"Good. Speaking of." He points to the quietly vibrating notebook. "I don’t know what to do with this." Another brick falls off the stack.

“Well, it would seem your book is vibrating.” Lafeyette really is a genius. Perhaps one day her greater intellect will be rewarded. Today isn’t that day. Relenting she adds in, “What exactly do you want me to do about it?”

"I don’t know!" He throws up his hands. "What do you do with vibrating books?"

“Well!” Sighing she lifts her hands up and makes a few noncommittal gestures. “What are its contents? Did you do anything to trigger it? Where is it from? I’ve not dealt with vibrating books and, frankly, I’m going to need more information here, Doctor.”

"Do I look like the primary source of information on vibrating books? It’s there. It’s vibrating. It won’t stop. It helped with my back pain a bit but, frankly, I need to concentrate and the noises don’t make it convenient."

The book vibrates out of what’s probably pure spite, by now.

10 years in the future AU


This is a mostly unedited batch of word vomit and I don’t really plan on refining it any time soon. 

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  • Lafey:"Yeah these are my two dads. Sometimes my one dad puts on a dress and I have to practice flirting on him"
  • Lafey:"Sometimes I assist them with larceny, breaking and entering, extortion, and murder"
  • Lafey:"p normal"

In all honestly Lafeyette did like travelling by rooftops. When she could wiggle her way onto one it was more a matter of leg work than pulling her own body weight. Lion’s Arch rooftops, however, were a far cry from the stability of Divinity’s Reach shingles. It’s not as if she could blame the creaky planks for being the way they were after what Scarlet did but, well, it certainly wasn’t making her travels any easier. Home was just a hope skip and a jump away (literally) which meant that she wasn’t too far from being able to pull out the splinters that were making room on her clothes and one—she was sure—in her skin. 

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Watch on dying-phylactery.tumblr.com

To further prove that Lafey’s player is a total weeb, here’s a song!

This was kind of my go to “misery event horizon” song for Lafey because it is self indulgently sad (and I love that shit).