Xiumin: No way~ Who the hell called it XIUHAREM?! Oh my god~ Seriously, what is that? *embarrassed but flattered*
Luhan: Oh nonono~ you stay away from my boyfriend! I know he’s hot as hell, but he’s taken, so~ Just stay away. *jealous boyfriend mode on*
D.O: How did he turn from “the squishy” into “the hot one”? It happened so fast… *teach me master*
Lay: *impressed* Wahhhhhhh~ Minseok hyung is really trending these days, isn’t he~ It took some people quite a long time to realize how hot he really is, though~
Chen: Okay, but for real~ What do I do to get my own harem? Should I take my clothes off too? *Is he serious? Is he joking? No one knows…*
Kris:*creeped out* Wooooow~ Xiuharem… Their thirst- I mean, THEIR ADMIRATION is very impressive…
Sehun: Seriously, y’all so thirsty for my Umin hyung, y’all need to sort out your priorities. And yeah~ stop dreaming. He’s too hot for you anyways, so~ *maknae keeping it real*
Tao: Okay, I agree that our hyung is hot… But really, I’m pretty handsome too~ Just look at me. I’m fabulous~ *desperatly tries to get a harem for himself*
Chanyeol: Aaaaaahhhh~ So now even Minseok hyung can get this sexy image~ This is so unfair… I’m the one with the deep voice, this harem should be mine… *300% done*
Baekhyun: Well… I get why they’re all so obsessed~ I mean… Have you seen his abs? Cause I have and believe me, ‘Xiuharem’ sounds accurate. *secretly follows all of the Xiuharem blogs he found on the internet last night*
Suho: *speechless* I’m not gonna lie, Xiuharem is a little scary~ I had literally no idea people could be so thirsty… You all need Jesus.
Kai: Not that I care, but~ I thought I was supposed to be the sexy member of this group… *confused, innocent baby*
Can we all imagine for a moment, the epic level of awesome which would have occurred if we had ever had an episode where Cooper comes to visit Blaine and they all go out to diner and then the bar with Elliott. Why is this not a thing that happened????
Picture it: Matt Bomer, Darren Criss, Chris Colfer, and Adam Lambert. Together. In one scene. Sassing, casting shade, one-upping each other, and then going out and getting loose and crazy on the dance floor… The Anderson boys being goofballs together to 80′s pop songs while Kurt and Elliott giggle and watch them fondly, Kurt and Cooper dancing as Kurt makes faces at Blaine because he now realizes that Cooper may be pretty but OH MY GOD will he stop stepping on his toes and WHO SAID it was okay to do the Macarena to Sia’s Chandelier????? Kurt and Elliott dancing together as half the bar watches discreetly (because HELL that’s hot) and Cooper tries to talk to his brother about his new almost-maybe role but Blaine has stopped listening and is staring at the two men on the dance floor with a gaze that gets more intent as he loosens his bowtie before getting up (cutting Cooper off mid-sentence) and sliding in behind the entwined pair to hook his fingers possessively into the loops of Kurt’s pants and whisper promises into the shell of his ear, and then Elliott and Cooper indiscriminately chatting up men and women alike as Kurt and Blaine dash for their cab because home is where the bed is and this is not time for a quickie in an alleyway, no, tonight is the night to finally christen their new king-sized bed which they bought when their structurally unsound bed (seriously, it must have been a flaw in the solid oak frame) cracked after their last night out with Elliott…. Besides, maybe the king-size is better if Elliott ever stays over again…
can i just say that i love it when you include bucky's attraction to women in your fics? like it's insanely hot when he compares sex with girls to sex with steve but also when he talks about sex with women in general, you make it so descriptive and dirty.. speaking of, what happened to steve and bucky's plans of "sharing a girl" as discussed in your magnum opus late show??? i would LOVE to see those realized
magnum opus oh god
i am violently about steve and bucky both being the Most Bisexuals To Ever Bisexual so i’m glad you like it because let me tell you it is so real
guess what’s in the works though pal – not exactly sharing a girl, it’s more sharing steve with a girl, a VERY WONDERFUL GIRL:
Peggy is petting at his hair. She drags her nails over his scalp, hard, and Steve’s entire body gives one big involuntary shudder, a stilted, hot moan falling out of throat.
