kang ma roo

"Eun Gi asked me. At that time, in the tunnel,… why didn’t I avoid the car? Even though I told Eun Gi that I don’t remember, I remember the reason very clearly. At the time, I was exhausted by the world and by my lot in life, and this present life of mine even if it ended this way, I thought it wouldn’t make a difference. And that in the next life, I would definitely meet Eun Gi and then the ordinary kind of love that everyone does, the simple kind of love that regardless of who they are and what they do in the world get to experience. That ordinary kind of love. I want to start all over again. This is what I think I prayed to God."
- Kang Ma Roo

2

This is a story about desire and redemption, where love is an emotion that isn’t always pure because it can cause so much pain, but it’s an emotion that cannot be ignored and discounted when it happens.

  • I know Eun Gi and Maru love each other, I don’t need to see them kiss or roll in the sack to confirm it. They know it, but there is so much more beyond that. Their love is expressed in how he holds her all night in his arms, watching the exhausted her sleep in his arms. Their love is revealed in how she pushes him away yet clings on to him, her heart and her mind at war over this man who haunts her soul even if she has no memories.
  • I don’t need Eun Gi to regain her memories right away, because watching her wrestle with the process shows us both Maru’s love for her, and her love for him. She struggles against truths that she knows is frightening, even as she consciously wants to step up and move forward because otherwise she is just standing in place while everyone around her hovers. I was shaking my head at Jae Hee’s insistence that Maru is motivated by pity for Eun Gi rather than love, and that love is only what Maru felt for Jae Hee.

I realize looking back that Maru’s greatest sacrifice for Jae Hee was taking the murder rap for her, which never risked his life but merely his future. Whereas with Eun Gi, from the moment he descended down the cliff to rescue her doll because he heard her heart and lips cry out for her omma, Maru has been risking his life for Eun Gi. He never wanted to die for Jae Hee, but he wanted to die with Eun Gi in that tunnel, and now I bet his hematoma isn’t getting treated because he needs to be around for Eun Gi. It’s not pity that motivates Maru, it was always a love that was real but impossible to accept because he still believed he loved only Jae Hee. Now that he’s able to love Eun Gi openly, I am content watching this drama just allow him to connect with her without any artifice, even knowing that all his past lies are indeed a bridge he will have to cross soon.

When Maru held Eun Gi through the night, I was sobbing like a loony because of his tenderness and love for her just shining in his eyes. When he tended to her cuts and told her to lash out at him, I wanted to just whisk them away to a happy place to live out the rest of their lives. When he sat in that bathroom while she cried herself to sleep, I just knew that the depth of their despair was due to their undeniable love for each other, a love that has brought them both happiness and pain in the past. Jae Hee is wrong that Maru has only ever loved her and his feelings for Eun Gi are pity. His words to the prosecutor tells us exactly what Eun Gi means to him now – she is his reason to live when he once only wanted to die. 

Agree!!it summarized eveything I want to say! Me sobbing right now ;(


credit to Koalasplayground.