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How To Tell A Guy You’re Transgender

7268) I find it sad when people say I can't be trans if my end goal is to look androgynous as opposed to completely feminine. I find it even sadder when the people who say this are trans too.

Recently, I received one of the oddest Tumblr Anonymous messages I’ve received in a while. It wasn’t necessarily brutal, nor was it anything I haven’t heard in varying forms before, but it said: “Okay. You’ve had your 15 minutes of fame. Time to give up the crusade and return to the real world.”

And I wasn’t going to say anything about it, right? It was anonymous - the person wasn’t even brave enough to show me any identity, just some random troll. No big deal. I’ve heard worse. But then some things happened today and I want to talk about it.

I sat in the back of a room of people at a conference, and once I looked around, I saw more than a handful of individuals in uniform. The panel was “Opportunity and Diversity in the US Armed Forces” and they were, when I walked in, talking about transgender service - on how to be a fully inclusive military. There were two JAG Officers speaking - a Navy Lieutenant Commander and an Air Force Captain, a former Army medic who now does big time EEOC work in the civilian side, and a former Naval Surface Warfare Officer who now does both nursing and practices law (and happens to be transgender).

I braced myself, knowing that for the first time since March, I was surrounded by military individuals who probably have seen their fair share of transgender service members files…but the conversation was positive. It was “How can we get this changed? What can we do to help our military? How do we make this a safer place for our soldiers, sailors, Marines, and airmen?”


I say all of this in response to the above ignorance because this isn’t my crusade. Would it be easier if it were just me striking out alone and I was the only person who cared about this issue? In some ways, yeah. Because then I would know there weren’t hundreds of thousands of transgender veterans who feel the same way I do right now. I would know that there aren’t 15,000 actively serving transgender service members who feel the same way I felt. But mostly, I am thrilled I’m not the only one because this is an issue that requires all hands on deck to get it changed. This is an issue that requires people to get angry. To get emotional. To get all sorts of fired up about it.

And we do.

There are definitely days where it gets hard. It gets damn hard to have to rehash this experience over and over and over again. It gets hard sometimes to even be reminded that I’m transgender. To be reminded that because I am transgender, it cost me everything I had worked for. Sometimes, I forget why I do this at all.

And then a Surface Warfare Officer who left the service long before her time should have been up, to begin to truly pursue the meaning of the values we still live by - honor, courage, and commitment - gives me her Officer’s crest.

And I am reminded of why I do this.

The military trains us to fight - all different kinds of battles…and crusades, if you will.

You damn well better believe we’re going to do what we were trained to do.


7261) I wish someone told me 10 years ago that you don't have to love pink or wear dresses or go by any superficial female gender roles to be trans. I find it very annoying that so many people, including other trans women, have upheld this lie for so long.

Hi followers!

How are you all doing today? I was feeling sad so I put on a smile because I enjoy my smile and how genuine it has become through transitioning.

Hopefully it can help you out if you are feeling sad, or boost you higher if things are great, because I love and appreciate every single one of you who lets me post my silly selfies and other stuff onto your dashboards.

Have a wonderful day, all of you!

7265) I'm questioning my gender while my girlfriend questions her sexuality, and we're still together and very happy with each other through our questioning. I'm glad i have her.

Being trans is not a gender in and of itself. I am still a boy, that trans girl is still a girl, we are not some weird thing standing entirely outside of usual gender. Please stop referring to us like that.

7266) You say that I am wrong. For being who I am. Call me a freak or weirdo. That I'll always be a man. Condoning viscous violence. To all my sisters and I. The world is going to hell. And they wonder why.
I call this “other people’s” disorder. Because transgender people know who they are, they’re not disordered, but when other people are confronted by transgender individuals, frequently they are the one’s who are confused, and they are the one’s who are disordered.
—  Christine Milrod, PhD. (From the show “Taboo" 5:18-5:38)
7259) Being a trans lesbian is really hard for me. Every time I look at my partner's body, it reminds me how much I hate my own. The self-loathing I feel has lead to me being anorexic, because maybe if I just lose a little bit more weight I'll be okay with my body.

BBC Two has commissioned the UK’s first transgender sitcom, following a successful screening of a pilot at the Salford Sitcom Showcase.

Written and created by Elliott Kerrigan and co-writer, Simon Caryle, Boy Meets Girl, will be set and filmed in and around Manchester.

The script was originally discovered through a BBC talent search in 2013, which offered comedy writers up to £5k for a script which promoted a positive portrayal of transgender characters.

It’s about Leo, who’s been fired from his job again and his love life isn’t much better as his blind date has failed to show up. Then he finds Judy. They bond over drinks and despite the age gap, arrange a second date.

The 6x30minute series is produced by Tiger Aspect for BBC Two. The series producer is Margo Gavan Duffy and the exec producer is Sophie Clarke-Jervoise.