I know my friends aren’t faking liking me because there’s no way anyone could stand being around such an asshole without seeing something positive

At The Bus Stop, After The Car Is Kept At The Mechanics Two Days Longer Than Anticipated

165: Do you consider yourself well organized? How often do you have to look for your keys?

I leave my keys in my pants pocket four out of five days.
I make too many copies or too few copies or break the copier and have no copies.
I fall asleep with the phone in my hand, midtext, and it does not charge the way it should.
I broke my bed and learned how to sleep with my head lolling backwards.
I say life has notched the difficulty up one level when I wasn’t looking, malevolent videogame, the cheating AI. Or I will say
twang the string.
I am not afraid of the take, the loss, the run, the waking, the set
my teeth and wait. See how far it’ll pull before it goes, you know.
I do not know anything else but the monkeyed joystick, never played otherwise.

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