‘Nother plot idea.

I love the undercover lovers trope for hartwin so hard. I love their pining as they play the roles of spouses or boyfriends or what have you, this is rock solid gold.

But, I want the pair of them to go on their undercover, play their parts perfectly in public, and think about it personally very little in private. They do their jobs and go back to their room at night and are so busy with surveillance, corresponding with merlin, setting up their traps or what have you and passing out like logs with no time to think of themselves and their pining.  

They wake up in the mornings, go about their routines getting ready, weave around each other in the bathroom and synch up so smoothly, one brushing teeth while the other shaves, one reaching for something and the other handing it wordlessly, one doing his hair, and the other smoothing down the back of it where he can’t see it. doesn’t matter who does which.

The mission finishes with a resounding and efficient success and they go home.


Then they get home, get off the plane, and eggsy get’s harry’s luggage for him, follows him to the cab, follows him straight home and harry thinks nothing of it,

They go inside, Eggsy starts to unpack their bags and he stops dead.

There’s no space for him here. this is harry’s house, and he doesn’t share his closet, his bathroom, his bed, theres no spot for eggsy’s shoes or drawer space for  his night clothes.

Harry is downstairs making tea and doesn’t find the oddness. Until thunking of luggage down the steps and a flustered and fumbling eggsy stumbles to the foyer with his suitcase.

The ruse only just broke and Harry is speechless as eggsy apologizes and laughs and leaves. 

It was so natural for the both of them, its like a slap in the face to watch his door shut behind…who? what is eggsy exactly now?

Cue delayed weird awkward pining.

At HQ Eggsy doesn’t even know how he starts to hover, there are lapses in his sanity where he finds himself making Harry his tea and then handing it to him like the most natural thing in the world and then he freezes as Harry stares at his hand holding the saucer and its and Ohshit moment of what the fuck am i doing? 

Harry can’t help the same reactions, he finds eggsy doing his report work and wordlessly goes to file and turn in his finished papers. He finds himself too many times in the seat by the fireplace of eggsy’s office before he knows whats going on, with a glass of scotch in hand waiting for him to finish his typing. 

the two of them got so used to each other and their intimacy undercover they can’t (don’t want to) break the habits.

Mister Yoga // Calum Hood

“Baby?” I heard Calum call from somewhere in the apartment. “Where are you?”

“In the living room,” I replied, setting down the yoga mat I had bought that day. I wanted to get in shape without having to go to the gym, so one of my close friends suggested yoga.

Calum showed up in the doorway and looked down at the mat in confusion. “What are you doing?” He asked, and then laughed. “That rug doesn’t look like a rug.”

“It’s not a rug, idiot,” I teased him. “I’m going to do yoga. Wanna join?”

Before I knew it, Calum had all of his clothes off except for his boxers. “Ready!” He said, standing in a superhero position beside me. I laughed and moved the mat over, telling him he didn’t get a mat because I’d only bought one.

I started to try some of the positions that I was reading off of my phone, and Calum tried along with me. We did some well, and then once they started to get harder, he stopped trying as much.

“How do people do this?” He asked, looking at me in despair as I got into the position.

“Like this,” I smiled, showing off a bit.

“Oh yeah?” He smirked, and then reached over and squeezed my waist, tickling me and sending me into a fit of laughter, falling out of the position and onto the floor. Calum smiled and climbed on top of me, looking down at me with a grin on his face. “You don’t look like you’re doing it now.”

“Because you tickled me,” I laughed, reaching up and ruffling his hair. He crinkled his nose and shook his head like he was a puppy, and then leaned down to kiss me.

We ended up doing more kissing than yoga, and I eventually pushed Calum off of me, shaking my head with a laugh. “I guess making out is somewhat of a workout,” I said, sitting up on the mat.

“You know what else is a workout?” Calum asked with a wink.

I looked at him with a smirk, “Yoga!”

Cooking with kids

After a couple reblogs, let’s have a real post. I love cooking. I don’t get to cook how I’d like nearly enough. The gf hates flavor. I have a full-time job. I have 4 kids. Amazon doesn’t ship food to my house. So, whatever. Instant mashed potatoes are fine.

However, that’s not how I want my kids to cook. Baby Man loves cooking with me. Loves it. In fact, he made the (instant) potatoes for dinner tonight. With help, of course. I want him to cook with me. I want him to love cooking. I’m trying to raise a well-rounded husband here. What girl/guy doesn’t want a husband who will cook for them? So, how do raise kids who loves good food with a wide range of flavors if you barely have time to make mac & cheese from a box?

