legally-blonde

me as a lawyer

me: so you took a shower and then you heard the gun shot
witness: what
me as a lawyer: isn’t the first cardinal rule of perm maintenance that you’re forbidden to wet your hair for at least 24 hours after getting a perm at the risk of deactivating the immonium thygocolate
witness: i robbed a bank?
me: HA you confessed! I win bitches fuck you all