation serve to create a fascinatingly creepy environment.

And that’s why I like Dead Inside: Do Not Enter so much. The book consists entirely of letters, hand-written warnings, and pages torn from journal entries that were written during the zombie pandemic. The notes are on matchbooks, napkins, photographs, advertisements, shopping lists, road maps, scraps of cardboard, and gum wrappers. Some of the notes are written with pen and pencil, others are written with lipstick, burnt wood, crayons, and blood.

The messages of the notes themselves tell the tale of the rise of the zombie pandemic, from tentative, joking questions about a “really bad flu,” escalating to confused panic, and later to grim acceptance of the new reality that the survivors now must live in.

In the introduction to Dead Inside, we learn that these notes had been found in a Dora the Explorer backpack. The first note presented in the book was written by the man who killed the owner of the backpack, a girl who was about 10 years old and had been bitten by a zombie (but had not yet turned into one). The man wrote “I opened her backpack and found all these notes and letters. This stuff is poisonous. No one in their right mind should read it. Reading this is like looking into the sun.” – Mark Frauenfelder

September 16, 2014


Here are some streaming links for various Christmas movies. Watch them while you drink hot chocolate, wrap presents, or procrastinate on studying for your finals/writing your paper. Whatever works best for you.

A Charlie Brown ChristmasA Christmas CarolA Christmas StoryBad SantaBeauty and the Beast: The Enchanted ChristmasElfErnest Saves ChristmasFrosty the SnowmanFrosty ReturnsHoliday InnHome AloneHome Alone 2How The Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)I’ll Be Home For ChristmasIt’s A Wonderful LifeJack FrostJingle All The WayThe Little Drummer BoyLove, ActuallyMickey’s Christmas CarolMickey’s Once Upon A ChristmasMiracle on 34th Street (1947)Miracle on 34th Street (1994)The Muppet Christmas CarolNational Lampoon’s Christmas VacationThe Nightmare Before ChristmasThe Polar ExpressRise of the GuardiansRudolph The Red-Nosed ReindeerA Very Harold & Kumar ChristmasSanta Claus Is Comin’ To TownThe Santa ClauseScroogedWhite ChristmasThe Year Without a Santa Claus


I cannot even put into words how many emotions this story makes me feel. It’s so sad and sweet and cute and just plain heartbreaking. It shows us how much of a monster Gothel really was, but it also shows just how strong Eugene and Rapunzel’s bond is. This is how you OTP.

Im so glad no one was home when I read this because I was just sobbing and giggling like an idiot.