nowess said:

Normal family man Velkoz is searching for a friend (to study) and runs into another businessman who definitely is not Blitzcrank.

 Vel’Koz was given a break. It was his first since starting his job, and Vel’Koz could not understand for the life of him why humans would ever want to deviate from the task they were given. In the meantime, Vel’Koz decided that he would put his persona’s break to good use by starting phase one point five: Make a friend. But Vel’Koz did not have friends. He had subjects.

The Eye of the Void decided to start by visiting the nearby coffee shop, The Final Hour, renowned for its incredibly bitter black coffee. Vel’Koz slammed into the door with his body, pushing it open through force and sliding off the side into the store. The coffee shop was very sparse, Vel’Koz noticed. The lights dimmed, there wasn’t too much decoration, some soft music in the background, and there weren’t very many humans. Was this truly where humans often meet?

Regardless, he only had another half hour, so Vel’Koz knew he had to commit to this experiment. He swerved around chairs and tables by bending his body around them, before sliding up to the front counter, where a very bored looking human was standing.

“Good day, sir, welcome to The Final Hour, where we purge all our coffee in the finest silver. What would you like?” the human said in a disinterested tone. Going by his build, he seemed to be a human male in his teens. Vel’Koz catalogued this information before answering.

“Yes, good evening, human, I would like…” he said, before examining the menu above. He squinted momentarily to focus in on the words, before his eyes settled on the server once more. “The Moonsilver Latte, in your smallest container.”

“That’ll be five dollars, sir,” the human responded. Upon focusing on his attire, Vel’Koz saw that the human’s name was in fact Sean.

First, however, he had to retrieve currency. After a few moments of fumbling around uselessly with one tentacle, he managed to gather up three dollars from his suit pocket and dump it on the counter. Afterwards, he swept the receipt that was given in return into his pocket, saving it for another time where he could gather knowledge from its meaning. While Sean made his coffee, Vel’Koz decided it would be time to scope out a friend to acquire. He scanned the tables, before honing in on one striking individual.

Vel’Koz approached the table, allowing himself to fall upon the seat across from the individual with large, yellow hands. He wore glasses, and as far as Vel’Koz’s research indicated, having glasses was a sign of intellectual superiority. “Greetings, fellow human,” he said. “The weather is very temperate today.”

“Yes,” the obvious human responded. “It is eighty-two degrees and sunny in the city of Demacia.”

“I am Velvel, Demacian human originally hailing from Zaun,” Vel’Koz responded, holding out a tentacle as is the human custom.

“I am called Blitzel, eccentric Piltover businessman on a business trip,” he responded, his hand reaching out to grasp the tentacle offered. Vel’Koz found it to be oddly cold for its temperature, yet it was possible that the humans of Piltover were colder than those of Demacia.

“It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Blitzel,” Vel’Koz said. Inwardly, his mind race. Phase one point five was almost complete.

“Yes,” Blitzel responded. “It is nice to meet you, friend.”

“Friend,” Vel’Koz repeated, though his mind was going a mile a minute. Already such progress! Yes, he could use this human.

Soon, very soon, they would become best friends.

Watch on

Soko - Love letter

nowess said:

To the anon asking about how Velkoz in a suit works: Just think of octodad.

Yes pretty much this! If you don’t know Octodad, I’m fairly sure a good google image search will clear it up pretty quickly.


Cult photographer and filmmaker Todd Selby’s latest short is a revealing portrait of performance artist Christine Sun Kim.

Deaf from birth, Kim turned to using sound as a medium during an artist residency in Berlin in 2008, and has since developed a practice of lo-fi experimentation that aims to re-appropriate sound by translating it into movement and vision. “It’s a lot more interesting to explore a medium that I don’t have direct access to and yet has the most direct connection to society at large,” says the artist. “Social norms surrounding sound are so deeply ingrained that, in a sense, our identities cannot be complete without it.

Watch on

"You get trated nicer if you’re well dressed. I don’t want to go around like a dreary old lady."

I can only hope that I’m this sartorially inclined when I’m over 50. Leopard sunglasses are a definite DO.

{By Nowess found via The Glamourai

nowess said:


Aaawww dude I’m so sorry! I’ve been in Maine for a while and I didn’t get any of your messages!!! How are you?? Also, WHAT CHOICE DID YOU HAVE THAT DAY?