“We just wanna make you feel good,” Bucky rumbles. He spreads Steve open with his free hand, a little rough. He can’t help it. That ass has always made him want to punish. “You feel good? Tell us what you want, sweetheart. You’re bein’ so sweet; what do you want?”
Oh my God I bet Bull was hot for Dagna for a little bit. She’s a redhead and a smith, after all. But then she started talking about magic in her excitable way and he realized weird magic crap no thank you.
Also she’s probably too intent on her craft to notice that he was flirting with her so he just lets it go and shuffles out of Undercroft.
Since the incident with his mother, Barry is terrified of thunderstorms. Joe helped when he was little. Thunder would come and Barry would immediately run into Joe's room and crawl under the covers. Joe would ask: "Sleep or story?" If Barry said sleep, then Joe would hold him close until he fell asleep. If he said story, then the two would drink hot chocolate on Joe's bed while the read from books or Joe told stories from his memory. Shadow puppets happened. Now he just cuddles Eddie.
immmmMMMM YELLINGGGG????? HAHHhaahaha bye this is like so adorable and upsetting at the same time which obviously means I LOVE IT like oh my god im gonna cry
also like eddie not realizing barry is afraid of thunderstorms so the first time it happens they’re not even really together yet and eddie just walked barry up to his apartment after their dinner date and is about to leave bc the weather looks really rough out there and he should head home before he gets stuck in it when then there’s this huge clap of thunder that’s basically eddie’s cue to leave but he notices how barry kind of jumps and looks really startled and instinctively reaches out but doesn’t quite make contact with eddie’s arm bc he’s still sort of awkward with physical contact
“hey,” barry says, and it’s hesitant but eddie isn’t going anywhere, he can tell something’s wrong, so he lets barry finish, “can you stay?” and eddie doesn’t even need to ask why, he’s a detective after all, he can put the pieces together, especially when the next clap of thunder comes and barry visibly twitches and eddie just puts his arm on barry’s shoulder and says, “yeah”
and barry ofc feels really embarrassed about the whole thing and sort of attempts to explain “ever since my mom…” but eddie tells him it’s ok if he doesn’t want to talk about it and barry just nods and lets a comfortable silence fall over them before he kind of laughs, “joe used to make me hot chocolate” and eddie just grins at him, “well, you’re in luck, because i make one mean hot chocolate”
and then they cuddle in barry’s tiny twin bed with hot chocolate (with extra mashmallows) under like five blankets and watch dumb netflix movies and laugh with each other until barry falls asleep tucked under eddie’s arms (eddie hears him mumble “thanks” right before he drifts off) and eddie stays up to watch him sleep, just to make sure that he’s sleeping soundly, before he presses a kiss to barry’s forehead and falls asleep himself
Leonardo gets lost easily–physically and in thought. It’s even worse when he’s drawing, a gift he fears he is losing. He squints at his pencil marks, reaching out for his mug for a drink only to realize it’s empty. He sighs, standing from his seat and walking to the coffee machine. Mind abuzz with line and shape and color, he turns as soon as the mug is full, only to bump into someone behind him, spilling the unfortunately hot drink on his hand.
1. Everyone seems to think the douchebag hat is the fedora, but it’s actually called the TRILBY. Say no to the Trilby.
2. HENLEY SHIRTS PLS. It’s a great basic top and in general they look good on everyone. FOR EXAMPLE: ED O’BRIEN FROM RADIOHEAD IS THE HENLEY GOD.
OH SHIT LOOK IT HERE. ED O’BRIEN ALSO FOLLOWING TIP #1 BY NOT WEARING A TRILBY.
3. FLANNEL. Please wear flannel so girls like me can steal your shirts.
4. PLEASE BUY NEW UNDERWEAR REGULARLY. ADDENDUM: PLEASE WASH UNDERWEAR REGULARLY. There was a study in 2011 that stated 1 in every 8 will wear their underwear twice or even three times before washing it.
5. Don’t wear these pants. Why? I had a hot dream about my Grade 11 physics teacher a few years back and the dream abruptly ended when i realized he was wearing pleated corduroy pants. He also happened to look like Ed O’Brien. Maybe I want all of you to dress like Ed O’Brien.
The umbrella, when it rains - Jessie. Her hair can’t get wet are you crazy??