See, this is another reason I need this job. More time to cook for my kids.

Everything about Damon in the latest episode was perfect, and how we saw all aspect of the Damon that has been built over the past six seasons. 

Literally, everything; his casual relationship with Tyler and Matt, and how it was all you know, instead hey quick leave, it was more, here take my car get Matt to a hospital asap. 

How it was obvious everything he got his mum to tell Stefan was all he wanted to hear, and how heartbroken he looked when he found out that she didn’t feel anything towards him or Stefan.

 How well he knows the people he loves, like, he knew exactly what to get Lily to say or do to get Stefan to turn his humanity on, and he knew exactly how Elena was feeling in regards to Jo’s baby.

But more than anything, how he is still Damon. How unlike a lot of the other characters, his development didn’t mean changing his character completely. He’s still insecure, and thus is struggling to tell Elena about the cure, he’s still impulsive thus giving Lily the ascendant without giving it a second thought, and how just because him and Bonnie are friends doesnt mean he wont mess up.

Oh and not to mention his hair looked fab, and considering what a train wreck it was last episode / has been since season four, I’m a very happy Damon stan.

suho deserves this look how happy he was to announce the Tokyo dome tour he just looks like all his hard work is really payin off and im so proud of my little baby i hope he gets everything he wants and shows anyone who doesn’t believe in him what he can do

velvet dresses, ruby earrings, quick kisses. i’m blowing bubbles & looking up at him with my big green eyes & he can hardly stand it.
he’s got a hot temper & a fast car & strong hands. he knows what he wants & he knows exactly how to get it.
empty parking lots, sparkly nail polish, pink lips.
milk & honey, candy baby, close your eyes & say goodnight.
—  loaded gun 

You know what my favorite thing is about Ronan and Adam?

There is some massive crushing going on, but there isn’t any obsessive lusting stuff. It’s not like Ronan is looking at Adam and we get his interior monologue like Holy shit, I want to kiss Parrish, or anything about his body being really hot. No! He is constantly describing Adam’s face, the odd, elegant lines of it. Then you have Adam thinking that the shadows lining Ronan’s face render him stark and handsome.

Those two are just so obsessed with each others faces.

Like, I do love hot steamy fanfictions where they go straight from first kiss to sex scene, but whenever I picture an intensely romantic scene between the two of them, I picture Ronan just kissing all the elegant lines and crevices of Adam’s face and lips, his cheeks, his eyes, his jaw. And Adam just tracing his fingers over the savagely handsome face that he loves.

Because what else would they do? They have spent so much time staring at each other’s faces, memorizing them, that when they finally admit their feelings to each other, I can see them both being adorably eager to just get to know their respective faces with the rest of their senses.

Picturing Ronan finally getting to touch Adam’s face like he wants to is the most romantic thing ever.

“Lamby Prance Prance Revolution: An Origin” or “For Want of EweTube”


Mrs. Pines: Honey! Get over here! I want to show you something!

Mr. Pines: (entering room) Coming-coming. What’s…up? Aw…Mabel, you look adorable in that little lamb costume…wait, that can’t be right. (looks at the baby in his arms)

Mabel: (pats him on the nose) Boop. (giggles)

Mr. Pines: Then who’s-? Oh. Oh my. (to the kid in the lamb costume) I’m so sorry, Dipper.

Dipper: (waves) Hi daddy!

Mrs. Pines: Don’t apologize to your son. He loves it.

Mr. Pines: Well, I think that either of us would find it really, really embarrassing if we had to wear something like that as kids.

Mrs. Pines: But you’re taking out your camera.

Mr. Pines: I can’t help it. He’s so cute right now. Still…(snaps a photo) pretty embarrassing for the little guy.

Mrs. Pines: Aw, now you’re just being pessimistic. I’m sure Dipper will look back on this - and all the photos you’re taking - with fondness. He’s so psyched about his new duds that he even wrote a song about them.

Mr. Pines: Really? Like with lyrics and stanzas?

Mrs. Pines: (waves palm at him) Eh, kinda. (points at her son) Hit it, kiddo!

Dipper: (gets out of chair) Well… who wants a lamby, lamby, lamby?
I do! I do!
So, go up and greet your mammy, mammy, mammy
Hi there! Hi there!
So march, march, march around the daisies,
Don’t, don’t, don’t you forget about the ba-by!

Mr. Pines: That…that made no sense. (wipes a tear from his eyes) And it was amazing.

