On Celebrating National Cat Day

I woke up at 3 a.m.
Then I woke up at  3 p.m.
Then I napped
Then I lovingly sat on your lap
Then you lovingly pet me on your lap
Then I freed the plants from the tyranny of the pots
Then I freed the glasses from the tyranny of the counter
Then I felt free enough to openly lick myself down there
As if I were made of ice cream down there
Then I did something on your carpet
Then I did something on your other carpet
Neither was the cheap carpet
Then I freed some skin from the tyranny of the dog’s nose
Then I woke up at 11 p.m.
Then I looked out the window
And reflected on all I did this special day
And I wondered, “Where is my parade?”

Francesco Marciuliano, I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats

貓詩。《我可以尿在上面》
On Celebrating National Cat Day

I woke up at 3 a.m.
Then I woke up at  3 p.m.
Then I napped
Then I lovingly sat on your lap
Then you lovingly pet me on your lap
Then I freed the plants from the tyranny of the pots
Then I freed the glasses from the tyranny of the counter
Then I felt free enough to openly lick myself down there
As if I were made of ice cream down there
Then I did something on your carpet
Then I did something on your other carpet
Neither was the cheap carpet
Then I freed some skin from the tyranny of the dog’s nose
Then I woke up at 11 p.m.
Then I looked out the window
And reflected on all I did this special day
And I wondered, “Where is my parade?”

Francesco Marciuliano, I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats

#Audi #icouldpeeonthis #Francesco #Marciuliano

Books I would like to read in September

1. Insurgent - Veronica Roth

2. I Knead my Mommy- Francesco Marciuliano

3. The Great Gatsby- F. Scott Fitzgerald

4. Last Night I Sang to the Monster- Benjamin Alire Saenz

5. An Abundance of Katherines- John Green

6. Fates- Lanie Bross *Netgalley*

7. Fire and Flood- Victoria Scott *Netgalley*

8. Can’t Look Away- Donna Cooner *Netgalley*

9. The Iron Trail- Holly Black and Cassandra Clare *Netgalley*

10. Fall For You- Cecilia Gray *Netgalley*

I have been reading a lot more the last few weeks so hopefully I can get a good chunk of these done. If you have read any of these please let me know what you thought of them!

They say there are
Twenty-four hours in a day
But I’m only up for three of them
And two I consider overtime
CAT PROVERB
—  Excerpt From: Marciuliano, Francesco. “I Could Pee on This.” Chronicle. iBooks.
Review: I Knead My Mommy and Other Poems by Kittens

Real quick Review: I Knead My Mommy and Other Poems by Kittens #catstuff #thatsnormal

[dropcap]I[/dropcap] don’t like to brag about “successes” we have here at That’s Normal, but I’m totally going to do that today because I’ve made it you guys. (almost) 6 years after writing on the internet day in and day out, after countless interviews with directors and screenwriters I’ve pretended to be knowledgeable about, after faking my way through too many to count red carpet interviews, I…

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Sometimes it seems like that’s what life is. These moments of joy. And these moments of heartache. And all those moments you just reflect on one or the other…
—  Francesco Marciuliano

There has always been a marked difference in the way dog people and cat people talk about their pets. Dog people will commence any discussion of their cuddly companion with effusive praise and conclude by taking their loved one by the furry jowls and exclaiming, “Who’s a good dog? Who’s a good dog? YOU’RE a good dog!” Cat people, however, will often start their anecdotes with a long sigh and conclude by showing a photo of their cat somehow simultaneously tangled up in both the Christmas tree lights and track lighting, noting, “It was my own fault for ever going to the bathroom.”

Francesco Marciuliano, author of I Could Pee on This and Other Poems by Cats, on the Chronicle Books Blog.

I Could Pee on This

Her new sweater doesn’t smell of me
I could pee on that
She’s gone out for the day and
left her laptop on the counter
I could pee on that
Her new boyfriend just pushed
my head away
I could pee on him
She’s ignoring me ignoring her
I could pee everywhere
She’s making up for it
by putting me on her lap
I could pee on this
I could pee on this

— 

I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats, by Francesco Marciuliano

Read more poetry (paired with ridiculously cute cat photos) on Huffington Post.

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