The popcorn at the cinema - James. He’s carrying everything else, too.
The baby, when it cries - They pass it around like hot potato.
The ice cream cone, when they share - James, cause if Jessie’s holding it, there will be no sharing.
The remote, when they sit down to watch a movie - Jessie
The basket, when they go shopping - James
The door, on dates - James. He was raised to be a proper gentleman, after all.
The other’s hand, most often - Oh god. They do it all the time without even thinking about it. It’s pretty 50/50. They’re constantly showing physical affection without realizing they’re doing it
Their breath, upon seeing the other on their wedding day - James. Because let’s be real, this man never wanted to get married ever, and Jessie would be all “Hell yeah I’m the hottest bitch here” when walking down the aisle
The camera, when they take pictures together - Meowth :D
kyungsoo and you are dating. but you're taller than him. and your ex (you can choose who) tries to take you back. please and thank you !!
His eyes were always the first thing everyone noticed. They were colossal and always were darting around, shooting curious glances everywhere. Sweat slowly collected at the top of his forehead as he waited nervously under the hot summer sun. “Kyungsoo?” you call out, bringing him out of his mind’s endless worrying. He turns around and smiles at the young female in front of him. Oh so she’s a bit tall, Kyungsoo thinks when he realizes that he has to tilt his head up a bit to meet your gaze. “Yeah. That’s me.” Kyungsoo awkwardly smiles. You laugh and and introduce yourself.
“I haven’t really done this before.” you confess as you take a seat for two. “Yeah. I haven’t really done this as well. My friend Baekhyun told me to give online dating a shot.” Kyungsoo admits as well. “Wait, Baekhyun as in Byun Baekhyun?” you ask, slowly raising an eyebrow. “Yeah. How-” “Oh god! We’re in the same Psychology class. I hate his guts!” you exclaim. Kyungsoo closes his eyes and laughs until his stomach hurts. “It takes a while to get used to his sense of humor.” he explains between intakes for air. And like that, somehow, your first date floats on, reminiscing on the shit Baekhyun pulled.
“Coming!” Kyungsoo calls out as he runs for the door. He doesn’t bother to try to fix his hair before opening the door; it’s a lost cause anyway. He smiles when he sees you and makes way for you enter. “What happened to the keys I gave you last week?” Kyungsoo asks as he closes the door. “I forgot them at home, sorry.” smiling sheepishly as you plop onto the couch of his living room. The apartment was brightly lit and although you preferred it to be a bit dimmer, you swallow your complaint. Kyungsoo heads to the kitchen to get dinner ready. As soon as he leaves your face drops as you feel your phone vibrate.
1 NEW TEXT MESSAGE
You internally groan and read it.
From: Lay To: ____ Message: You’re at his house? Come on, we both know you don’t want this.
To: Lay From: ____ Message: Stop texting me.
To: ____ From: Lay Message: Come on. You’re with some pussy that cooks and cleans, you need a real guy, not a sissy.
To: Lay From: ____ Message: You don’t know what I need.
To: ____ From: Lay Message: So you admit he’s a sissy. Does he cry after having sex?
To: Lay From: ____ Message: Stop
To: ____ From: Lay Message: Did I hurt your feelings? I’ve seen the two of you, he’s like fucking half of your height, that’s disgusting. I didn’t know you had a thing for midgets lol I know how conscious you are about appearances, so at least come back to me since we look good together. You look like a freak with him so just stop.
“Dinner’s ready!” Kyungsoo calls out from the kitchen. “I’m not hungry.” you answer, still staring at your phone screen. You gasp when it’s suddenly snatched from your hands. “What’s gotten you so upset that you’d skip-” Kyungsoo trails off. “Kyungsoo-” Kyungsoo’s smile fades as his eyes furiously scan through the text messages. “Who’s Lay?” he asks, his voice stern and serious. “No one.” you whisper. “Who the hell is Lay?” Kyungsoo yells. You wince at the sharpness of his voice. Kyungsoo’s eyes are wide in anger and shock but filled with disappointment. “He’s my ex, but I’m not with him. Kyungsoo listen-” You try to explain but he cuts you off. “Are you embarrassed?” “What?” “Of being with me. Are you embarrassed?” he asks sullenly. Kyungsoo stares into your eyes, searching for an honest answer. “No I’m not. Never.” you reply as you take his fae in your hands. “If you’re really that uncomfortable, I’ve been thinking of buying insoles and if it helps I guess I can also buy some shoes that have a bit of a heel-” Kyungsoo’s silenced by you gently pressing your lips on his. The two of you remain like that for minutes. It’s quiet and honestly a bit awkward. You pull away and lean your foreheard on his. “Kyungsoo, it doesn’t matter, not to me, not anymore. I could touch the freaking sky and you could be stuck to the ground, it doesn’t matter to me. Let people say what they want. I won’t care anymore.” Kyungsoo smiles. “I’m still a bit mad you hid this from me.” You laugh and smile at your adorable boyfriend. “Besides, what does this Lay guy look like?” Kyungsoo asks nervously. “Not even half as good as you.” You reply before pulling him in for another kiss.