Mrs. Pines: Told ya.

Mr. Pines: I just wish I had taped it.

Mrs. Pines: Handled. (whips out cassette) Now we can make copies and show this to your folks, my folks, your Uncle Stan, and anyone else we want. Maybe even the whole world!

Mr. Pines: Heh, I don’t think we could afford to make that many tapes. Still…it would be nice to share this with everyone. If only there was a mass media platform we could use to distribute this footage on a nationwide scale in a concise and pervasive manner with the potential for immense returns and at barely any cost to ourselves.

Mrs. Pines: (scratches chin) Yeah. That’d be pretty neat. Hmmm…

Mr. Pines: Hmmm….

Mabel: *BURP*

Mrs. Pines: (gasps) Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Mr. Pines: (smiles) I think I am!

Mr. and Mrs. Pines: The USA’s Most Hilarious Candid Catastrophes! (they hug their kids to them and laugh)

Dipper: (blinking obliviously) What’s going on, mommy?

Mrs. Pines: Hopefully big cash prize money, my little lamb. (hushed) Hopefully big cash prize money.

Exo reaction to their girlfriend dancing to "LUVORATORRRRRRY" with your best friend!

Sehun: *Sees you on stage* Omg why is she there?

*then realize you’re performing to “luvoratorrrrrry”* *smiles to himself* Is this your way of telling you love me?

D.O: *at first he was like* Hell yeah baby!

*then* what’s the lyrics, again? *Starts* laughing*

Chanyeol: *surprised to see you and your friend on stage* * waves at you*

*listens carefully* I see what you did there, you silly girl, i know you want to tell my you want me.

Suho: *cheers for you* fighting!!

*starts dancing along*  1+1= i love you

Lay: *gets shy and cheers for you*

*starts laughing * the lyrics are so cute!

Kai: *sexy mode on* don’t worry i’ll be right here watching you

I know you want me. *smirks* come here

Luhan: * controllable laughter* what is this? *fanboys over you*

hmm. is she trying to tell me something? *smirks*

Xiumin: My little baozi she dancing for me!!!

you know i am ready to get married to you now

baekhyun: omo

this is perrrrrrrfect!

Chen : *just looking at you standing on stage , he can’t control hid feelings and wants to kiss you*

I have been wait for this day for so long…

Tao: *sends a kiss to you*

I love you please marry me!!

Kris: *surprised* is she performing for me?

THis is so beautiful i want to cry

Many women tend to “forget” that a child is concieved by 2 people meaning there’s another person involved meaning you are not carrying the weight of a having a child by urself. Dont start with the “guys dont carry the baby so they dont know what we go through” reasoning bc I dont care. Obviously guys dont carry babies so why even bring it up, that’ll never change. If you choose to get an abortion w/o even telling the father, you are scum. He has just as much rights to determine the child’s wellbeing as you. Dont even come on my post screaming bout dead beats or pregnancies from rape bc this is not what this post is speaking bout. It’s bout dads that actually want to be a father figure to their unborn.

Can Gryffindors and Slytherins be friends? - Why of course they can!

No matter what houses we’re in, you and I will always be friends.

I kinda wanted to draw cool Gorilla for a change..  ..  sometimes I wish he never met Otae.. admit it it would be a lot healthier for him..

also I kinda get why Sougo doesn’t like that mayo freak.. I mean.. he just pops in and has all the attention.. anyone would be jelly.. :I   let’s all support Sougo. 

N over.

anonymous asked:

can u do a imagine where u go to the beach and you ex is there with his new gf and you want to make him jealous so you pull the tan attractive boy (calum) over and whisper "I'm so sorry please play along" and u make out and when u pull away your like "omg I'm really so it's just my ex" and he's like " I didn't mind baby doll"

you were at the beach, chilling with your friends and you decided to get some drinks bc it was so bloody hot. when you were in line to get your drinks, you noticed your ex smirking, walking towards you with his arms around his new girlfriend. you didnt want him to rub it in your face and start asking questions, so you did what you thought was the best in the situation: grab the guy in front of you and said “i’m so sorry please play along”. he looked so confused for a sec but after you placed your lips on his, he finally got it and started kissing you back. his lips were so soft and for a minute there, you had completely forgotten about your ex. if it wasn’t for the lady behind you clearing her throat and telling you to move forward, you would have been so lost in that kiss. both of you finally pulled away from each other, both your faces crimson red, laughing nervously. “i’m so sorry it was just my ex and yknow…” “oh no it’s fine. i didn’t mind at all babydoll, maybe we can continue this back at my place” he winked at you.

