7

public apologies (2014)

1) i am sorry my kindness became cruelty

2) i am sorry you lived your life like an apology

3) i am sorry i always ate take away instead of your tender home cooked meals

4) i am sorry i didn’t know the difference between selfishness & self preservation 

5) i am sorry i called out your brother’s name when we were having sex

6) i am sorry i promised you gentle realism

7) i am sorry i never learnt to pronounce your name properly

8) i am sorry i shoplifted every gift i have ever given to a friend

9) i am sorry i saw your suffering as something beautiful

10) i am sorry that i don’t wake up when you begin sobbing at 3am

11) i am sorry for comparing ever kiss to the taste of pork

12) i am sorry for only coming up with 3 reasons to keep respiring

13) i am sorry for equating ever relationship with a lobotomy

14) i am sorry i never picked up my mobile even though my dad called me 43 times on his birthday 

15) i am sorry for liking faces with a black eye & hands with raw knuckles

16) i am sorry

~~~(Concept: wearable performance art)::::

Hand embroidered white jumper with black string depicting the concept of a performative and externalised state of being apologetic. Instead of repressing or harbouring feelings of guilt, desire, perversion, etc, the wearer can publicly display their affective state and past events which may hold conflict or trigger tension. Furthermore, historical artefacts which are both intimate and personal are made even more vulnerable by this act of wearing it as an everyday and integrated piece of clothing, challenging the notion of a sacred and internalised state of suffering and remorse. The anecdotal and narrative nature of the sentences also serves to conjure a more personalised and relatable form by evoking a standard post-pubescent mood. Ultimately the wearer can confront and be confronted by their own clothing. 

Made by Zsuzsanna Ihar (Zsusz) - August 2014

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