leveraging

  • Hardison:So, what, you don't need me either now? You don't need me?
  • Eliot:No, for f-- Listen to me, okay? So Parker's out with a handsome guy, okay. And he's also a thief and also does cool thief stuff, and you're the computer... geek, dude..
  • Hardison:I-Is that you're pep talk? Are you kidding me? What the hell's going on? Really?
  • Eliot:It's a little rough, but the fact--
  • Hardison:It's a little rough? A little rough? As a friend, you're dead to me. What- don't-- Please, do go on. What are you trying to say? I'm not exciting? What is it?
  • Eliot:That's not what I'm saying. If I said that, then that means I would be thinking about you and Parker, which I never do!
  • Hardison:Then what- say what you need to say. What are you saying?
  • Eliot:Maybe you're slow-playing it, just a little bit.
  • Hardison:Slow-playing? Like, I need to be more assertive or something?
  • Eliot:Assertive is good.
  • Hardison:More assertive?
  • Eliot:Yeah. Focus.
  • Hardison:Like the definitive Dexter's dictionary definition of-- Aight, cool. That's all I need. That's all I need. You know what, I got this.

sadgaywerewolf asked:

Super hot cosplayers who doesn't k is the fandom but just wanted to look sexy in a costume and disappointed but flustered fan AU

“Parker,” Hardison hesitated, than continued. “Parker, I thought we agreed that we couldn’t both be Han Solo.” 

Parker paused in the act of making sure her prop gun was tucked securely in it’s holster. “Yes?” She was wearing her ‘and why are you wasting my time with this?’ face and Hardison took a deep, steadying breath.

“Then why are we both dressed as Han Solo?” 

Parker shook her hair out of her face. “We agreed. I thought you meant that you wouldn’t go as Han Solo.”

“No, Parker, I.” Hardison took another breath. “I meant that I would go as Han Solo.”

“Oh,” Parker thought that over. “You weren’t very clear.”

“Woman,” Hardison started, than stopped. “You know what, I don’t care. You look good, damn good.”

“Yeah?” Parker tossed her hair dramatically and pulled out her prop gun “Don’t ever tell me the odds.”

“No, it’s never tell, you know what, never mind. You look great.” 

Parker jerked her head past him, already done listening. “Isn’t that that guy you like?” 

Hardison follows her gaze to an almost perfect Boba Fett costume, armour scratched in the right places, beautifully detailed gun cocked at the ready. “Damn.” Hardison says, following the man with his eyes. He has the walk down, the ‘don’t mess with me or else’ walk.

“Let’s go say hi!” Parker says, and is already bounding off before Hardison can stop her. Rolling his eyes, Hardison follows, hoping that this won’t end like the New York Comic-con debacle of 2014.

To his relief, Parker has already struck up a seemingly normal conversation with Boba Fett, his voice coming out muffled through the helmet. 

“Yeah, I’m here with my Hardison,” Parker is saying. “I thought about going as Darth Vadar, with the,” she makes sounds imitating Darth Vadar’s mask “but it’s so hot.”

“Your Hardison, huh?” Boba Fett asks, and even through the mask, Hardison gets the feeling the guy is giving her a once over.

“That would be me,” Hardison reaches out his hand, calm and cool. Parker can flirt, or be flirted with, as much as she wants. SHe’s not his property. (He thinks, sometimes, that he just might be hers, owned and claimed.)

“Two Han Solos?” The guy’s tone is arch, amused. Hardison just raises an eyebrow in reply. 

“He didn’t want to be slave Leia,” Parker says, mock pouting. The guys laugh is low and rough, and it makes Hardison’s fingers tingle. 

“Shame.” 

Both of Hardison’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise, but Parker just laughs. 

“Do we get to see your face, mysetrious bounty hunter?”

He doesn’t miss the way the guy goes tense at that, visible even through the armor, but he gets momentarily distracted by the way Parker’s fingers are inching towards the guys knife. Not part of the standard costume, but painted enough to match. God, it’s JUST like NYCC, and there is no way to nudge her without calling more attention to it.

Then Boba Fett’s arm shoots out, catching Parker’s wrist as smooth as breathing. 

“You’re a thief,” he says. A statement of fact, not an accusation.

Parker only laughs. 

“What makes you say that?” Hardison asks, trying to play it cool. He has a jerry-rigged lazer in his own gun, but it won’t do more than blind this guy if it comes to a fight. 

Boba Fett holds up Parker’s hand, as though Hardison doesn’t know it as well as his own by now. “Her calluses.”

“Her calluses?” Hardison’s voice is skeptical, neither confirming or denying. 

Boba Fett let’s her go and takes off his helmet and damn. Damn. 

“They’re very distinctive calluses.” His voice is just as deep and gravelly outside of the helmet, and yeah, it is really working for Hardison. Damn. 

“You’re a bounty hunter,” Parker replies, and her tone is light, playful.