Or Nah-Shawn Mendes

Prompt: Or Nah by the weeknd

It was one of those days where I listen to the same song over and over again. Today it is Or Nah and it is getting me in the mood, I’m grinding and singing along and just enjoying myself. Shawn was out with the boys so I had the house to myself. I was shaking my ass like there was no tomorrow and I heard clapping behind me. Shit. I turn around and I see a smirking Shawn watching me. 

“Y/N don’t stop on my account.” His innocent face was laced with wanting and the bulge at his crotch told me exactly what he wanted. 

“Shawn. I can make it even better baby.” I walk closer to him and purr in his ear. I take his hand in mine, walk him to a chair and sit him down. 

I start the song to the beginning and I start to give him a lap dance, my ass shaking and his hands started to roam around on my body. I roll my hips and then I straddle him, my lips go straight to the soft spot on his neck. 

“Y/N. Bedroom baby, let’s see if you can ride my face.” His voice was husky and considering that Shawn rarely ever talks dirty, I get more than a little turned on. Wetness grows between my thighs and Shawn stands up with me still wrapped around him and we go to our bedroom. 

“I like the sound of that baby.” I continue to suck and his neck and he releases a deep groan and I know that I’m doing something right. Shawn lays me on our Ned and automatically takes off my panties, his fingers grazing my wet slit. 

“Y/N, you’re so wet baby.” Shawn starts to undress me and I unbutton his shirt. My fingers go straight to his toned abs and I feel Shawn’s tongue lapping at the outside of my pussy. 

“Mmm. Baby. I need more. Please.” I whimper and move, he always has this effect on me and he loves it.

“Come on, ride my face Y/N.” Shawn then pulls me on top of him while his hands go on either leg and he sucks at my clit. 

“Aahh. Shawn. Please. More. Fingers.” I pant out instructions at him and when he moves one hand to my bundle of nerves, I steady myself on the wall, his long fingers pump inside of me while his lips sucked and suckled, lapping up all of my juices. I could feel my climax building up at the out of my stomach.

“S-Shawn. I’m close.” I gasp at his teeth lightly grazes my clit. A strong of moans erupt from my lips as he continues his work on my body. 

I climax soon after that and Shawn flips me over so he is on top and he kisses me, firm and dominantly. He sheds his pants quickly and frees his errection along with it. I grasp it and I guide it inside of me. Shawn gives me a little time to adjust before pumping in and out of me. Quickly. 

“Y/N. You’re so tight baby.” He lets out a string of moans and groans into my neck while I leave scratches on his back. We reach pair climaxes together and lay down side by side, trying to get out breath back. 

“We should do that again.” I say panting and he nods in agreement.

I finished reading the first Chapters of QoS. These are my thoughts:

- Arobynn is still a flawless character and I am 100% positive that he wants Dorian.

- Speaking of Dorian, poor baby :(

- I am very excited to learn what CHAOL BAE LIGHT OF MY LIFE is plotting. Also, I am almost sure that his female guard is Nesryn Faliq. Let’s just hope Sarah doesn’t get any ideas to put her as a new love interest for him, because we all know that Chaol x Aelin needs to be endgame, ok? tks.

- It’s going to be amazing to see Aelin trying to rescue Aedion with Arobynn’s and possibly Chaol’s help.

- It was a lot better than I expected after the boredom that was Heir of Fire. I am actually excited.

- These three Chapters would have been perfect if it weren’t for the constant forced mentions of Rowan. I get Aelin misses her best friend, but it was absolutely not necessary to mention this over three times. We get you love him, Sarah.

anonymous asked:

Hi Sarah, I don't mean to bother you but just wanted to ask something. My boyfriend is trying to guilt me into having sex without a condom, but I am very adamant about no unprotected sex until marriage. Any ideas on what I could do? Again, sorry if I'm a bother. xoxo

Short answer: Tell him no and call him an idiot. 

Long answer: IF you have the right anatomy for baby making (unsure of your gender, sorry) then buy a bunch of baby books for new parents and start carrying them around with you everywhere. When he inevitably gets curious and asks about them say to him, “What? You want to have sex without a condom so that must mean you’re cool with me getting pregnant” then proceed to quiz him on his preferred baby names.

If you don’t have this anatomy (or even if you do) then ask him which doctor’s office he prefers to go to because you want to be prepared just incase you two contract any STD’s, and for a bonus find some pamphlets or send him a link to information about STDs, ya know, just because he’s clearly so prepared for the possibility of it to happen if he doesn’t want to use a condom, so he might as well read up on it.