note: done in like, 10 minutes, idk. Based on this post. For Jercy, even though all you’re doing is making gifs and eating donuts.
“Oh my god,” is all Blaine can say through the utter mortification as soon as he realizes what he just said, the waiter–Kurt, according to his name tag–freezing by his table.
“Did you just say ‘Love you, too’?” Kurt asks, eyebrows furrowing, and of course, of course he had to humiliate himself in front of the hot waiter. Now he’s never gonna get his number. And also maybe never eat at the Spotlight Diner again.
Blaine’s stuttering through an apology when Kurt winks, he winks, and says, “Maybe in a few months.”
Joe’s head was throbbing and he wasn’t really sure why he was in the hospital when he forced his eyes open. Then he realized that his skin felt hot and itchy all over, so that explained some things. And Nancy was there, so Frank wasn’t too far away, that was comforting.
“What happened?” he muttered, raising a hand to rub at his eyes to try and clear his blurry vision. The last thing he remembered was feeling incredibly dizzy, as if that burger he had for lunch decided not to agree with his stomach.
This guy from my accounting class kept begging to see my “hot arab boyfriend” and then he realized the picture he saw on my phone was actually an all time low promo shoot (so that guy is actually jack) and i’m dating an asian guy i met during robotics
In reference to your dance au for bagginshield, please consider: Bilbo doing some choreography to Partition - Beyonce and Thorin promptly dying inside because he has an "oh no, he's hOT" moment
I FORGOT TO REPLY TO THIS DAMMIT IYA
but yes please. bilbo isn’t even trying to be sexy or anything AND IS TOTALLY UNAWARE OF THE RAGING BONER HE’S GIVING THORIN. like Mahal fucking wept okay, Thorin is not okay, DEFINITELY not okay when Bilbo is there dancing away without realizing how much Thorin would just like to raVISH HIM RIGHT THERE. How does one dance that sexy and not even be aware of it???
I’M SAVING THIS FOR LATER TO DO A DOODLE SO ANON JUST WAIT FOR MEEEE.
Your muse just caught mine singing when they thought they were alone. Send “Nice voice” for my muse’s reaction to them realizing yours was listening
Ah, ¡no sabía que en Japón
pasaban esa clase de canciones!
En realidad, se daba cuenta que en aquél país
les gustaba mucho Inglaterra y el idioma inglés, pero no se imaginó que
pasarían una de las canciones de Christina Aguilera.
Por eso mismo, subió un
poco el volumen y continuó la canción con mucho ánimo:
❝Well, by now I’m getting all bothered and hot
hits my mouth he really hits the spot
lips like sugar cane, oh
things come for those who wait❞
Y luego tarareó el resto de la canción, mientras bailaba
entusiasmada, hasta que vio al mayor observarla y se sobresaltó:
❝¡Lo siento! ¿Está muy fuerte el volumen?❞
preguntó y se apresuró a
bajarlo, más se dio cuenta de otra cosa: ❝¿O estaba gritando?❞
Got ya. I was more thinking, hideo comforts Tyler in rare moment of weakness. And like, helps him heal, only for Tyler to realize he's falling for Hideo. I'm not much of an angst person either!
I see you. I see your goals and i respect them. Imagine also, tho, Adrian developing a respect-crush on Hideo and his fighting style and spirit, while Tyler simply cannot stop THINKING about the little troll, and the two of them are up in bed, just talking about Hideo with such vigor, only to simultaneously realize: oh no, he’s hot