Diaval: What have you done to my beautiful self?
Maleficent: Would you rather I let them beat you to death?
Diaval: …I’m not sure.
Maleficent: Oh, stop complaining. I saved your life.
Diaval: I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now.

Today in Skyrim,

I became a bird at the blacksmith’s in Whiterun.
Srsly, I jumped over a rock, and this dumb bitch was in my way so the game glitched and i was just floating around like Danny Fucking Phantom.
& like, since your arms go up and fall back down with your jump in the game, because of the glitch i was just fucking flapping my arms.
It was the most glorious day.

I finally leveled up to a manbird.