I recently visited two of my hometown besties, Jen and Arielle, who both live in the Maryland/Washington DC metro area. They’re constantly telling me they miss the bagels and pizza of the New Jersey/New York region. With good reason, as I finally sampled some Washington DC ‘za at Matchbox and now fully believe the misfortune that graces their every day lives.
As you can see by this overly fancy menu cover, this place was one of those gourmet, personal pie kinda places. So right off the bat it is not actually real pizza. But when in Rome…
First up, the white chicken pesto pizza. This kind of just looks like alien goop, but the “locals” of the birthday-dinner-crowd insisted it was good. Jen and Arielle know what’s up and they recognize it’s not real-deal pizza. It was soggy, no sauce, no structure, bland chicken….definitely alien goop. The pesto was pretty good to be honest, but pesto is for pasta and not a pizza topping! I think the olive-oily pesto contributed to this slice’s soggy-ness, and not in a good way! I don’t want to say the pesto saved this slice, because the presentation was so lackluster!
Next up, black olive and prosciutto white slice. I do like black olives and of course prosciutto because I’m Italian so I have to like it or my father would disown me. To my knowledge, I don’t think I had previously had prosciutto on pizza, so I was more into this one. However, it was still another sad, soggy, small slice, but looked a little nicer than the chicken pesto pie. The prosciutto added a good salty kick and texture, but nowhere near enough to win me over.
I’m giving this place a 1 because the slices were AT LEAST edible. They could have tasted really super extra nasty, but they were consumable despite hesitations. They just weren’t good, classic slices. General rule of thumb: stay away trendy, chic-looking “gourmet” pizza places. Until next time, DC….
PS - I also went to the National Zoo while in DC and I got to play on a giant pizza playground which was far more enjoyable than eating that shit up there.
Now that’s some pizza bliss.