Adventures in Dating…
- Mr. Monday is a flake and ain’t nobody got time. Number deleted.
- Dude who I was supposed to go on a date with yesterday is a snake and (wait for it)….HAS A GIRLFRIEND! Dude, get the entire fuck out. Forever. Evil awful human.
- I found out said info by simply going to his Facebook page. Dude, Facebook is like a glass window: I can see you and your “relationship status” and all the pictures she tags you in with hearts, dummy!
- I was chatting with a handsome fellow yesterday and it came to a crash when he said, “Just so you know, I’m 7 inches long and the girth is a little less than a soda can!” Yikes. I mean…Yikes.
- Buy a girl a drink first before you talk about your anatomy. For the love of all things…stop!
- Cooking dinner for myself and enjoying a glass of wine and the Rich Kids of Beverly Hills is a far superior time lately for me than hanging out with dudes.
- A bunch of 48 year old men (and older) like me on Match, so there’s that.
- I cannot tell you the laughs and nopes I say out loud through this entire process, but whatever, they’re good stories to share.
- Also, ladies, if a dude is interested, you will know. You won’t ever question it. I promise.
- I would rather read a zillion books than go on another disappointing date, but at least I’m putting myself out there.
- That counts, right??
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