If he still insists, then congratulations my friend, this means he wants to marry marry you, because why else with this upstanding man want to not use a condom if not to conceed to your aforementioned rule of no unprotected sex until marriage.

Okay but seriously, most of all tell him that you’re actually smart and you don’t want to have unprotected sex and if he gets mad at you, then retrieve is discarded condom, flick him in the eye with it and saunter out of there like the fabulous, unpregnant, not STD contracted human that you are.

Good luck, my friend. 

All right so here’s my new theory thing about this whole Uchiha mess.

So Sasuke came back, married Sakura in secret because he wants to protect her and make sure no harm comes to her, they have a baby, he’s there for the first couple years tops, gets word that people are out for Uchiha blood again, leaves so he can protect what little family he has left. (He doesn’t want the bad guys to know that he has family.) Tries to track down the bad guys, does this until Sarada turns 12 and earns her Genin title. At this point she’ll go out of the village on missions (I’m pretty sure she’s probably never been outside the village) and what not so Sasuke comes back, becomes her sensei in order to protect her when she’s out of the village.
I also believe Boruto is going to find Sasuke cool as fuck.

That’s all I got.

RP Starter Cartoonmaniac

Tadashi sat on a bench, alone, nearby where his little nerdy brother was goofing off with his girlfriend Cora. The older Hamada couldn’t help but let a smile grace his features at how happy the two of them looked. Tadashi was also thankful that the park seemed to be isolated today. Usually Hiro wouldn’t mess around on the playground if there were other people around because he thought playgrounds were for babies and he didn’t want to get made fun of. In reality though the smaller raven enjoyed goofing around on the playground equipment and to be honest, Tadashi sometimes joined him. The older one chuckled as Hiro shouted something at the sky, he had no idea what the two of them were playing, but it was hilarious watching it from a distance.

“I am the king of the world! Bow down to me mortals and my queen, Cora! Nobody will take this land from us,” Hiro shouted to the sky, going for a deeper, more intimidating voice when in reality he looked as harmless as a kitten.


“Then what do we do? Cancel the wedding? But your sister is here…”
“She would come here anyway, we can’t be apart for too long, wherever I go, she goes.”
“We arranged the tourney…”
“So what? We can have the tourney in a name of our new king, it will be a great way to spit in Ferdinand’s face once more. He’ll be here within a few weeks, so he might be just in time for the show.”
“Do you really don’t want to be my wife?”
“I’m a terrible wife, Cherie… I’d rather be your evil mistress. Once we deal with Ferdinand, Hermann will get the crown, you will be a crown prince… Look at me, baby, I’m no princess. I can lead an army, I can kill, I can torture, but I can’t wear white dress. It doesn’t suit me.”
“I don’t care for the damn dress… I just want to be with you…”
“Then why waste time on formalities?”
“But…what about James?”
“What about him? He stays here, he’s a captain of King’s Guard, I need him, Hermann needs him…”
“He hates me.”
“He doesn’t hate you, baby. He simply doesn’t like you, because you don’t like him.”
“So…he stays?”
“He stays and we won’t talk of it again. I know, he hurt you, but you started it, so I think you’re both equal here. He’s not your enemy.”
“I bet he doesn’t think so.”
“I’m better at knowing what people think, remember? C'mon, it’s going to be alright… try to get some rest.”
“And what about you?”
“I’ve got a few things to take care of… I’ll tell Alice, that you’re awake. She wouldn’t stop talking about you all day, I bet she can’t wait to tell you all my secrets. C’mon, I’ll be back before you know it.”

Imagine talking to your boyfriend Bucky over the phone while he’s on a mission with Steve.

“God I love you.” Bucky laughed making you giggle on the other end of the line.

“I love you too. Do you know when you’ll be home?” You asked.

“Soon doll. I promise. We’re almost done.” He said before you could hear Steve in the background.

“Buck, come on. The sooner we finish the sooner you can get home.” He said.

“Give me a minute.” Bucky laughed. “I have to go baby, but I’ll call when I’m on my way home.” He said.

“Alright, and be careful. I don’t want to have to patch you up like last time.” You said.

“What do you mean? I’m always careful.” He laughed.

“Yeah you’re also full of shit.” You laughed. “Just make sure you come home in one piece.”

“I will.” He said before you both said goodbye and hung up leaving you to wait and worry till he called saying he was coming home.