Give me an AU where:

  • All Dwarves look manly (dwarvish?) as fuck when fully clothed, but in fact half of they are actually female.
  • All Elves look female when fully clothed, but again half of them are male.
  • Not in a “you look masculine/femenine” way, in a “I have no idea what’s down yor pants and I couldn’t care less” way.
  • Like them not even being able to know.
  • And it drives Men crazy as fuck.
  • And Hobbits just shrug, lit their pipes and are all like “but why do you even care?”
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