Boba Fett’s eyes dart over to her. “Yeah.”

“No, I mean, you’re a bounty hunter.” She holds up a, something, Hardison can’t make it out, just out of reach of Boba Fett. Sometimes Parker really is too good, Hardison hadn’t even seen her take that one.

“Give that back,” Boba Fett says, and his voice is so cold it gives Hardison chills. 

Parker shrugs and tosses it back, nonchalant.

“Oh hell no,” Hardison snaps, putting the pieces together. Parker and Boba Fett both turn to look at him. “You aren’t even a Star Wars fan are you? You’re just being cute.”

Boba Fett grins, sharp and dangerous. “Buy me a drink,” he says “and find out.”

Leverage OT3 Sleep Headcanons
  • As we all know, every member of the Leverage OT3 has horrible nightmares from time to time.  Hardison likes being cuddled afterwards while Eliot and Parker would rather, like, sit in silence and enjoy the comfort of the other’s presence.  Most of the time.  Only one night Eliot wakes up confused and scared and grabs at the nearest safe warm thing he can find, which happens to be Hardison.  And he just cries quietly into Hardison’s chest for a minute and Hardison has this “what the fuck is happening” look on his face, but he just goes with it.  (Parker is not sure what is happening either so she just starts petting his hair or something).  And then Eliot realizes what he’s doing and pulls back and is just like “We do not speak of this again, this does not leave this room” and tries to go back to sleep.
  • Part of the reason Eliot wants to pretend it never happened is because of the whole Eliot Thing where Eliot can never admit that he has had an emotion, and also because he doesn’t want to Burden His Innocent Partners with his Inner Darkness.  However, part of the reason is also that Eliot does not want to encourage Hardison, because…
  • …Hardison is such a sleep-cuddler.  Like, every three mornings or so Eliot wakes everyone up with a “damn it, Hardison”, because Hardison is hardcore snuggling him, like, with his face pressed into Eliot’s neck and everything.  This annoys Eliot so much, because he likes to get up early and cook breakfast for everyone before they wake up, but he can’t do that if he has to yell at his boyfriend and wake everyone up.
  • It also annoys Eliot because he is worried that if he allows Hardison to sleep-cuddle him, sooner or later, he will get the urge to sleep-cuddle him back.  Which is unacceptable, partly for Eliot Feelings reasons, but also partly because he is worried that he will involuntarily injure Hardison in his sleep, and Eliot, careful and considerate baby wooly mammoth that he is, cannot allow that to happen.
  • Hardison does not have this problem with Parker because Parker will not stay still long enough to be cuddled.  Parker is constantly moving around in her sleep and ends up in a new weird position every morning.  It is not unusual for Eliot and Hardison to wake up with Parker’s feet in their faces and at this point they just shrug and accept it.
  • Also, Parker snores.  Look, I’m only on season 2, I don’t know if this (or anything I’m writing), is contradicted by canon somehow, but.  Parker snores.  She’s this suave expert cat burglar thief and she fucking snores.  And of course she had no idea until Eliot and Hardison told her.
  • Basically Parker is the most annoying person in the world to sleep in the same bed with and she absolutely revels in it.  And once a week Eliot is like, “smh Parker if you do that one more time you are sleeping on the goddamn couch” but everyone knows he doesn’t mean it.

becauseforoncethisisme asked:

Leverage OT3, sweet pea

Eliot is the one to start the windowboxes. He starts them with herbs, of course, for the cooking he does for the team and for the brewpub downstairs too. Every time Hardison opens the windows, he smells rosemary and orange thyme and marjoram, all of which he can only identify because Eliot labels them.

Parker joins in next. Mostly she plants seeds from apples when she eats them, and peas, most of which don’t sprout, but she brings a few flower seeds too, and they add a little color whenever Hardison looks outside.

Hardison adds a whole windowbox for the flowers because it feels like more of a home with flowers, and even if he has to replace them every few months because he kills them by accident, it still makes him smile whenever he looks out the window.

Mostly, though, they all pay attention to Eliot’s herbs. No one but Eliot is allowed to water them or pick them, but all of them sometimes open the window and rub the leaves between their fingers to smell.

I dozed and woke up and thought I was at Leverage.

Turns out it’s just hot and there are a ton of Bay Area rationalists in my house.

Leverage Beauty and the Beast AU where Hardison is the nerdy inventor’s son who agrees to stay with the Beast in his father’s place, Eliot is the town’s best hunter who follows Hardison into the woods because he is concerned for his well-being even though he will never admit it, and Parker is the Beast and they have to teach her how to people.

After they break the curse they find the enchantress and rob her blind.

daughter-of-adam said: Don’t Parker and Jokers have strikingly similar back stories though? I mean even down to blowing up their awful parents/guardians in some cases.

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YES.  Especially that moment where Sophie asks Parker to think about something that made her sad and suggested her dad’s death, and Parker started laughing.  I feel like Parker is probably a Joker template cousin.