I’m really, really, really sorry it took so long for me to post this part. It’s just that I’ve been through a really tough couple of weeks. I had this huge fight with my best friend in the world, and then I kinda fell in love with the boy I’ve known longer than anyone where I live. And it’s just been crazy. But here it is, and I’m so thankful for you guys being understanding and patient, I couldn’t really ask for more. So thank you, you mean so much. And thanks for 100(+) notes and 2,3 beautiful followers. Here’s part 14, I hope y’all enjoy!
"You don’t understand, you don’t understand what you do to me when you hold his hand."
PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART5 PART 6 PART 7 PART 8 PART 9 PART 10 PART 11 PART 12 PART 13
Fireworks. Everywhere. Finally our lips met again, I had been longing for those lips for so long. But even though this felt so good, I knew it wasn’t right. I couldn’t do something like this to Sam. He hadn’t been anything but honest to me, and here I was, kissing his best friend on the day before Christmas Eve. I felt like a complete monster.
As I pulled away, I gasped for air. “Jack, what are you doing?” I asked. He bit his lip as he looked at me. “I’m sorry. I- I-” he stuttered. “You can’t do that, I’m with Sammy,” I said as I looked away for a second. “I know, but I just couldn’t resist kissing you anymore. I can’t stand watching you with him. Whenever you guys hold hand, kiss in public, laugh together and cuddle up, I can’t stop thinking that it should be me holding you like that. That I should be the guy who made your head go messy and your stomach fill with butterflies whenever you see me. The guy who can make you smile whenever you’re down. I just… I just miss you, Bambi,” he said, his voice shaking and his eyes filling up with tears. “Well, Jack. You missed your chance. I don’t feel the same way about you as I once did,” I said coldly, looking at the ground. He took a deep breath as he placed his fingers on my chin before lifting it up until our eyes met. “Bambi, does he make you feel like I do?” he breathed. “Does he send chills down your spine whenever he strokes your skin like this?” he whispered as he let his fingertips slide lightly over my skin, making me shiver like crazy. I knew he saw it, because a huge smile was planted on those perfect lips of his. “Does he make you whimper when he kisses your neck like I do?” he asked as he pulled me closer to him, pressing his lips softly again my neck. And he made me whimper, of course. I could feel him smiling against my neck. “Jack…” I whispered, trying to control my breath. He kissed his way up to my ear. “And does he make you want him like I make you want me?” he whispered as he lightly and playfully bit my ear. He knew too well what he did to me. I closed my eyes and breathed heavily, trying to focus. Don’t let him get to you, (Y/N). You’re better than that. As I took a deep breath, I pushed him away. “Jack, stop,” I said coldly. He looked at me. “Jack, I’m happy with Sam. He treats me like a princess, and I really do care about him,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. “I love him, Jack. Can’t you just understand that?” I could see the pain in his eyes as he shook his head. “You don’t love him,” he whispered. “How do you know that?” I asked as I tilted my head to the left. “I can see it in your eyes. You don’t look at him like you look at me,” he said. “I look at you with disgust,” I snapped. He looked deep into my eyes “Can you honestly look me in the eyes and tell me that you don’t love me?” he asked. “If you do that, I’m going to leave you alone,” he continued, breathing deeply. Of course I loved him. I loved him more than I was ever going to love anyone in this entire world. And he knew I did. “I don-” I started as I breathed in. Oh my god, why did this have to be so hard? Four words, twelve letters and he was gone - which meant Sam and I could be left alone. I took a deep breath and looked at him. "I don’t love you, Jack Finnegan Gilinsky."
Days had gone, and I hadn’t left the house once since Jack and I talked. I was an emotional mess. Heartbroken, guilty, angry, sad, happy. Sam had tried to call me several times, but I chose not to take it, because it was too much. I felt so guilty for kissing that asshole called Jack Gilinsky & it would just get worse if I talked to Sam about it. Sam. How I missed him. I missed his strong arms around me, his adorable laugh, his smile. I just missed him, and I felt so empty without him. But whenever I thought of Sam, I couldn’t help but seeing Gilinsky’s face, hearing his voice repeating: "You don’t love him." And I started to question myself; Was Jack right? Did I really love Sam as much as I said I did?
New years eve. “(Y/N)!” Jackson shouted from downstairs. “What?” I shouted back. “Someone’s here. He wants to see you!” he shouted. “Ugh,” I sighed as I stood up. What did Jack do here? I mean, he told he he’d leave me alone. After putting my hair in a ponytail and pulling a hoodie over my head, I walked downstairs. When I got down and out in the hallway, I looked up at the person standing in the door. My eyes met a couple brown ones, and that adorable smile appeared. Samuel Wilkinson. A huge smile spread across my lips as I ran towards him “Sammy!” I squealed as I jumped up in his arms. Tears started to show up in the corners of my eyes, God how I missed this boy. He spun me around several times, smiling bigger than ever before. “Baby girl,” he whispered as he put me down. He pulled me into a hug and kissed my forhead lightly before looking at me. I was so happy. “Let’s go upstairs,” I said as I took his hand and intertwined our fingers before we walked upstairs to my room.
As I closed the door, we sat down on my bed. “How was Europe?” I asked, smiling. “It was amazing,” he said, returning a smile. “What did you do?” I asked as I crossed my legs. “Well, we visited some family, went skiing and stuff,” he smiled. “Did you have fun?” I asked, letting my gaze slide over him several times. I started to feel sick when I thought of the Jack-thing. I had to tell him now. He nodded. “What have you been doing?” he asked. “Nothing much, actually. I’ve just stayed here with my family, waiting for you to come home,” I said as I bit my lip. He placed his fingers under my chin as he pressed his lips against mine. “I missed you a lot,” he whispered, making me smile. “I missed you too,” I whispered, happy, but at the same time nauseous about the thought of what I’d done.
As he was going to kiss me again, I pulled away. “Sam, there’s something I need to tell you…” I said as I looked down. “What?” he said, confused. “Um, well..” I started, looking up at him. He had his arms crossed over his chest as he looked with me with a curious look. “The day before Christmas Eve, there was this concert..” I started. “Michael Bublè right? Was he any good?” he asked with a smile playing in the corners of his mouth. I shrugged. “I don’t know really. I didn’t listen because I met Jack there..” I kept on going, and I saw Sam’s jaw clench. “We started talking..” I said, seeing how he tried to control his breath. “You talked..” he said as he nodded. I took a deep breath. “After talking for a while, Jack and I kind of… kissed,” I whispered. “You what?!”
Okay, the ending to this part was like terrible ahahaha. Anyways, thanks for waiting and thanks for reading. I’ll try to post part 15 a lot faster than I posted part 14, hah. Anyways, a Luke Hemmings fanfic is actually on it’s way, so y’all 5sos fans have something to look forward to. This story is going to be on Wattpad tho. Anyways, thanks for reading, I hope you liked this part, and uh 5 notes for next.