Rewatching "Halloween Surprise"
  • leslie:well my boyfriend might not be moving back for awhile...
  • me:wait for it...
  • ben:*enters the room*
  • me:wait for it...
  • leslie:hey, i didn't know you were coming back here.
  • me:*happy pterodactyl noises*
  • ben:well
  • leslie:what are you doing?
  • me:it's happening it's happening it's happening
  • ben:*gets down on one knee*
  • me:*squeals*
  • leslie:what are you doing?
  • me:*falls on the floor*
  • ben:i'm thinking about my future
  • me:*cries forever*

It’s been a weird evening. David and I watched the episodes of Parks and Rec when Ben and Leslie get married because he hadn’t seen them. Then we watching Beginners, which neither of us had seen. And I had ugly sobbing in the middle and we had to take a break. It was the little dishes of pills. I wrote a comic about those once. 

What a beautiful heart breaking lovely movie. Everything hurts, but I am so damn grateful to be here in my messy living room, with my husband in the flannel pyjamas I gave him two Christmases ago with little skiers on them. And the cat is purring. And I love them so much. But jesus. fuck. Life hurts and I miss my mom. I miss my dad. I’m sad David never got to meet them.

And I came back here and that last post got more than 12k notes in a few hours. That makes me really happy because hopefully people are donating to help. The world hurts and yet it’s healing at the same time. IDK if that makes any sense, but my face hurts from crying and I have to go follow my husband around while he’s trying to brush his teeth.